How to get over a long term fling?

[mandajesspanda]

I met this guy in high school (in Missouri) and we were good platonic friends for about 3 or 4 years until we decided to have sex and after that we just couldn’t stop lol. He moved to Houston a few months after we first met then randomly my family decided to move to Austin in 2014 so me and him would take turns making the drive to see one another for hookups.. Anyway he moved to LA in 2021 and I moved to Dallas and now we take flights. Our last hookup was last week when I flew to LA to see him and now that i’m back home i’m kinda ready to end things with him because durning sex he was doing a lot of intimate things he’s never done like locking hands with me, kissing my back a lot more, cuddling me a lot, being super affectionate and gentle during anal and even asked to shower with me even though we didn’t have sex again we just talked the entire time while showering….. It brought up the crazy feelings I have for him … I tried to tell him how I felt before he even moved to LA and he told me he only see’s me as a good friend which is fine but I just hate that my feelings are now involved and I don’t want it to ruin everything especially the fun in things. So basically today when we were texting, I told him my feelings are still there and how I can’t do this anymore and he just stopped responding… I feel sad because we really were good friends and talked about everything even after we crossed the line. But now that my feelings are involved i’m jealous now that he’s out in LA surrounded by so many pretty women etc and I really don’t want to leave him alone but I also don’t want to get hurt/forgotten. I’ve never been the type of girl to give guys ultimatums or manipulate them into getting what I want and I believe if a guy wants to he would.. So how do I get over this? I’ve been crying all day trying not to double text etc. & no I don’t want to sleep with anyone else just yet…

[laurieluvsit]

I feel so bad for you, I know the hurt and the pain so well.

The best thing you can do right now is let some time go by and see what happens. I know it is hard but what you need to understand is that what someone can not have, they begin to want. Right now he know he can have you at the drop of a penny. If you stop contact, he will begin to think of all the things he liked about you like you are doing with him and then if it is meant to be it will be but don't chase him not, that will only make things worse. And give him any clues that you have to have him or anything like that.

Anyway, I hope it eventually works out for you so much.

Best wishes

TRUE LOVE, is it ever attainable?

[Mary087]

I’m scared to catch feelings now for a guy I’m hooking up with.. gee I’m so sorry that happened. It’s easy to get attached with someone you connect with physically, although for me it also takes an emotional connection but I don't know if him and I have that yet but we seemed to kind of vibe naturally the first time we met in person and hooked up but I feel like you just need to realize it wasn’t meant to be& he’s the one missing out on you for not giving you a chance given how much you care about him and have went out of your way for him. Sad.

[ravagesavage]

Wow! I ain't trying to read that novel, it's too long to read. Can you summarize it?

[mandajesspanda]

LOL how do you get over a 13 year fling?

[ravagesavage]

Just find someone better, but that's gonna take some time so... Just find things to do that'll keep your mind off him to the point that it'll make you get over him. But spending time with other people is the fastest way. Just keep this in mind, you'll always find someone better he was pretty much your test run.

[888theGreat]

Do you see the problem with having sex like animals?

[Avicenna]

Time heals more than anything else

[Iron_Man]

Just be computer penpals