I get extremely turned on by this girl I like, we are just friends. Am I a pervert? How do I deal with it?

[Anonymous]

There is this girl whom I am really attracted to, we are just friends atm. She is quite pretty with a nice body and everytime I spend time with her I get extremely turned on. I can't help noticing her butt, thighs and all. She also dresses nothing provocative, just skinny jeans and tees, I don't know why I get so turned on. I have known some attractive women in my life but have never lusted after them.
After spending a day with her when I go home, I have to jerk off thinking about her otherwise I can't go to sleep.
There a time during the initial stages of our friendship I wasn't lusting after her, the lust came in after a year of knowing each other or so.
Am I a pervert or is this normal? How do I stop my lusting after her?

[Wade8888]

This is pretty much normal.

I had crushes on girls at church who were "friends" but really had no interest in me, and I secretly masturbated to visual thoughts of them sometimes, and begged God to help me stop too, but it mostly didn't go away until I left that church a few years later.

But pretty much every time I saw these girls ti was like, "My God the woman is perfect. I'd give anything to date/fuck her." Which the True Creator rebuked me for idolatry in one case because I liked that girl TOO much.

Which is a sin, but I guess it can't be helped, so I'd say you're no worse than the average man, and the fact you admit you have this problem and don't want to be "lusting" means you are better than average man.

[B2281]

It's rather normal. But here is the question I have for you. Do you only see yourself lusting for her or can you see yourself in a serious relationship with her?

[Asker]

I think so, at first I was just in love with her, the lust came along later as we spent more time together. She refuses to hook up by the way.

[B2281]

Don't go for just a hookup. If you genuinely like her try to earn her affection. If she asks you if it's because you have sexual feelings for her be honest, but if it's more than just sex tell her that. And tell her that you would like to find out if it's a feeling that is deeper than simply feeling lustful for her.

[Asker]

Thanks for the insight

[B2281]

You're welcome. And again, if you really like her avoid being sexual with her. Find out if there is potential for building a real relationship.

[BackAgain602]

You're physically and sexually attracted to her, nothing abnormal about that. And you're not a pervert; you've got intense feelings for her, and you're having to bottle them up when you're around her. That's tough.
Unless she's taken already, you should just tell her that you have strong feelings for her and see where things go from there.

[slatyb]

30+? You seems a bit old to not understand this. Of course it's normal. Why don't you ask her if she's interested in a deeper relationship?

[devil_8888]

It’s quite normal. Have you ever thought of sharing your feelings for her?

[Asker]

Yeah I have tried hooking up, I just got a big fat NO from her. So this is how I deal with it.

[devil_8888]

Did you try hooking up on a date or what?

[Asker]

No we are just really close friends and she is quite comfortable with me. So one I just straight out asked her to have sex. Dumb I know.

[inquisitive173]

You want to fill her with that huge sticky load you've saved for her. Make your move and drain the ache out of those balls. You know she's probably tight as hell. I had a few like that and we just got high and the panties drop right off.