Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health 
I asked about this months ago, but I want to write about it now. I asked if it was the new standard for women to cum from oral before sex and then the guy has sex fast to get off. I'm not hating on the idea for other people, but for me I just don't like it. I don't like the sentiment. I'm the one and done orgasm type.
I get that there are also couples who do this, who have all different ways of doing it. From short sex to long sex, and lots of variances with foreplay, both before and after sex...But for me:
To be blunt about it I don't see why a guy like this should get more than a blowjob from me.
I don't like how guys who go down on me first may think "Well, at least she O'ed from this" and then be expecting sex anyway. Because I've heard and even read some of them say that.
It's not that it's his responsibility to make me orgasm. I know it's mine.
But I don't want him to get comfortable with the idea that he can please me this way. He gets off from sex, and I won't... IMHO If orgasming from oral is so awesome, then he should be happy with just getting off from that too.
To be honest I think it takes a lot of nerve for guys to ask for sex, if they get women off this way and it's not a mutual agreement. Like it's just the standard or what he expects should happen after he gets me off.
So for guys like that, do not ask me for sex, please.
And don't get me wrong, I don't know how to solve the orgasming from sex problem lots of women or even some men have at all. And ofc some guys can't even get off from bjs!
I was just saying this bothers me but it's not like I have a solution unfortunately. I wanted to vent since lots of people say this is standard now, because it's not a standard I want or like at all.
What Girls & Guys Said
9 18First of all, I totally understand that when you get off from oral first, moving on to sex that's not doing anything for you will make you feel like a piece of meat.
I don't think there is a "standard", as you put it. It sounds like you don't talk with your partner (s) enough or maybe you are and they don't listen. I think your problems could be resolved if you simply explained how you feel and told him what you want. There are a lot a jerks out there, I know, but I think *most* guys actually *want* their partners to be satisfied and happy. I'll be you they are simply doing their best based on their experience with other partners, and they need to learn about *you*.
The fact that you see everything about sex as quid pro quo ("I don't see why a guy like this should get more than a blowjob from me") is also part of the problem. My advice would be to find a guy you really love and who loves you, a guy that's willing to stick around long enough to learn you and your body, a guy that you are so into that you *want* to please him without any strings attached and in whatever way he loves the most, and who will gladly put that to the side to do the exact same thing for you. Until you do, you are cheapening it for him as well as for yourself. Sex is so much more awesome than the motions you're going through.
I totally agree. I'm telling him exactly what I want. And I actually <3 giving bjs srsly, so he wouldn't be denied pleasure if I did just that for him.
Sex is about mutual pleasure. How you get there is something that you and your partner work out together as you go about the process of developing and strengthening your sexual relationship. Just keep in mind that guys aren't mind reader's, so you will need to speak up and discuss this with your sexual partners beforehand to avoid hurt feelings or misunderstandings. Most men just want to please their lovers! Also keep in mind that intercourse-only orgasms for women are the most elusive, challenging, and difficult to achieve; this is why oral and other methods are so popular. So cut your man a little slack if he doesn't get you there right away. It's great that you know what you want and like, just make sure he knows what you like, and that you find out what he likes as well.
I agree I think foreplay is foreplay which leads to even more raunchy sex right? i just followed you and you accepted, loved your question on dirty talk too by the way.
Don't know if you could help me practise that hehe if you're interested? ;-) can't seem to message you though...
I love it, mmm, double orgasming :D
its my way to orgasm my girlfriend, but i clear every man have different strength. when i start intercourse i play very little oral and then honestly i cum in near about 10 minute and i know very well she have not orgasm in that little time but i do not pull out my penis from vagina after cum and i start loving my girlfriend by kissing touching nipples in same sex position and honestly my penis start erecting again may be in 5 to 10 min because my all concentration is on nipples and i again ready for intercourse then after this erection my cum is in my hand or in my control, then i fuck her near about 1 hour and after every half hour i feel she orgasm because she hold me tight and after her 2nd orgasm she beg me please hurry up cum fast becz iam happy u give me a real taste of sex and now i really feel tired then i fuck very very fast her and lastly i cum with lot of happiness. i never orgasm my girlfriend in oral.. some have no believe me but i already ask every man have different strength.