Sexual Relationships
+1 y

How do I help my husband understand that I’m too old to be wild in the bedroom?

I’m exhausted to be blunt. Recently I’ve really been feeling the effects of my age. On top of that I’ve had a baby, gained weight and taken on a more stressful position within my career. I’m not into the wild stuff anymore. How do I communicate that without sounding dull.
Updates:
+1 y
For a small update- I went to the doctor about this and she seems to think it’s mostly a hormone issue caused by pregnancy and my hormones never balancing themselves out. Starting meds soon and hopefully it helps. Thanks to everyone who gave me kind advice and everyone who was rude can crawl in a hole somewhere.
0 2

AI Bot Choice

Superb Opinion

  • Is this more of a confidence and post pregnancy fitness thing?

    you are obviously not old, however recent pregnancies can really fuck up your body, shape, size condition etc. the only way to do it is to talk to him, however using the age thing will confuse him, try the condition post pregnancy etc.

    also consider actually getting back into shape, try Pilates, yoga, gym, swimming, running etc, this will help not only in loosing weight but improve your overall fitness and boost your confidence.

    • There’s no time for me to work out. But yeah.

    • There is always time to work out. Do a plank watching tv, waiting for kettle to boil. 4 cups of coffee a day means 4 x 3 minute planks

    • I get what you’re saying but those small things are not going to help me lose the weight that I need to lose. You’re right, my body was wrecked during pregnancy and I don’t really think I’m ever going to recover from it. I wish I had time to exercise every day, meal plan and eat healthy but my life is so hectic that it’s really difficult, despite my best efforts. Also I often turn to alcohol to ease my nerves which doesn’t help my waistline. I guess I have more problems than just the sex thing haha. Anyways thanks for the advise. I’ll try to implement it.

    • Show All

Most Helpful Girls

  • Honestly, I’d suggest a compromise approach. I know that everyone doesn’t have the same sex drive and that children, careers, and stress all have a definite impact on that. However, as much as he should be sympathetic to your reasons and temper his expectations, it’s not reasonable to never want to meet his needs. You’d be better served in your marriage to compromise and put in some effort in the bedroom at least on a part-time basis. He’ll be more accepting of the situation if you’re making an effort to meet him halfway.

  • Honey. It’s not that you are old. You are overwhelmed, over touched, over tired and not emotionally validated.


    Talk to him. Tell him that you need his help and his support. ❤️


    I wish I had done that sooner. Big regret.


    Our sex life is on fire now. And we have 2 kids. And I’m much older than you.

    • I’m so happy to hear your update. I’m on meds too. Night and day difference. ❤️

Most Helpful Guy

  • Explain that you are overworked and overstressed and too tired. But you should not give up on the wild stuff. You are in a slump and having a baby at home compounds this. Explain that you want to work on yourself for a while. Maybe go for a walk at night or try some yoga while he watches the baby. Clean up your diet and try to become more healthy.

    • Thank you for the MHO. 👍👍👍

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Wait a minute wait one minute you're not even in your Prime yet what do you mean tired old okay this is what you need to do do you have kids need to start exercising you need to start building your body back up because girl you just getting started now you can start taking some vitamins get some more sleep exercise get some sun get some sand for sure but I'm for real you're way too young to even be saying this

  • By giving him the freedom to get what he needs

  • Too old? You just have too much on your plate. How much help are you getting from him?

  • If you are within that 25-29 age group, I think that will be difficult for you to explain, and him to understand. I don't know what 'the wild stuff' is, and tough to give you an objective answer. I think that is unusual for a woman your age, but, perhaps discuss it with a marriage and family counselor

  • You're under 30? That's not too old

  • You're under 30, and you have no sexual energy, Seriously, despite having a baby, and taking on more etc, you should still have some fire in your belly, I've been the father, getting up all through the night to feed and change them, I've been a very hands on dad, I'm always have plenty of energy for sex and passion. You're not decrepit for Christ's sake.

    • The fact that you’re acting like everyone has the same sex drive is kind of scary. Read a book. Google something, and above all else please remember that just because you handled all that and still wanted sex doesn’t mean that I’m required to

    • No I'm not saying that everyone's sex drive is the same, and i apologize for being insensitive, I don't need to google or read a book about it! . But saying you're too old to be wild in the bedroom is a bit over the top. You're not even 30 yet. Maybe you're just thoroughly exhausted, maybe you just need more help, and need some genuine down time! Is your husband supportive, is he doing his fair share of the parenting, and everything else?

    • The “too old” thing was mostly a joke. However I am 10 years older than I was when I met my husband and way less adventurous, for a variety of reasons. My husband does a lot around the house and helps a lot with our daughter, honestly he does. I’m just tired. All the time.

  • You ARE dull. Don't be surprise when he steps out on you.
    If you don't put your man FIRST, your relationship will implode. I guarantee it.

    • Men who think this way are honestly depressing. Take your gaslighting, shit advise elsewhere.

    • @Bean2thousand - Exactly. A whiny dull bitch. Why do they even bother? Oh, I know, they thought they could come here and everybody would tell them how great they are, how right they are, validate them, and pat them on the butt. For gods sakes. No, life is tough, relationships are difficult. You don't have to be 'wild' in bed, but if you don't sex your man he'll wander off looking for one that will. That much I can guarantee.

  • you just have to be white

    • Oddly enough, I’m not!

    • That was a really weird thing to say 🤨

  • You aren't even 30.

    • Thanks, I wasn’t sure.

    • Seem as if it's not the only thing you aren't sure of..

    • Not sure what that’s supposed to mean but ok

    • Show All

  • Just be honest with your feelings, and consider starting an exercise program for your stress.

  • You’re under 30? Poor guy.

  • Life and a career can definitely drain you of your youth but thats why its good to eat healthy and workout to claim the youth that you rightfully deserve!!

    • Happy that you are getting help! 😊

  • I would explain to him that currently you are doing a lot and don't have the energy for intense sex. To say you are too old to have wild sex is insane.

  • Jesus! You are less than 30?

    Lose some weight and do some endurance exercises!

    You are way too young to be that way.

    • First of all I don’t think my weight is the biggest issue here. Plenty of people who are overweight have a very active and healthy sex life. The problem is I’m drained. I do so much in a day that I don’t have time to exercise.

    • It's not normal at your age. You should get some medical advice. And if you are doing too much in a day to take basic care of your health, then you need to rethink what you are doing and/or how you are doing it. That's not healthy.

    • You think there are no people my age who are overweight? Not sure what planet you live on but ok dude. By the way I’m 25 pounds overweight. Not 200.

    • Show All

  • Under 30? Well how wild are you talking about. I get it, been there... but I’m not crazy either... I’d just tell him. I’ve been told that and been like, cool, me too. Lol.

  • Usually from the time your baby is born up until 2-3 years old it’s really hard to find the time to have sex. Once you get past that, it’s much easier to get the energy back to have sex. You’re not too old, you’re just stressed and your energy will come back.

  • You're around my age. So unless you are out of shape you shouldn't be getting too tired to do that. You. ight be tired overall though.

  • i would guess, after 40 is when a person has more difficulty being wild

  • No one is too old to be wild in the bedroom, or kitchen, or back yard, etc. An active sex life takes less work than a good marriage does. All you have to do is want it. Now, IMHO, it almost sounds like you have become disinterested in sex. Then you may need professional help to get over that.

  • At this age?

    • I’m not saying it’s normal for everyone.

    • But saying you're too old for it won't be correct either

    • It’s not incorrect. If I think I’m too old then I’m too old.

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