I’m not sure if I was sexually harassed?

*forwarning, this is sort of a long story*
a few days ago me and this guy (we aren’t really friends, he is my ex’s best friend) and I were texting and he ended up calling me and he asked if I wanted to go for a run with him because we live in the same neighborhood. I thought it was kind of crazy because it was 2 in the morning but I agreed because I was wide awake. We met at the park in our neighborhood and I saw that he was carrying a package of condomns and I confronted him and he acted like he didn’t know why he had them. I was 95% sure he was drunk because he smelled like it and he admitted that he had one beer (but I think it was more.) He started nudging me and pulling me into him while we were talking and I felt that he had an erection and it freaked me out but I didn’t say anything. Then everything kind of happened at once; he was touching me and whispering things in my ear and he said he knew I wanted this and to stop resisting and that I wouldn’t have come there at 2 in the morning if I didn’t want it. He had his penis out and I was sitting on the ground and he was standing over me and he had me cornered, I didn’t know what to do so I sucked his dick a little bit and he kept saying “let me fuck you” and I kept telling him I was on my period but he said he didn’t care and we ended up having sex but I felt awful afterwards and he asked me if I was okay after and I said yes. But I feel like he harassed me and I don’t know if I’m right to think that. What do you think?
Updates:
+1 y
I said “I don’t think this is a good idea” probably 3 or 4 times and I said “let’s go home” but he said no and he acted like I was overreacting so I thought I was but then when he wanted to have sex I felt like I couldn’t get away because I’d already stayed up until that point, if that makes any sense?
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Most Helpful Girls

  • yes you were, that was creepy of him. you didn't text him saying "lets go for a run and have sex" you went thinking you were just going for a run. what he did was rape since you had intercourse with consent yes, but it was out of pressure and him throwing himself on you which is uncalled for and i don't care if he was drunk. he knew that when he texted you. if he could text then he should know about his actions. it's wrong. next time don't talk to him, block his number and ignore his calls.

    • Totally disagree. She consented. Yes maybe she felt pressured but that's not an excuse to have sex with someone. If she's said no and he done it then it would have been rape, but you can't throw around accusations like that when she willingly sucked his penis just because he got it out, and then had sex even although she was on her period. Accusations like that can ruin a mans life.

    • Thank you someone who understands how the law works it's crazy that u say he raped her it's far from the truth

    • Women all gang together in these situations like, "he shouldn't have done that, he raped you!" No. You don't suck someone off then let them have sex with you, then say it's harrassment just because you feel ashamed 🙄

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  • I think if you willingly put his penis in his mouth, and let him sleep with you on your period, then you weren't harassed 🤨 it would be different if he'd forced you but you say you were sitting on the ground so sucked him (your choice) and then you let him have sex with you. Feeling ashamed isn't an excuse to go around accusing people of harassment. You should be more careful with your words.
    Ps. If a guy asks you out at 2am, he wants sex!

    • I like you you smart

  • It sounds like he cornered you and laid on the pressure big time and you panicked and gave in. I'm sorry that this happened to you, I've been there before, myself. If the guy tries this again on you, run like hell or scream "NO!" Don't let this drunk horny creep bully you into giving him sex again.

  • I dont get how women can't just walk away. Or put up a physical fight if they really don't want it. You werent under any influence and you barely knew the guy. You probably wouldn't even see him again if you had just walked away.

Most Helpful Guys

  • I think he was drunk and aggressive. I guess you was harassed somewhat but you had plenty of chances to get out of there. You knew he was drunk, you felt his erection earlier and you saw he had condoms out in plain view for you to see. He pulls his penis out you do nothing then you willingly suck on his dick and instead of saying you didn't want sex you just say your on your period. That night was a valuable lesson. Don't sneak out at 2 in the morning and use the word no or try to leave.

  • No u was not sounds like u was worried but he didn't force himself on you by what u say u you decided to go with what was happening

    • From u say he had his dick out if u had got up and walked past him or told him to put it away then yes I would hold my hands up and say red card he is breaking the law but u feeling pressured when he has not actually done anything to you is not rape

    • At no point have u stated no I don't want to do this or stop people say guys needs lessons on concent by the looks so do women

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • You put your mouth on him while he was touching you all over. I don't see harassment, I see you encouraging him to do it.

  • That's rape. Whether or not you agreed, this is still rape. It isn't consent if he makes you feel too afraid to say no. I know that won't be a popular opinion, but it's the law.

  • Harassment is when you are at work. You were not sexually harassed.

    You just made a series of not so good decisions. Forget it.

  • You could have left at anytime so there is a part of me that thinks you wanted it. Also he should have never been so persistent after you said no... i dont think its harassment more like peer pressure