I hate anal, but my boyfriend loves it?

So recently my boyfriend and I tried anal, he ended up loving it and I hated it. It wasn't painful or anything like that, but there definitely wasn't much pleasure from it either. Now he keeps asking me to do it again, but I keep telling him I didn't like it. He says if it wasn't painful that I should at least try it once more, I disagree.

What do you think? Should I just do it again? Is there some kind of compromise we could come to? Any other advise?
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Most guys ruin a woman for anal sex because all the guy can think about is getting his cock in her ass. Well guys, how about you taking a dildo and put it in your ass and see how you like it!
    I have learned how to get a woman to enjoy anal sex. You have to drop the selfish crap and consider her. First, have lube. Plenty of it. The first time you decide to do it only enter the head of your cock in her ass. No more. Slowly, and I mean slowly slide your cock back out all the way then put it back in her ass and go no deeper than the head of your cock. Do that for a couple minutes then make love to her. The next time use a lot of lube just as the first time. When you slide your cock in her ass again enter very slow. Go maybe, and I mean maybe a quarter or half inch deeper that the first time. After a couple minutes stop. Each time you have anal sex with her very gradually go a little deeper. Use plenty of lube.
    Take your time, be patient and eventually you will be able to add anal sex to your sex life. If you get in a hurry to bury your cock in her ass you are going to hurt her, she is not going to want to do this anymore and you just ruined a woman's potential for enjoying this. When properly done the women I have broke in with this do like it.
    Your woman is not a porn star. She is most likely not used to anal sex so it needs to be introduced very gradually. Think about it.

    • I mean it wasn't painful at all for me.

    • Even if there was no pain anal sex needs to be introduced slowly, gently and over time. When done properly you can massage your clit while he is in your ass. One day down the road if you ever decide to do a threesome you will be ready for it. Both of my past girlfriends (one was my wife) that enjoyed anal also wanted to do a threesome. They said it really felt awesome having two guys in them at the same time. I realize this is not for everyone and it took a little time the first time watching another guy's cock in my woman. My experience is people in their late 30s & 40s are more likely to do a MMF as they have reached the time in their life where their attitude about sex has matured and they realize it for what it is. An erotic encounter. After you have had sex thousands of times you start asking yourself, "what else is left?". Both of my ex's that did a MMF threesome said they really enjoyed it. Both also learned to enjoy anal sex.

    • This is great advice. Very well said! Bravo for you! Very accurate. Its exactly what my guy did for me and I will always love and appreciate him for it. The incredible Pleasure of receiving anal sex, whether guy or gal is a process, not an event. A mental block and physical barriers can be desensitized and overcome with a willingness to open the mind further than what it is, and take baby steps both mentally and physically. Bravo.

  • I've always said you need to try everything 3 times.

    Time 1 will be awkward and probably won't go well.

    Time 2 you have the awkwardness out of the way and this is when you figure out how it's done properly and what feels good and what doesn't.

    Time 3 is when you both know pretty much how it's going to go with no awkwardness. This will be the determining do we drop it for good or make it a regular part of our sex lives time.

    Obviously this is my own opinion and yiu should just do what you want. If you feel there should be some kind of compromise suggest you fuck him in the ass.

Most Helpful Girls

  • No. Don't do it again. Don't do it again until you BOTH want it. Sex is a two way road.

    I've been in the same position as yourself. I never wanted to try anal, my boyfriend insisted. I ended up trying it for his sake because I felt like that may be a better choice instead of putting up with his constant nagging. Well.. it went not so well. Not painful per se but incredibly uncomfortable. In a month or two after that, I decided to brave the storm and try it again as he continued to nag and tell me that many girls cum from anal so it's 'just a matter of time+practice' till I can get that. I tried again- same story. I basically had a panic attack during actual anal so. Nope. I've drawn the line at no more anal and though he STILL begs, 2 years later, I'm gonna stay strong this time.
    (Which you should, too. Anal, especially, is not something the receiver will enjoy if they're not fully interested.)

  • Often new things get pleasurable with further experiences and repetition. I'de give it a go a few times before I decided it was absolutely not for me. The nerves in the anal area tend to wake up and take notice over time. You have only been initially exposed, not really had a full experience yet of all it can be. Plus he was a novice too. Experience helps a lot.

    But if you are opposed to giving it even a few tries, then stick to your 'no'.
    (Fyi- once 'awakened', anal orgasms are more intense and much easier to flow and just keep flowing. Its amazing if ya decide to go there)

    • I guess this makes sense but at the same time I just dread trying it again.

    • Then it appears as though you have answered your own question.

  • I always say compromise unless the act brings you no pleasure, or if it brings you pain or discomfort. You COULD try it again but change it up where maybe he tries stimulating you better, see if that helps, but if not then you're not obligated to do anything that does nothing for you.

  • Wait until marriage for sex, I know that it's old fashioned but it's worth it and a man should not ask or want that, it's not sanitary. Sorry to be blunt, but you deserve the best.

    • We've already had sex like a million times. Soo...

    • Sex isn't unsanitary if you ARE sanitary. Sex is part of life... what I think is unsanitary is anal..

    • Why?

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What Girls & Guys Said

9 21
  • no, if you don't want to do it thats that, he's lucky enough he gets sex.

  • Don't try it! If it makes you feel uncomfortable then
    He should respect that. If he respects you...

  • If the roles were reversed and he felt this way about something you liked, would you pressure him or understand?

    The answer to this is for you to know and that should be your answer to him asking you "one more time".

  • If you don't want to do it, then don't, he needs to respect your boundaries. Plus, vaginal is always better and always feels best, he should be thinking of how to better please you, not himself so much.

  • perhaps you try one more time. especially if it wasn't painful. but i'd make a deal with him. if you try again and still don't enjoy then he agrees to never ask you again

  • I hate Alan, but my girlfriend loves him

  • If it didn't hurt tell him you'll agree to one more time but if you still don't enjoy it, you don't want to hear about it again.

  • Tell him if he wants it... you Fk him in the ass first. Tit for tat.

  • He's pressuring you, i think it's disgusting. I hope my future long term partner has no interest in it because I don't want to have to do it. Plus i'm a little too thick there anyway.

    Don't let him have it, you aren't obligated to do it. Tell him that it isn't enjoyable at all for you, you only done it to please him but you hate it. if he actually cares about you then he wouldn't wanti

  • do what you wanna do.

  • Get a strapon and ask him to try it.

  • Don't like it don't do it.

  • You could always try "well since you like it so much, let me peg you to find out why it's so exciting, then next time it'll be your turn" probably will bring the discussion to an end.

  • Dump him

  • Don't blame you , anal has never appealed to me at all !!

  • Creep, tell him to go fuck his friends in the ass, if he wants anal so bad

    • Hahahahaha agreed

  • You don't want my opinion. I love anal too.

    • Haha. No I do want your opinion, that's why I asked.

    • Use more lube and learn to like it. If you aren't getting much out of it then you need to do the old switcharoo. He does you straight until you cum, then he pulls out and drills your ass. Problem solved.

    • Well it wasn't painful so I don't think the lube was an issue at all. I guess that makes sense. Ok.

  • Dump him.

    • A compromise would mean both sides have made concessions your answer wouldn't be a compromise for the guy.

    • @Josht13 it's called a sarcastic joke because I know the guy isn't compromising...

    • your answer was one word, there is no chance of perceiving it as sarcasm.

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