How do you have shower sex?

Question

Everything is so slippery and there's water everywhere and my dick doesn't fit in the faucet :(

detlef · Accepted Answer

"With difficulty." Unless you've got a big ass shower and the room is nice and hot already.

If you have an ordinary shower, you have to point the shower head down, like straight at the drain, and sidle on over to the other end, and also use copious amounts of Mazola (or whatever other choice lubricants you may prefer).

Finally: If you're climaxing in a standing position, it can't be much of a climax.

Shower sex is badly overrated.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Tried it. Felt like I was in a damn circus. My girlfriend kicked me out. I was angry with the shower all day.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

It doesn't fit eh ;)

Well, time to get creative. Do you have a removable showerhead? Turn it to a pulsating stream and let it do wonders do your nether region. Also don't forget to get those no-slip duckie stickers for the tub!

www.amazon.com/.../B00CRO52E6

GhostOnToast · Accepted Answer

There's only one solution, you're going to have to chop your penis off.

MissNowhere · Accepted Answer

LMAOOO. The faucet doesn't fit in my vagina either. I don't know man :/

PeachSunset · Answer

You have tentacles, just attach them to the shower walls. Logic man, fucking logic.

snowangle · Answer

I don't recommend it. You're gonna get stuck in there and end up on TV. :P

sjoes006 · Answer

LOL your dick doesn't fit in the faucet? 😊

vishna · Answer

XD oh Squidward Buy a bigger faucet you animal!

9mfeo · Answer

You have to train yourself to stand the pain. It's a long process. It could take you years. Keep trying. Your shower love will surely wait.

KDA20 · Answer

Flip flops with grips on soles and take the faucet off maybe the hole behind might big enough though make sure edges are smooth, we don't want any accidents caused by over eagerness.

ISaidFuryNotFurry · Answer

Don't worry, you are still sleeping. All you need to do is... fit your dick in the faucet and you will wake up. *Evil laughter*

BelleGirl21 · Answer

"And my dick doesn't fit" lolol *sigh*  Sorry what was the question?

VirginiaBeachBum · Answer

You are NOT supposed to have sex with the faucet. That's what the removable shower head is for, and it might get jealous.

cinderelli · Answer

You put it in there before erection..

archiz · Answer

interesting what have you been up to recently man :p
At first I thought you were talking about shower sex with a girl so I thought hell yea, things apparently worked out with that girl you bought flower to xD

ClariceOwen23 · Answer

Lolwut?

ConsultantIsBack · Answer

Shower sex is overrated in my opinion. I just like to shower together after banging, it's like post-sex shower sex.

douride2 · Answer

Then get a bigger spout! lmao hahahaha

OrdinaryGentleman · Answer

hmm... Have you tried the glacial setting? It should shrink

TheBraveLion · Answer

Just use these: Hahah xD

llorando · Answer

Your totally wrong, it doesn't go if the faucet, it's appose to go in the drain, that way their is no mess to clean up afterwards as everything goes down the drain and into the sewer system.