How to get back out there and start having sex again?

Question

It’s been almost 4 years for me and I’m kind of scared to do it again.

When I actually was having sex, I didn’t do it so much and I always clutch up out of habit, being new to it I never really got that comfortable feeling. So after not doing it for so long now, I still feel new to it.

Will it feel like how it felt when I lost my virginity? I tried a dildo a few years ago and it hurt to insert so I stopped using it that way so for the past few years I only been using it to rub my clit, I never insert

Losalt · Accepted Answer

To be on the safe side go to a gynecologist.
If they don't find anything wrong try inserting the dildo slowly, if it gets uncomfortable just stop and hold it there till you're able to relax enough for it to not be uncomfortable.
Perhaps get a smaller one.
Just get some experiences of it being full that isn't scary, so a guy won't be too overwhelming when you choose to try that.
And when you do ride him so you'll be in control.
Just rest in your knees on either side of him and try sitting down on him at your own pace when *you* are ready.
Squeeze and milk him and just in general explore that feeling.

You might want to just explore him a bit without having sex first, just be reminded of just how soft he can be etc.

You'll get there, don't worry. 😊

DaveJord · Accepted Answer

I would say sex is like anything else the more yo practice the better you will get at it. But given the time you have taken if you are in a better mental space then sex will be 10 times better for you. Its healthy to be nervous but the second go around you become more and more comfortable and if its the right guy then you will be fine trust me.

How do get out there, were your a women scope out some men and start talking to them. Its not hard, simple hi how are you is good way to start.

IAteTwoFullHams · Answer

You should really talk to a doctor about vaginismus. It's a medical condition, and it's entirely treatable.

EricWeston · Answer

It's been a few years for me too, and sometimes I wonder if I still know what I'm doing in bed, lol.

I'm not too worried about it because one day I used my son's skateboard (I hadn't been on a skateboard in over 20 years) and my body just took over. I was doing tricks and skating around like I had never stopped skating. I kinda feel like sex is similar.

PJH359 · Answer

If a dildo was hurting you then I would imagine a man will too. Maybe you should use your fingers for a while instead? Sex is like riding a bike. It’s gonna feel really nice once you get going with someone. I think you’re perhaps having a little anxiety so I hope you have sex with someone who you’ll feel very relaxed with and uninhibited.

RealMarek · Answer

Just be really careful and consider waiting until you have a boyfriend who loves you.

kellytheman · Answer

Well it might be not exactly like losing your virginity but it might hurt like it since you have inserted anything for awhile. You just gonna go out with your girls and dress up sexy like a little black dress or skirt and maybe show off some skin and guys will show up to get to know and flirt with them you get to choose if there are worthy enough to have sex with you. You might want to use some lube so when you have sex it won't hurt as much and he can slide in eaiser or if you do use a dildo it be the same thing.