Sexual Relationships
1 mo

How do I deal with being an unattractive woman?

I'm in my early 20s and the guy I've been with for 7 years were out on a date. He checked the waitress's ass out and I mentioned that I noticed and had some tears come to my eyes. Then he flipped me off (middle finger) for being upset and being mad at him about it. I even paid for the bill at the end. This isn't the only time he has checked other women out in public. He also watches other women in porn religiously, even if I fuck him everyday, so I stopped fucking him and he doesn't really care. How do I deal with being unattractive and not good enough for men? Its not a coincidence. Other men in the past have wanted other women than me as well and most of them only fucked me a few times and then left. How do I deal with being an unattractive woman? It hurts so bad that I can't take it.

0 0

AI Bot Choice

Superb Opinion

  • The most unattractive thing about is her mental state. You need therapy. He's looking at porn. Most men do. That doesn't mean you're ugly it means he is a visual creature that visually likes variety. I like art. I have an extensive collection that I can't even hang at once and have to rotate through 3k+ sqft of house. I still go to museums and look there. Doesn't detract from the women I'm dating, who are absolutely badazz. I'm hot, or I know a great many liars. Either way, if Chris Hemsworth jogs shirtless by our picnic and she does NOT look, I'm going to have her medically examined for degenerative optic nerves.

    If you stopped f'ing him and he doesn't care (and I've been there), it's quite possibly because he's just sick of the level of shite that comes with the head games, and apathy and resentment are the worst places for a relationship to be. I'd recommend you break up (so both of you can have someone better for them) and you take some time away from dating all together to spend a year focusing on you. You deserve that.

Most Helpful Guy

  • You're at most 24 and you've been together for 7 years? That alone sounds bizarrely challenging, but it's difficult to sort out with such sparse information. I'm going to make a few guesses, just the same.

    First, you sound really insecure and not just about your looks, but that's likely a big one. Thinking you're unattractive because men's eyes wander is just WRONG, so stop doing it. You seriously need to realize that for the VAST majority of men, you can NEVER be good looking enough to keep them from checking out other women. Admittedly, he should have more class and care more about you than to do it so blatantly, especially if he knows you're insecure about it. But he's going to do it anyway whether you see it or not, and that speaks to him, not YOU.

    You also need to learn that fucking a guy regularly in an attempt to keep him around, or prevent his desire to watch porn, or as a way to make him care about you, is NOT going to work. However unattractive YOU think you are, low self-esteem compounds it. Odds are you're a LOT more attractive than you think you are, but lack confidence.

    Heed Rachel's advice too - there are SOOOO many ways to make yourself look prettier physically, but the best thing you can do is be confident and secure in your own value. When you have that, your whole vibe will change and it will draw better men, and better people to you. I suggest you start by dumping this dickhead, continuing to work on your own confidence, and possibly get a make-over or some help from a professional in the field.

    Veganrogue also gave you great advice - for every beautiful woman somewhere, there's a man tired of fucking her. It's not all about looks, girl.

    • I'm 23 but yeah 7 years of this shit. And if a guy has a beautiful girlfriend, he's not gonna look at other women's asses in FRONT OF HER ON A DATE. Then when she starts crying in public, lie to her and say he "wasn't looking" and that she's "crazy", then proceed to fucking give her the middle finger when she's clearly upset. Guys don't pull that shit with beautiful women that they love and appreciate. There MUST be something wrong with me. Also if a beautiful girl is fucking you EVERY FUCKING DAY, ARE YOU GONNA WATCH PORN CONSTANTLY? HELL FUCKING NO.

    • Apparently, you just want to believe what you want to believe, and I'm hear to tell you - you're wrong and you don't get !! Putting it in CAPS and yelling it at someone doesn't make you right. All of these statements below are wrong, and you can post a question with a poll and ask 1,000 guys, and overwhelmingly, they'll disagree with you: 1) " if a guy has a beautiful girlfriend, he's not gonna look at other women's asses in FRONT OF HER ON A DATE" ----------- That's only true if he's got some class, is super into you, and can control his urge to do so. How many guys does that describe in your age range? 2) " if a beautiful girl is fucking you EVERY FUCKING DAY, ARE YOU GONNA WATCH PORN CONSTANTLY? HELL FUCKING NO. ---- Maybe not at first, but again, heed the words of Veganrogue... no matter how good looking you are, or how often you fuck a guy, 50% or more will grow tired of fucking you, or the same girl, every day or night. That's fact, girl. 3) " There MUST be something WRONG with ME? - See #2 above. It's not YOU, it's your guy But there is ONE thing you said that IS true, but not quite HOW you mean it: * " Guys don't pull that shit with (beautiful) women that they love and appreciate." That is true, but YOU think that the love and appreciation is there BECAUSE they are beautiful. What you do NOT understand, is that a man who first LOVES and APPRECIATES you, will always think you're beautiful, whether you're physically a 5, or a 7, or a 10. To him, you're beautiful, and he won't treat you that way. So try really hard to stop believing that its ONLY your looks that matter, and that if you were suddenly a 10, then NO man would do this to you. News flash - some would, and that's not on you.

    • * pardon the autocorrect typo's please... like, I'm here to tell you... etc.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Stop picking ass wads to date is your first step.. Secondly if you see a guy checkout a women in your presence dump him immediately.. third after seven years if the sex dries up it doesn't mean you are unattractive it means your man is a dick and is too lazy to put in effort.. I suggest find a better loving guy and don't fuck them until they show some real love and effort for you.

    • Oh no, the sex dried up because I always caught him on porn even tho I was fucking him multiple times everyday. So I decided if I wasn't enough sexually, I'd just let him have what he fucking prefers which is the slut bitches on porn.

    • It has messed me up. I've had low self esteem since I was a kid, but this is the worst it's ever been. I've gotten to the point where I despise other women and can't help but compare myself constantly and think how they're so much better than me. And I hate going out in public with him anymore. I'm constantly watching his eyes because I've caught him doing this so much. And he always tells me he didn't do it and paints me to be the crazy one. But I have fucking eyes.

    • Seriously you need to breakup.. if a guy is doing that much damage to your self esteem and mental health what is the pros to staying with him? He isn't giving you the love you want.. so just leave while you still got your youth.. and then take some time to get therapy and work on yourself because if you don't love yourself how do you expect to find a guy who will love you how you actually want to be loved?

  • I don’t believe you’re truly unattractive. I cannot answer that well because in our relationship I enjoy when he looks at other people and we like to look at asses and tits together lmao. Perhaps you’re having a bad luck there are definitely men out there that wouldn’t do that to you

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!

Related Questions

Is high body count the fault of men or women?
Why do some people say it’s transphobic to not want to have a relationship with a trans person? Do you think it’s transphobic?
Chubby girls give better blowjob.. Questions for both girls and guys?
Why are female orgasms much longer than male orgasms?

What Girls & Guys Said

6 15

  • Date older guys. They will just be happy to be with a younger girl and probably take care of you too... If you're into that kinda thing

  • First of all please stop being so hard on yourself. I know it hurts, but it's not your fault. I think it's atrocious that he treated you that way. So many guys, especially younger ones are wimps and don't have the balls to end a relationship properly, so they wait until they find another girl and then they fade away. Looks are subjective. There's an expression I've heard a few times, "Show me a beautiful woman and I'll show you a guy that's tired of fucking her". So it's really not about the looks.

    It's not about you, it's about him being an asshole. It's not about you being "good enough". for them. You are more than good enough. It's about them being good enough for you! We chose our partners based on compatibility, however people are so afraid of saying what they really want that people end up in dead end relationships and one partner usually gets hurt as a result. I have no idea what you look like, but I'm sure there are thousands of men around the world that would love to date you. I truly believe that everybody has their other half. It may take a while to find them, but they are out there.

    My recommendation is to not fuck them until you know they like you for you. If I like a girl, I don't care if she makes me wait 5 dates until we kiss. But if I'm only after getting laid a few times and moving on, then that's exactly what will happen. Make sure you have a ton in common besides sex. Sure sex is amazing and should be practiced daily! But if there is no substance to the relationship once the orgasms fade, the relationship is doomed unless it's a purely sexual one. Find someone you love talking to, love hanging out with, doing the things you love to do. I hope this helps.

  • You genuinely seem like a great person. You should find someone who values you as much as you value him.

  • there are many many ways to make yourself prettier

  • This guy sounds like a asshole and porn addict. Leave him its not worth staying with someone that fucked up. No matter how unattractive you are it's possible to find a man that loves you for your personality and treats you right. Looks aren't everything.

    • It has messed me up. I've had low self esteem since I was a kid, but this is the worst it's ever been. I've gotten to the point where I despise other women and can't help but compare myself constantly and think how they're so much better than me. And I hate going out in public with him anymore. I'm constantly watching his eyes because I've caught him doing this so much. And he always tells me he didn't do it and paints me to be the crazy one. But I have fucking eyes.

  • Okay thats not okay what he did. But as an ugly woman myself at least nobody will use you for your looks:)) thats the good part. But maybe you are prettier than you think!

  • Your not unattractive, you just don’t got any confidence in yourself, dump that jerk, quit feeling sorry for yourself, be proud of who you are

  • "Then he flipped me off (middle finger) for being upset and being mad at him about it."

    Where's the love? Get the hell out. Why do you believe you are unattractive? Get some counseling to improve your poor self-image and help you avoid toxic men.

    • I'm 23 but yeah 7 years of this shit. And if a guy has a beautiful girlfriend, he's not gonna look at other women's asses in FRONT OF HER ON A DATE. Then when she starts crying in public, lie to her and say he "wasn't looking" and that she's "crazy", then proceed to fucking give her the middle finger when she's clearly upset. Guys don't pull that shit with beautiful women that they love and appreciate. There MUST be something wrong with me. Also if a beautiful girl is fucking you EVERY FUCKING DAY, ARE YOU GONNA WATCH PORN CONSTANTLY? HELL FUCKING NO.

  • I highly doubt you're as a attractive as you thomk you are. Being attractive can be a state of mind. You've managed to have several guys interested in you which says to me you're not unattractive. All guys check out other women as long as it's just with their eyes only don't worry about it. Feel free to dm me if you want to chat more about it.

  • You are not unattractive... it's just he is a toxic person

  • Why are you with someone who makes you feel that way? Dump him, don’t look back and find someone who will treat you with respect.

  • How do you figure you're ugly just because these losers you keep picking to be with like looking at other girls? Maybe, like most women, you just have shit taste in men.
    Next time you find someone, take a good bit of time getting to know him before you attach yourself to him. THIS is what dating is al about! You kids today are in SUCH A RUSH to go from, "Hi, what's your name?" to, "I do! Let's go have kids!
    TAKE
    YOUR
    FUCKING
    TIME!!
    In your case, go find several guys that you think you might like. Go out with one, a day or so later, go out with umber 2, the next night, go out with number 3, then next night, number 4. whatever! Then, if one seems to be more to your liking, go out with him again. If two or more are nice, alternate between them. Each time, find out a little more about him and, when you find stuff you don't like and you think it won't mesh with you, drop him! If those 4 or 5 guys don't work out, go find a few more and start again!

    • I'm 23 but yeah 7 years of this shit. And if a guy has a beautiful girlfriend, he's not gonna look at other women's asses in FRONT OF HER ON A DATE. Then when she starts crying in public, lie to her and say he "wasn't looking" and that she's "crazy", then proceed to fucking give her the middle finger when she's clearly upset. Guys don't pull that shit with beautiful women that they love and appreciate. There MUST be something wrong with me. Also if a beautiful girl is fucking you EVERY FUCKING DAY, ARE YOU GONNA WATCH PORN CONSTANTLY? HELL FUCKING NO.

    • Nearly ALL guys, no matter HOW gorgeous his SO is, look at other women! My uncle Mike had this gorgeous blonde and they had 7 kids together but, after almost 20 years together, he divorced her and married this horrible woman that NOBODY liked! She smoked, drank like a fish and swore like a truck driver!! She had NO filter and didn't give a fuck who she hurt with the things she said! She was not attractive, had a terrible voice and was only MAYBE 5' tall (he was close to 7'!) and nobody could understand what he saw in her!! They got married and had 2 more kids. Then, you have John Lennon who, just around the same time, divorced his beautiful wife for this not very pretty Japanese woman. When I first started seeing my future ex-fiance, she noticed me looking at few other girls as we walked the streets together. We lived in a major university town where most of the town was owned by at least one of the 3 colleges within about 5 miles of each other so, there were TONS of younger girls roaming around!! (We were both 34.) I owned up to looking at the others but, as I told her, it wasn't that I was window shopping for anything better, to me, they're like beautiful works of art and I'm just admiring them for the very brief moment I have to do so but, NOTHING will EVER take me away from you!! I'm MADLY, VERY DEEPLY in love with YOU!! Had I known she didn't have the same feelings for me, I would've dropped her and gone after one of the other two offers I had just after we started seeing each other! After 10 years of my loyalty to her, SHE cheated on ME!! I wanted to marry her and spend the rest of my life with her and we nearly had two kids together!! At one point, around 9 years in, she even tried to set me up with a cute blonde French girl!! But, I didn't want her! I just wanted my "wife".

    • And, just so you know, there's LOTS of cheating women in the world! All 3 of my ex's were married at the time!! #1 first told me that he beats her up and she's gonna divorce him, anyway. After our first 3 months together, she broke it off and told me she was only using me to make him jealous! My 2nd had JUST gotten married to my guitarist, partly because I kept pushing them to, and then they had a really stupid argument a few weeks later and he left her!! She didn't want to be alone and asked me to stay with her for a few weeks. I did and we fell in love! But, she had a nervous breakdown right after that, spent 6 months in a psych hospital and, when she got out, went back to him! My third, I already told you about, married some guy years before we ever met and was about to have his kid when she found out it had died inside of her. Round about that time, he announced that he wanted to get a sex change!! After she had it, she considered herself not to be married to him, even though they legally were. After about a year, he decided to revert!! Other than that, we played a gig one night and a friend of ours brought a girl in with him that he was dating. During the first break, she kissed me rather passionately!! Before the end of the night, we were all over each other! At a Christmas party where I was working, a friend's wife sat and talked with me for a few minutes and then gave me a fairly passionate kiss!! And, at a new years party, I was sitting between the host and his wife and, for no reason at all, hours before the ball dropped, she turned to me and gave me a French kiss right in front of him!! The other two people I came with saw this and were completely aghast!! To this day, I STILL don't know why she kissed me!!

    • Show All

  • It’s not that you are unattractive, it’s that he doesn’t deserve you.

  • You have some physical appeal, otherwise you wouldn't get dates. Ky beat gutless is that you choose shitty guys or your personality is bad.

  • I suggest finding another man since seems like a toxic relationship

  • you can't

    • I understand. I guess this is just how men treat ugly women?

    • that's right

    • Ok. That hurts. Thank you.

  • I'm so used to it I don't even notice it anymore

  • Change the things within your control

  • immoral naughty ox...

  • I don't have any advice. I wish I did, truly. I can really sympathize with you. But your boyfriend's behavior is unacceptable and he is not even remotely worthy of being your boyfriend.

  • Show More (1)

Latest Questions

Have you ever used Marijuana as a Sex Aid?
What do you think about the new AI Sex Robots and 3-D Porn imagery being used to reduce the population?
How can a man choose between big boobs or small boobs for a long term relationship?
Are there any men on here that enjoy kissing?
Home >  Sexual Relationships  > How do I deal with being an unattractive woman?