I hate anal but my boyfriend loves it?

My boyfriend loves anal , i tried but i can not do it , it hurts like hell. It's any chanse that he will betray me with another that does anal?
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Because of porn I think a lot of guys believe that they can just stick it up there. I think people that are interested in doing anal should educate themselves on how to do it right first preferably with their partner.

    As for your question, if you are uncomfortable doing it then you shouldn't do it. A guy who values his girls' opinions more than his own will be miserable because he would be suppressing his needs for hers all the time. It's more about drawing boundaries and respecting what your partner is ok with and not ok with.

    The person you had anal with didn't know what they were doing, so considering this, are you interested in learning how to do it right with your partner? If the answer is still no then don't. If he can't respect that and cheats than dump him-which I know isn't easy to do.

    Another thing I believe should addressed is that there is this belief out there that if you can't do this or that for your woman or man then it is justified if they go out and cheat. A lot of people don't question it, but that is manipulation. You are using someone's fears to manipulate them-it is blackmail. So the question you should ask yourself is do you want people to manipulate your fears to bend your will, or will you remain categorical about what you believe is right for you?

    Of course if you choose the more difficult path it will mean accepting that you will loose manipulative men you might have come to love, but it will also mean that you will be screening for people who can respect what are you uncomfortable with. I hope this helps.

  • You know, he should love you enough to understand how you feel about anal and should have some sympathy to care about your feeling more than he cares about his. Besides anal sex is a way that gay dudes pleasure each other, unless he is gay, he should rather do vaginal as it would be more pleasant for you. he should be less selfish and self centered

    • True that. The more of your answers I see, the more faith I get in humanity! Lol.

    • Thanks, really appreciate your praise of my opinions. Can we be friends 😊

Most Helpful Girls

  • At least you tried but if you don't like it, tell him you hate it and it hurts you, cause if he loves you he wouldn't want to hurt you. She shouldn't need to do it just to please him or to keep him, if he loves you he will understand you and stay...

  • If it hurts like hell, he is doing it wrong. Lube, foreplay and lots of stimulation - it should feel great and kinky).

  • If he likes anal so much ask him if you can finger his ass and see how he likes it ;)

    • for some reason, it's a common misconception that this would deter anyone. It really won't.. If a girl required me to let her finger my butt while I had sex with hers, my response would be "hey, it's your finger.."

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • ... ahh... another of those questions of refusal. Explain to him what you are going through AND offer to do something else other than that. Most girls always just refuse without explanation and without compromise and wonder why he went elsewhere. If you do both things and he is still adamant on anal or goes outside for it...
    well... you know what to do, because you searched for a compromise and he remained rigid.

  • you should ask him that

    • I think we all know the answer already. After someone's man? Spread your cheeks girls. It has worked for millennia.

  • a chance? sure, but not a very big one. Finding a girl who wants NSA anal sex is basically impossible. Hell, finding a girl who wants anal, at all, is hard enough as it is.

  • Time will tell.

    • I won't tell baby, you can trust me ;)

    • sorry, had multiple tabs open and switched to wrong gag post but if he loves you he won't

  • He may get dissapointed, but unless he is a shallow jerk, he'd think your worth not getting anal.

  • You should make him understand that it hurts you like hell.

    He won't want to force it if he knows it makes you uncomfortable, very very uncomfortable.

    If he does, then he's a ******* and you should kick him to the curb.

  • Sorry I can't help because I don't get the fascination with anal. My wife doesn't like giving head and I have not and will not betray her for someone that loves cock in their mouth. So I assume it's similar for anal. If he really likes you he will respect your preference and stay faithful.

  • Use lots of lube and if its still unpleasant then tell him no. You have that right

  • he's in the process of transitioning to guys.

    sorry.

  • Try to shove dildo to his ass so he know how it feels

  • More lube. Relax more. Don't be to stressed. U will see it feels a lot easier.
    I took one yesterday and am still sore. A good feeling tho. It was hurting like mad at first. His was huge. Can't believe I took it.

  • I don't get why guys these days expect their girl to be OK with Anal, Blow Jobs or even Hand jobs...

    You're a petty person if you demand those! And if you don't respect you partners wishes!

  • Ahh it's not for everyone. Just talk to him. Honesty is the best policy & if he loves you, he will understand. I've never done anal with a female but I'm willing too maybe one of these days.

  • IF so good riddance; it is a totally unnatural act that has serious health ramifications; the sooner you stop doing it, the safer you will be from them.