I accidentally made my boyfriend more self conscious about his penis than he already is how do I help him fix this?

So at the beginning of our relationship I had no reaction to the size of his penis when we first started messing around. Which I typically don’t have a reaction when I see a penis. Am I supposed to? Anyways this made him question why and if I have seen or had sex with someone who had a bigger penis than him. I said yes but I also told him that his was perfect for me and the biggest just hurt and overall was not a good experience. But he didn’t believe me when I said it was perfect and he said that I was just telling him what he wanted to hear even though I thought it was perfect when I saw it for the first time I just didn’t voice it because I am typically awkward when it comes to sexual situations because of bad experiences. So now he’s continuously in his head about this because I explained to him why the biggest I’ve had hurt. He now wants to hit the same spot that made me very uncomfortable and in pain and he feels like if he doesn’t his penis won’t be sufficient enough for me even though I told him it would be. He’s also afraid to have sex now because of this. I’m not sure what to do or who to talk to about this because I don’t think this is a very normal situation. Any input would be greatly appreciated on how to make him believe that his penis will be good enough for me.
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AI Bot Choice

Superb Opinion
  • It's a difficult one. I'm too honest and told my boyfriend that he has a nice size penis but my ex was bigger. That didn't go down well but he isn't insecure so wasn't an issue. I have been with guys who thought they had big dicks when really they didn't. Iv wanted to tell them but never did.

    Your boyfriend is very insecure and immature and inexperienced. Just be strait with him... their are a billion dicks in this world and they're all different... its how he uses it not how big it is.

Most Helpful Girl

  • You must not have said anything about your previous partner’s size. Knowing how self-conscious men are about their size.

    The best thing you can do now is show off how you can’t get your hands and lips off his penis. Just make him feel like he’s all you want and that he’s the best you’ve had. And show with your actions that he’s all you need and crave.

Most Helpful Guys

  • No , this is abnormally self-conscious. He needs to get therapy, or better yet just grow the F up. I'm well-endowed but I'm still not stupid enough to think I'm the biggest guy on the planet. I'd also say anyone who needs a woman to comment upon first seeing his junk probably doesn't have junk worth commenting on. It's not your job to make him stop being a child. If he can't move on, you should. This spells problems down the road.

  • I wish more guys would embrace the fact that being told by the woman you love that your penis is smaller -- in some cases, much smaller -- than other guys she's dated in the past, is one of the most beautiful things you'll ever hear. If it were really that big a problem for her, she wouldn't say anything; she'd just stop dating you.

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What Girls & Guys Said

7 17
  • You didn’t do anything wrong, he’s just insecure. But if you’re being honest with yourself, he probably is insecure for a reason lol.

  • My boy needs therapy. His lack of confidence is not your doing.

  • you didn't make him self conscious. he is self conscious and he was going to be regardless. he is insecure about his penis. that isn't your fault and there is little you can do about it. it's something he has to get over on his own.

    you've done your part to reassure him. if he can't accept what he is and find happiness in what he is then that's on him.

  • This is a “him” issue, not a “you” issue. You’ve already given him enough information to feel better about this. There’s really nothing more you can say.

    He really was wrong to even ask you this question in the first place, with him being this insecure about his size.

    You didn’t mention how long you’ve been together, but if this continues and is causing problems in your sex life, you might have to part from him due to being sexually incompatible.

  • Oops, we have to be careful of that fragile male ego and insecurity, but never mind. Just make sure you keep on having lots of sex with him and be very obvious about your enjoyment. Hopefully he will relax about it soon.

    • Yes. Because it’s not like women erupt into a volcano of tears and inhale chocolate when their crush tells them they look “fat.”

    • @Agagagagaga Tsunami is the new volcano

  • A lot of guys are fuck up about their penis size. You didn't cause this it was there before you. You can tell him he's fine but it's up to him to get over it in the end.

  • Not your fault, it was a stupid thing for him to ask. People should never ask questions where the truth might hurt them.

  • This is not your fault. He asked, you answered. He needs to get over this himself.

  • You've done everything you need to do. You can't change his opinion of himself. Just keep having good sex with him, showing your enjoyment. He may eventually get the idea that his penis is good enough. If he doesn't, there's nothing you can do about it.

  • Start lying about how good he is.

  • Tell him to get a Penis Pump and Penis Extender (THEY WORK!)

    Also tell him to do JELQS.

    I'm now so big after a JELQ pump session that I can almost reach 9 inches and most chics can't even wrap their hand around it.

  • He is insecure and immature. It is his problem, not yours.

  • The same thing happened with a girlfriend I had. She said my penis was smaller than with other men she had slept with.

    I think it's fine. You were just being honest. My ex just told me that my erection still have her very good orgasms.

    Feel free to follow me/ DM me if you'd like to discuss.

  • He needs to get over it. He sounds insecure. How is the sex with him? Does he get u to an orgasm? Maybe tell him that you are satisfied with sex with him if it is in fact true. How often are you two having sex? Maybe go for round 2 or 3 with him?

  • Its not fixable, but he never should have asked that question in the first place.

  • my input? talk to a sexual therapist asp before both your guys relationship gets ruined.

  • I can probably find plenty of anecdotes from women saying that big penises can hurt, but he probably doesn't want to believe them. If he refuses to accept that bigger =/=better, you can't convince him otherwise.

  • STOP talking about other dicks! This is the guy equivalent of telling a girl she looks fat in that dress.

  • I think it's not your fault, he asked, you answered honestly and assured him, if he didn't like the outcome, maybe he shouldn't have asked in first place.

  • The male preoccupation with penis size and their insecurity about it is nonsensical. Most of us do not orgasm from penetration alone and size is largely irrelevant. Yet somehow, they believe the opposite. It makes no sense.

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