I was a sexual person with people I dated before my current boyfriend. What’s the difference?

I used to love being intimate with who I was seeing and I feel like I have lost a good amount of the passion. My boyfriend now wants to be intimate much more than anyone else I have previously dated, but for some reason it feels more transactional. I’m not as into it because he is constantly talking about it and wanting to put his dick in my mouth. I think it’s because I don’t think he cares to please me that mentally it isn’t working for me. I tried to tell him I needed him to be more seductive if he wanted it, but it’s usually a couple of kisses and then boom he is trying to insert something. Has anyone else had issues like this? How would you tell the other or explain this? He gets pretty upset anytime I say no.
1 0

Superb Opinion

  • It sounds like he just thinks having a girlfriend = effort-free sex whenever he wants it. You said you don’t think he cares to please you? So does that mean he doesn’t give a shit about your orgasms, either? If you care about this relationship, sit his ass down, perhaps in a semi public place when sex isn’t imminent and where he can’t go off on you, and lay it out. I don’t often recommend ultimatums because you have to be prepared to follow through either way, but here it may be apropos. Life is too short for selfish lovers.

Most Helpful Guy

  • You did not know that girls are not supposed to say no? I am just kidding don't hit me with that bat... lol It is a shame however that a lot of guys and especially boyfriends think that their satisfaction is all that matters. Aren't relationships supposed to be about each others wants and needs? Selfish and self centered it is... why does it have to be about you when it is clearly all about me... lol If guys really new the secret that girls know, that is if guys knew that if they pleased girls that the girls would make sure they were pleased as well, well shhhh... it is still a secret that most guys have not figured out yet.

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What's Your Opinion? Sign Up Now!

What Girls & Guys Said

0 6
  • Don't consent when he's abrupt and not seductive and tell him why.

  • Just tell him you need forplay for you to get off also what he is doing is not enough

  • It sounds like he only sees you as a sperm receptacle. Talk to him. If he doesn't want to please you and is only interested in satisfying himself, you might need to move on.

  • maybe get him to read some erotica so he understands what really turns women on?

  • He’s not reciprocating intimacy so you’re feeling left out.

  • Intimacy is very important for great passionate which your boyfriend wants and which you had in past with others, but your isn't ready or doesn't want to build intimacy and he just interested in getting down straight to business