I have a feeling that men think of women as a toy nothing more. Am I right?

[Anonymous]

Am I just a toy?

[MrOracle]

You're wrong, and your exactly right.

As hard as it is for many women to believe (and I don't necessarily mean you, Asker), men actually want things in a woman in order to want to be in a relationship with her. A lot of women insist that men need to just accept her and her past and her baggage because SHE wants to be with HIM, but that's not how relationships work. Men also get to decide.

A part of this process is that men will look at a woman, and spend a short while getting to know a bit about her, and then they put her into one of these categories:

A small number of women both can offer him the things he's looking for in a relationship partner AND is attractive to him, and thus at least start out in the "possible relationship" category.

A much larger percentage of women are physically attractive enough that he'd like to bang her, but don't quality as having relationship potential. THESE women ARE more-or-less seen as sex toys, it's true.

And roughly half, on average, the man isn't interested in at all, for anything.

---

Now, here's what's REALLY important for women to understand, but that most women not only don't understand, but refuse to learn:

The more attractive the man is ("attractive" being a combination of looks, popularity, money, success, status, confidence, etc.), the higher his standards are for a woman to meet "relationship potential" status. If a woman is going for a Top 5% man (and most women are), that guy is going to have thousands of women who want him, and he's only going to consider women that HE feels are 10/10 to even TEST for "relationship compatibility." And much like the trails for Navy SEALS, most 10/10 women won't pass selection. Women who are a 9/10 or below don't even get invited to test.

This does NOT mean that those really attractive, high-status men won't FUCK her, even if she's a 5/10 at best, but all she'll ever be to him is a living sex toy, and the moment she starts to become a hassle, he'll disappear into the ether, a ghost.

Too many women believe that their status is at whatever level of men will bang them, but that's completely wrong. Their status is at whatever level of man will COMMIT to them - i. e., the kind of man she can KEEP. She can go from high-status man to high-status man as a sex toy, but that not only doesn't raise her value, it lowers it, and just proves she's batting out of her league, because she's not able to KEEP those men.

But this rule applies to men at all levels. If a man is an 8/10, and the women is a 6/10, then she's likely going to be treated like a sex toy by him, because she's allowing herself to believe that by sleeping with him, she's now become an 8/10 herself, but that's not the way it works. Men can separate sex from love, and are perfectly happy to enjoy sex without needing to get emotionally involved.

If having a relationship commitment matters to you, then you need to be honest with yourself about what your level is, and what kind of men you can KEEP, because if you keep shopping outside your price range, then being just a sex toy is your future.

[SteveSmith1985]

This depends entirely on "which specific man".

There are absolutely some men who think of women that way.

But as a general statement about "men"... the answer is "no".

Most men don't see women that way, and the one's who do... you're best to avoid.

I think the fact that YOU feel (worry?) that this man sees you as nothing but a toy, is a problem.

So one way or another, you've got to figure-out whether or not he sees you that way (because if he does... you should be aware of that... and if he doesn't, then it's FUCKED that you're left thinking he does).

Depends on if he's a decent man or not

[LazerBean]

It depends on what sort of men you associated with.

[dustybiker]

Maybe it’s the type of men you are attracted to?

[ohsheeT]

I think women are absolutely beautiful gorgeous smart confident they make the world go round now there is a time and a place for everything I'm not going to say I think of them as a toy no I would like to have a lover that wants me to use her like a toy or like anything else but there's a moment in time where that should be acceptable and it means nothing more than we're going to please each other or at least I'm going to please you

[OlderAndWiser]

I have a feeling that you think all men are alike and have the same thoughts. Am I right?

[ushagomez]

No. We are an enigma, a challenge, difficult to understand, but so unbelievably desirable….

It is your boy who is your toy…..

[Sandeeppingping]

No we don't, but you specifically yes you are just a toy

[summiter]

I hope not... some guys can be rude and crude and should not feel this way

[NathanDavis]

those are not men... those are douchebags

very different things

[mrmonogamous]

You’re wrong. Some women want to be toys, or at least toyed with. That actually prevented me from getting into relationships years ago. Thank God I’m married and don’t have to worry about that crap.

[20yearsolder]

You can't categorize us all under one umbrella. Definitely some guys are that way. Some of us aren't

[Sixgunsound]

I don’t think all men think of all women as toys. What I do think is that men will rise to the standards set by women, so if you act like a toy, he will treat you like one.

[HighValue]

Nope.

[Dargil]

They have been raised wrong. Is sexual intimacy important? Yes. But it is a way of conveying love. Even if it is with someone I just met, when I deliver oral sex, it is an expression of love. It's just the way I feel. I want her to feel loved. It doesn't differ from the love of my life or someone I met at the beach. I am transformed by it.

[FilmGuy93]

Most men do not think way about women, no.

[Rockstarrrrr]

Oh stop you're not a toy... You're a perfect second class human don't think less of yourself xD

[HighlyQuestionable]

I can't speak for other men, but I most definitely don't think of women that I am "interested in" as "Toys".

[Nikki1989]

Well some men, obviously.

[Ironic_Method]

You are what you make yourself to be. Some women prefer to be a toy. Others, not so much.

[britishbby]

No ur so so so fucking wrong some men might but if ur in a relationship I bet u a lot he adoresssss the fuck outa u

[Havthrills]

Nope. Not at all. Women are more than that. Way more

[Keepitreal007]

If you’re feeling that way maybe your letting them Treat you that way. 🤷‍♂️

[altaboy]

No, with the right guy you are a potential life partner and best friend. That's the good part. That is the whole point of dating. I suppose it seems like many men don't think about that.