I love my boyfriend but he doesn't like having sex or kissing me what should I do?

Me and my boyfriend are very much in love and are even moving in together in are first home soon.

All he ever wants to do is cuddle. he's amitted he finds kissing unhygienic and doesn't like being kissed by anyone.

We do usually kiss during sex because it's just awkward if we don't but you can tell he's not really into it and doesn't really know what he's doing.

We've only ever been with each other sexually so neither of us have much experience.

He works two jobs and ever since he got sciatica he's kinda lost all passion in bedroom. He just seems disinterested and would rather watch TV which really hurts. I always have to ask for sex and he'll either say he's too tired or another day when that days comes I'll never know.

We planned on having sex last night. I shaved myself head to toe, put on sexy underwear etc and all I get is "I don't think I want sex tonight I'm too tired" he saw I was upset so he said fine then will have sex I know super romantic 🙄.

I said I didn't want to force him into anything but he insisted. The hole time he me made no effort. He doesn't even want to do fourplay anymore because it's too much hassle for him. He just expects giving me a awkward kiss will make me wet and then wonders why he can't fit himself inside of me.

We ended having about five minutes of sex last night until we gave up. He was on top but he said he was to tired so we should swap for abit. The whole time he put a pillow over his face too hide the fact he was falling asleep and soon his dick went limp..

I was so angry and upset. He said he was sorry and but we can have sex in the morning. I confronted him and I said he's always making excuses for not having sex. I asked if it was me that was the issue and he said no it wasn't it's just he's so tired at moment and he thinks something is wrong. I said "yet your never too tired to watch porn".

He said he was sorry and but he will try more but this has been going on for years now and I had no sex this morning by the way

Updates:
1 y
We do currently live with his parents which means we don't get much alone time but when we do he even tries to find excuses then too. He says it will be better once we move into are own place which is soon but I won't believe it until I see it. I'm 25 and he's also 30. I'm in my prime and I have guys lining up but the only man I want isn't even interested. I feel bad because I see he wants to make me happy and he says "I'm sorry I know I've let you down" which hurts because I love him
1 y
0 0

Superb Opinion

  • I am sorry to hear that you are experiencing difficulties in your sexual relationship with your boyfriend. It sounds like there may be some deeper issues at play, such as his physical health and work-related stress, that are affecting his sexual desire and ability to engage in intimate activities with you.

    It is important for you to have an open and honest conversation with your boyfriend about your concerns and feelings, and to listen to his perspective as well. Communication is key in any relationship, and it may be helpful to discuss ways to address the issues and work towards a solution together.

    It is also important to acknowledge and respect each other's boundaries and needs. If your boyfriend is not comfortable with kissing or certain sexual activities, it is important to honor his feelings and find alternative ways to express your intimacy and connection.

    If the issues persist and continue to impact your relationship, it may be helpful to seek the guidance of a professional counselor or therapist who can provide support and guidance in navigating these challenges.

    It is understandable that you are feeling frustrated and hurt by the lack of intimacy in your relationship with your boyfriend. It is important for both partners to feel satisfied and fulfilled in their sexual relationship, and it sounds like this is not currently the case for you.

    It is important to continue to communicate openly and honestly with your boyfriend about your feelings and concerns, and to work together towards finding a solution that works for both of you. It may be helpful to explore different ways to express intimacy and connection, such as non-sexual physical touch and affection, or to schedule dedicated and uninterrupted time for intimacy and sexual activity.

    However, it is also important to consider your own needs and boundaries in the relationship. If you feel that your needs are not being met and that the issues are not being addressed, it may be necessary to reassess the relationship and determine whether it is truly fulfilling and healthy for you.

    Ultimately, it is up to you to decide what is best for your own well-being and happiness. It may be helpful to seek support from a trusted friend or professional counselor to help navigate these challenges and make informed decisions.

Most Helpful Guy

  • I'd slow down the moving in with him. Until you two solve this, it's going to get worse and then it will fracture your relationship way more than it is already strained.

    Try counseling. Seriously. You two are NOT sexually well matched.

    Also, he needs medical help for the sciatica. He ought to have a complete thyroid and endocrine work up -- he may have hormone issues.

    The stress from his two jobs isn't helping either.

    But, it's possible none of that will work and he may not want it to. You need to be thinking about moving on. Continuing with what you're doing isn't worth it for you.

    • I feel like Im just starting to realise I'm in a sexless relationship and I'm going to have put up with it because I love him but at the end of the day I'm still a young, attractive woman who should be having the best sex in her life at the moment yet I'm not. He's had help with all his medical stuff and is pretty much back to normal well as normal as he can be but it's like he's lost all his passion. I have guys constantly asking me out on dates and I have to tell them I have a boyfriend because I'm loyal and I love my boyfriend I really do I don't see myself loving anyone else but I've said before in fights.

    • I don't believe that your option is just to put up with it but if that's what you want 🤷‍♂️.

Most Helpful Girl

  • To answer your title question: you go find another one sis💙

    • That she don’t want to do.. 🤷‍♂️

    • I love him very much we've been together for almost 4 years and everything besides are sex life is great. He treats me with respect, cares for me, works his arse off for a better future for us. He'd do anything for me besides the obvious and that's rare in a man theses days. He spoils me rotten and I'd be crazy to leave him. He treats me like a princess

    • I would ask for an open relationship...

    • Show All

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What Girls & Guys Said

1 5
  • Just suffer and deal with it.

  • Slow things down in the relationship and consider the possibility that y'all might just be better friends than lovers.

    Something I learned in my past relationships is that there are definitely people who make better friends than lovers.

  • Hi.. may be he is stressed of something in his life.. may be at work or thinking something.. try to tell him to be happy and don’t get upset or feel about things at work. And try not revealing him that you are looking for sex.. rather get close to him emotionally he might like that approach or way.. dm me will guide you through,, everyone goes through rough phase in life may be he is something in like that.. ? Possibly

    • He is stressed he told me this last night because he's also caring for a lot of people in his family. I try to get close to him and he pushes me off too

    • May be you try to talk and get close to him.. by caring or talking of caring words of people in his family..

    • If that would work

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  • I don't know girl. But sometimes you have to let things go so you don't loose your happiness. Sounds like you're fighting more and more. And you have to force him to have sex. I've never fallen asleep during sex either.

  • You keep loving him and I'll take care of the sex part

  • GO TO HELL

    • Retard