How do you bring up to your boyfriend that you need more sex?

Question

My boyfriend and I have been quite sexualy open in our relationship, we're open to each others kinks and fantasies, and when we are making love, they're quite a giving lover! But, I've got a much stronger sex drive, than them! So, like, where they're okay with a once or twice a week thing, I would much prefer everyday (or nearly everyday) and multiple times a day! But I'm worried that bringing this up could make them feel a little emasculated... I mean, like, how would you like if you were dating an older woman and she said she was unsatisfied in the bedroom? So I'm looking for some tips and things y'all might give?

Lliam · Accepted Answer

There's something wrong with a guy your age who doesn't want to fuck you at every opportunity.

Since you have an honest relationship, you should just tell him how you feel. Find out what his problem is. Does he find you sexy or what?

Maybe he needs encouragement like for you to wear suggestive clothes or something. Not necessarily role play stuff, but that can be titillating sometimes. Sleep naked. Wear loose, slightly revealing clothes and no underwear around the house. It could be something as simple as a T-shirt that barely covers your butt. Or one of his dress shirts unbuttoned.

Let me ask. Does he think sex has to be a big production with lots of foreplay, pussy eating, etc? Would he be okay rolling over in the morning, spooning behind you, and just slipping you the bone? Can he be spontaneous, like come up behind you when you are washing dishes, lift your shirt and take you right there? Can he bend you over a table or the arm of the sofa and slice you without a lot of lovey dovey foreplay? Not that there isn't a place for wonderful foreplay. But maybe he needs to know that you are also okay with him being a ravenous animal at times.

One personal example is, one particular girlfriend and I would be cuddled on the sofa watching a movie and I'd start fondling her boob through her shirt because I love titties. After a short time, she would say, "I want you inside me." When I asked what it felt like when I fondled her tits, she said "It goes straight to my pussy."

MrOracle · Accepted Answer

Your boyfriend is a man. Be direct with him. Don't be MEAN or ACCUSING or have BLAME in your voice, but just say what you wrote here: you have a high sex drive and would love to have sex more often - and that if he wanted, you would even be fine with several times a day, but would at least like something close to once a day. It wouldn't hurt to add something like "because sex is so good with you and you turn me on so much" because then he won't think he's inadequate. Heck, maybe he's intentionally having less sex with you than he'd like because he was afraid that you'd think he was only with you for the sex!

The point is, with guys, you don't need to butter us up too much or beat around the bush, just SAY IT. Yes, say it in a nice way, without accusing or belittling, but you can just be straight with us and we can take it, and in fact, we prefer it that way. We talk to each other that way, so we're used to being direct.

Siren777 · Accepted Answer

Be open and honest. You won't be able to enjoy life if your needs are not met. Think of it as a mutual thing and he needs to know. It's best to let him know before you resort to something else.

Yolanda987651 · Accepted Answer

Did you try just like trying to turn him on. When home wear lingerie, high heels and just tease him. Just pull you hair bac, get on your knees and suck his soul out

Theo21 · Answer

Just tell him u would like more and if he would be into it if u tease him and he teases you more often. If u turn it into a habit then u will both stay horny and u get what u want

weysally · Answer

you say first bring up that you need more sex to your boyfriend, then later you are using the words them, which is it

JuneLady · Answer

I have a way higher drive than my boyfriend, but he makes up for it with foreplay. I'm very satisfied sexually

ChrisMaster69 · Answer

Once or twice a week is terrible

especially at your age, it should be morning and night etc each day all week.

even when I was in a relationship it was every night.

you need to pretty much tell him, or start seducing him.

get him turned on every night

suggest sharing showers, role play, more kinks

something to get him motivated, sounds like he has gotten lazy

ohshee · Answer

Put something very sexy on you can do it by laying on the couch sitting in a chair laying on the bed it over the chair and just bring it up and see what he has to say about it if he doesn't take you right then and there and I was going to say and we better make another plan but if he doesn't do anything with any of those scenarios I don't have a clue because all four of those would get me going

TheCunningLinguist · Answer

I usually find it's the women. Some are able to keep up with hours of sex on a regular basis for a few months then it steadily falls off and the can't keep up. I don't know what to do about it. Once they realize they can have an orgasm whenever they want, they aren't up to it as often.

kkirk4442 · Answer

Just tell him.

Lilionna · Answer

Honestly I have a similar issue I. That I don't know how to tell my man what I need in the bedroom. He is not big on foreplay and without I am a bit to dry and can’t really get into the sex and enjoy it fully without foreplay but as a guy who doesn’t really need foreplay to have fun he does really understand.

bowenw · Answer

I suggest telling him you find you are getting horny much more often as you get older. It could be you are reaching your sexual peak. Ask him if there are things you can do to get his drive in sync with yours. For example would he mind if you watch some porn together to help set the mood, or if you make a move on him whenever you're horny. You may be able to increase his drive up if you get some new sex toys.

exitseven · Answer

I always found that being direct works the best. Tell him you want to help him unwind after his busy day.

lucyloo76 · Answer

Play with his cock. Or whisper in his ear I'm horny I want sex.

FilmGuy93 · Answer

"Hey. I want your dick inside me more often. No, I'm not high. No, I'm not ovulating. No, asshole, I literally just want you to fuck me more often, you're supposed to want this shit."

MissyJ9876 · Answer

Just tell him straight up. Dude I need more sex and if you can't keep me satisfied im sure (a guy friend of yours) would enjoy doing his job. While he is in shock you say something like but wow (thet guys name) is huge. Make him seriously start to worry

Andres77 · Answer

Walking around naked or just in panties is usually a pretty good signal.

genericname85 · Answer

fucking hell. "i'm worried about breaking it up". why? what's gonna happen? one of 2 things: A: He's happy and has sex with you more. B: he doesn't wanna do it and that means your relationship doesn't work for you. so if it's B, shouldn't you wanna find that out as quickly as possible as to not waste time in a relationship that doesn't make sense? also: do you really wanna be in a relationship where you can't feel comfortable expressing your sexual desires? go and tell him or better yet: initiate more often. if things don't work out, well then that relationship is doomed anway and you gotta think about moving on.

kellytheman · Answer

Just ask him that you need more sex and he probably be up for it. Maybe make a schedule when you like to have sex during the day. You can also dress up very sexy and be seductive when he gets home from work. You could also chain him up to the bed and make him your sex slave just kidding lol