I think the better question would be, Did you ever intend to sleep with more than one or two people in life?

Like did you grow up hoping to have sex with as many people as you could? Or Did things go wrong with the first and because you didn't want to give up on having a sex life, you eventually ended up sleeping with someone else later on?
#FeelFreeToList #HowManyLaysDoesItTake
Updates:
+1 y
didn't mean to confuse a few of you. I was asking if you intended to sleep with a lot of people before you die… I think some assumed i was asking if you’d have threesomes or cheat on your partner and have sex with someone else. Not what i meant at all lmao
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Most Helpful Guys

  • I did not actually think , when I was a virgin , that I wanted to have sex with as many women as possible. And when I did have my first sexual Relationship.. not my first sex experience... (My second with three years in between lol...) I had studied a lot of porn (not saying that's the way to go I'm just saying it happened) so it turned out I was really good at it , and as I am an approval seeker , when that relationship was over I craved more approval so more sex. But not with every random I met, I wanted it to be special because sex with someone I care about is so much better. I've had sex with seven women ( of course except for the 2 one night stands I had a lot of sex with the others.. a lot lol) and I Love- loved three of them, the other four I was in lust with lol and I think I was just practicing for the next important one. . And I'm so 55 so judge away. All I know is the next one had better look out because I've been picky lately def, looking for for Ms right instead of Ms right now and it's been a minute.🙃.

    • Yes I've had years between sexual partners too. I like that you learned from porn because so did we. And 7 is pretty great for your age although i still will never understand ONS

    • I think the one night stands came along usually when it had been years between.. and when someone showed interest I wasn't even sure if I even still knew how to do it anymore , so my character flaws and past traumas (all of which I've been working on ) took over and I made bad choices which I fully take responsibility for today.( I say bad choices just for me , not saying they are bad choices for everyone)

  • I don't intend on sleeping with anyone.
    I didn't grow up thinking that I will sleep with multiple people.

    I grew up thinking that I will find myself in a meaningful relationship with another human being.

    But that's too much to ask from anyone these days. Relationships have lost all meaning, people have lost their ability to connect.

    Relationships have been replaced by meaningless hookups.

    Focusing on oneself is much more rewarding and better in the long run

    • I fully agree with your first two paragraphs. It doesn't take being with a lot of people to know what u want. And yes sadly hookup culture is taking over. I truly hate that

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  • Not exactly. I always wanted a lifelong partner as I have now with my wife. At the same time, I lost my virginity to a hook-up, and I was so lame at the time that I practically wanted to marry the girl only to find she was with another guy the next week.

    Then I also had a job that required me to travel to new cities all the time. Lots of relationships became LDRs as I moved from one city to the next.

    So I got a bit excited by the prospect but undressing new women since it seemed like the idea of a lifelong partner -- as much I ultimately wanted that -- seemed so far away. But my intent was always for a lifelong partner.

    I never had the upfront intention of sleeping with more than one woman. At the same time, I might have enjoyed that I ended up doing that for a while until I met my now-wife who stuck around through thick and thin.

    • Well im glad you wanted something lifelong

    • I actually wanted to marry not only that first hook-up but also my first girlfriend. LTRs becoming LDRs was actually an ongoing problem with me. I made my first girlfriend in uni and I wanted to marry her, and I even shared my dream of returning to Japan and she talked about getting a passport and seeing me in Japan, and maybe even entertaining the idea of marriage together in Japan. She had a promising future ahead of her though that would take her to the totally opposite side of the US from me (her on the east coast, me on the west), and our relationship fizzled out (she called it off) after a year of attempting an LDR with no prospect in sight of meeting each other again in person while we were so preoccupied with our new careers. That's kind of been the story of my whole life not just with lovers but friends. I moved all over the place growing up and then some after growing up. Saying goodbye to people I knew as I moved to a new place became the most recurring trend as a result of my nomadic lifestyle. When I met my now-wife though, I started refusing jobs that required me to move when before I was down to go anywhere. It's like I settled down not just with her but also in a place.

  • I planned on one, being each others first and allowing room for potential problems, maybe two tops.

    Yeah life got messed up at 14 and look at me now. No plans to ever have as many partners as I have.

    I would never ever thought I'd have more than two back then. No goals to have as many as possible, that thought has never crossed my mind.

    • Well at least it wasn't in the books

    • Yeah, who does that? Silly question I guess, I've known some guys who do that.

  • Not in my youth but as I got in high school and started realizing a lot of guys liked me I kinda got the idea of maybe it wouldn't be so bad to experience all these kind of men.

    • I loved being loved but more so in a date a lot before i chose who i wanted to sleep with

  • I had a very open mind about that and enjoyed the challenge of going from one partner to another..

    • What was the challenge tho

    • Like what was challenging about it

  • Well, I was a hormone driven teenage boy with a massively out of control sex drive, so I often fantasized about sleeping with just about every decently attractive woman I saw.

    However, I was (and am) also a hopeless romantic, with good self control, so I only wanted to actually sleep with someone with whom I was in a relationship with.

    So, despite my almost overpowering urge to get laid, what I really wanted was to have lots of sex with only a small handful of people over time, because I was realistic enough to know that not every relationship was going to work out.

    • Yea its hard to think so realistically sometimes but i think it has to do with extreme optimism that gets the best of hs who assume relationships will work

  • I think this is a question only a woman or a GigaChad could even ask. Most of us men aren't this lucky.

  • No never imagined that. I originally thought my first was “the one” and I’d never sleep with anyone else... l. t just didn’t work out that way.

    • Yea it happens like that sometimes

  • Well to be honest I didn't even know that I was going to get to spend the night
    LOL I didn't know everybody is going to spend the night together and sleep with each other
    This question brought back memories when I was a virgin and I lost my Cherry LOL and I was so disappointed because having sex was not like it was supposed to be I thought I would see fireworks so I lost my virginity and the sex really sucked and now I was going to hell and it wasn't even pleasurable
    The same time I was talking to God telling him I was sorry I was also thinking what did I do wrong how come I didn't see the fireworks
    The girl asked me to come over again it was the same outcome she liked it I didn't I'm going to hell twice now
    The third time same thing again I'm going to hell for the third time and it wasn't that good the girl kept telling me. It was great stop it but I was obsessed with it I wanted to see the fireworks

    I was 15 and a half almost 16 the girl is 19 in college she was beautiful she was hot she was naughty I was going to hell and I'm still asking God to teach me tell me what I'm doing wrong

    I even said that I would marry her but I wanted to be able to please her I wanted her to see the fireworks I wanted to see the fireworks I wanted to feel good before I went to hell LOL

    2 days before she was going back to school she called me told me her mom is going to be gone on Saturday and wanted me to come over I said okay and I thought about it hard and long how was I going to make it the best when I got there I said I'm just going to do the complete opposite of what I've been doing

    So I did that and I made it all about her I thought when you slept with somebody that you were meant to be with them so every touch every kiss every move that I made I made her feel it it was like a very spiritual touch it was just beautiful we had sex for at least an hour and when we were done I thought I was in love because I seen the fireworks I felt the fireworks coming out of her at the same time you ever coming out of me

    And when she laid there right next to me and held onto me tight and told me now I see what you were talking about I seen the fireworks our energies touched became one and exploded
    I do the only thing that was going to save me from hell was to date her and marry her but of course you would back to school and two weeks later I was babysitting for a lady and when she got home the lady that she was with ask me if I wanted a ride home I said yes and the next thing I know I was in bed with her doing the exact same thing that I did the fourth time with the girl from college I seen the fireworks then and so does that lady and for one year straight every night every other night it got better and better I thought I was going to have to marry her too that's what I get for being 15 and a half 16 years old and then she told me that her and her husband were getting back together and I said what I didn't even know that she was married
    I was heartbroken but she made it up to me and she introduced me to one of her friends that was 37 I think and for almost a year I went out with her how is it going to marry all three of these women

    Do even though there's a game plan in loving the one that you're with and marrying her he quite didn't work out that way now I was 17 and a half and I watch guys basically used girls and they all thought they were big shots I never I told my friends about these three girls because I didn't like the way they acted and that's basically disrespected the girls today had been in bed with for 2 minutes and would blab their mouth he taught me you don't kiss and tell and you respect the person you're with most guys with put a little notch on their belt every time that they would have sex and they will try to have sex as many times as possible with different girls and I just thought that was wrong no I never thought that I would sleep with more than one girl

    As a matter of fact by senior year the last day of school

    • And our teacher was asking that's what we're going to do with our lives she handed us a piece of paper it had a bunch of questions on it and she said we had 15 minutes to fill it out we are all done you and your paper forward and they handed it to the person on their left I only remember one question when you get married do you want to marry a virgin or a non-virgin and I was stuck on that question and I wrote down I wanted to marry a virgin the teacher read the question and then pick somebody to answer it When she got to that question she said how many people said they wanted to marry a virgin the girl that had my piece of paper raised her hand she was the only one in class to raise her hand and she said this person said that you wanted to marry a virgin and she said is there anybody else nobody raise their hand she said okay whose paper is at my face turned beet red the girl that had my paper she knew I was we were good friends and she said it was Steve's and she asked me why would you want to marry a virgin I said why not I said because she's pure and I said I just felt it that would be the best she asked me if I had had sex yet I told her yes but everybody in class because I knew just about everybody in there give me a hard time but I didn't care and to this day I still don't LOL

  • I only ever wanted to be with one person. I wanted to meet my person, fall in love, and never look back. It didn't work out that way tho. It hardly ever does. I admire people that have that tho.

    • I like your thought on this... like having that mindset u grew up 👏🏽👏🏽

    • @talka20 thank you.

    • You're welcome @ShaTTeredMasterpeace

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  • i was very boy crazy so i thought it would be a lot

    • Im definitely boy crazy but still going strong

  • When I was younger I thought no one would want me if I had no experience, so I did want to sleep with more people. My mindset is completely different now though, and although I’ve only slept with 3 people I wish it was less. One of them was a one time thing that I shouldn’t have done.

    • I agree i’ve slept with 2 and still regret ever surpassing 1

    • @DizzyDesii It’s kind of awful having regrets, I wish I could turn back time, but I’m happy about two of the people I slept with and wouldn’t change it. They are people who I was talking to for a while or in a relationship with, and people that I respect and get on with

  • Yeah, that horse 🐴 is out of the barn.

  • I thought I was gonna be slut sleeping with lots of people but my life didn't turn out that way since I settled down early

    • I wish more people saw perks to settling down early or more so whenever it felt right. I wanted to be married between 18-24 but guess it wasn't mean to be

  • I have only slept with my college roommate and my husband and that will be all. Even with my roommate it didn't start out sexual at all, just experimenting.

    • Yea just experimenting is what most are doing. Its something i can't bring myself to do because i dont have the drive for it. I feel experimenting is for people who questions things. Im pretty certain in what i want, even if i haven't tried something specific just yet. Bjt im glad to hear you're married now

    • I have been happily married for 7 years now and she is still one of my best friends. We never talk about our little experienced and my husband knows nothing about it.. she walk into our dorm one night after showering and I had already showered and sitting at my desk in nothing but a towel on and was nonchauntly fingering while reading a Harry Potter novel and ask WHAT ARE YOU DOING? Hahaha. it started innocently right there.

  • Uhm with 14 I thought that I would meet one person and that's about it forever but that's not reality and the first isn't always the right and I'm glad it didn't just stay by one to be honest

    • But how is it not being realistic? Its uncommon but its certainly realistic

    • Like not just sleeping with the first forever, was the best thing that happened. Not that the sex was awful, but cause I didn't know any different then him and there was definitely a better sex partner out there

    • I meant not realistic in like you don't always have luck and the first person you meet isn't most likely not going to the love of your life, unless you're really lucky!

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  • Ironically enough, I never planned on it nor did I see myself in doing it. I kind of grew up around men who did constantly hook up and being players and I actually turned off to the idea.


    My path just happened out of chance and bad timing. I’m very good at socializing and conversations but that came from experiences as a boyfriend and friend. Nonetheless I kind of just learned to keep an open mind on life and to be honest; I’m a better man because of it. I no longer judge those harshly like I used to lol

    • Yea i can't say the same but glad to know lmao

  • nope... I never had this mentality or ideals

    I didn't even planned to have sex in the first place, the first time it happened... I just ended up in a relationship with one of my best friends, and then the other thing happened naturally

    and I did stay with her till 19's or so... after that, there was a very brief period of time in which I gave it a thought, to possibilities... mostly, inquired and questioned myself about the possibility of having sex with someone with that being the priority or motivation and I just didn't like the idea because I really didn't feel that it would be satisfactory for me, or not without some sort of conflict in my being

    in between my first and second relationship, second happened about the times I was 20 years old... there were "plenty" of "opportunities" if I had chosen to just have as much sex as possible, some even insisted on me that we could try it and just get at it, but no... even as of today, if this were to be my goal, it could just happen all over the place, but I'm just not like that, it is not within me so I just don't do it and that is absolutely fine

    I just get into committed and exclusive relationships and I'm more than happy having it that way

    • Very good insight

  • Wow, very interesting question.
    For me, I was never really into it when I was a kid or young teenager. The stuff I used to see on TV or movies just wasn't really appealing to me. BUT. When I first had sex, well, things have changed.

    What I want to say is, when you experience it for the first time, it's hard to abstain if you don't need to.

    • I think my religious beliefs is why i continue to abstain so easily. I dont need to but i want to because i hate to continue to disappoint both myself and the Lord

  • No, I never planned to and I never have

    • Yea i dont intend to either

  • Didn't picture it being more than 1 person, but that is not the case. I am still selective of who I sleep with, but each of the ones I did were people I genuinely felt a connection and desire to be with.

    • Well thats just as great to hear. It takes true effort to accomplish that

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