If a woman has consensual sex with a man and enjoys it, how can she claim she was "used" for sex?

[Anonymous]

I see this all the time and I have never understood the mindset. Women seem to think they are entitled to something more than sex and feel "used" if their relationship with a man is only sexual.

Is the woman not also "using" the man for sex? How are they different?

Is it entitlement? If so, why do they feel entitled to something more?

It seems to me that it is based on an assumption that sex is something a woman gives a man, and/or a man takes from a woman. But how are the man and woman different here? Do men enjoy sex more than women or something?

Can someone explain this to me?

[LaneHale42]

When a guy starts dating a woman and they have sex, but then later on he decides that she isn't what he wants (Maybe she's mean, maybe she's immature, crazy, whatever) she isn't going to tell people that. He could've given her a million reasons why they aren't compatible. She's still gonna tell her friends "Men are such pigs, he just used me for sex.'

[Asker]

Yes, I do think that happens sometimes. But why do some women still believe that when the very idea of it is flawed? Today casual sex is the norm, and women themselves have made it that way. But then when they actually engage in what they fought for the "right" to do, which is have casual sex like men often do, they paint themselves as victims anyway. I don't get that.

[LaneHale42]

You answered it yourself "They paint themselves as victims anyway." Some women are famous for never taking any accountability for their actions. They could cheat one their husbands and come up with every excuse imaginable to justify it. I wasn't happy. Sex is just sex. My husband talks down to me. It was just a blowjob. I was drunk. And on and on and on... It's no different when they get dumped. Even if the agreement was for fuck buddies and he stops calling her because he isn't attracted she's still gonna say "He just used me for sex." 😭😭😭

[Asker]

No, I didn't answer my own question, which was not about what they do, but rather why they do it. Yes, they paint themselves as victims anyway, but why? Yes, they make excuses and blame it on the guy, but why? I know what the female behavior is here, but my question is all about why they continue to do it.

[Anonymous]

I think women are more likely to want sex to lead to a relationship, and we could be disappointed and hurt when that doesn't happen. But that doesn't really answer your specific question.

If a woman has consensual sex with a man, and she enjoys it, she is obviously not being used because she is getting the same thing out of it that the man is. I don't like that language either because it infers sex is less important or enjoyable to women than men. I'm sure I'll catch some flack for saying it but I do think there is some entitlement involved sometimes too.

But if a guy lies to a woman about his feelings for her so she'll keep having sex with him and then dumps her, then yes, he was obviously using her, and that's a terrible thing to do. It's all about honest communication and expectations.

[Guy13]

They have to blame their initial guilt and shame upon someone…🤷🏻‍♂️

[Berethor]

A man is like a key, a woman is like a lock, men and women are different.

[FilmGuy93]

She was hoping to have something more with the guy.

[TheBigGuy9]

Rationalization is the second strongest human drive. How she is afterwards.

[maximumpower]

She can't.
It's a convenient excuse for her to feel better about herself, tho.
Also makes for sympathy discussions among friends.

[Twalli]

The don't feel used until they look back at the sex and try to determine why they wanted it.

[Anonymous]

Delicious.

[Asker]

You're kinda dumb, I see.