If every time we have sex my boyfriend watches himself going in and out me does he imagine someone else?

Question

He does that 90% of the time and barely looks at me.  He also does points where he is on top and puts his head next to mine so he doesn’t see me at all.  Is he imagining?

LesterJester · Accepted Answer

I'll explain this as straightforward as possible.

Generally speaking, guys have more of a mental leaning towards Touch and Sight. This is through much of what we do in the world and not just sex and boobies.

As the same time, despite what the movies might make men out as, we have a one track mind. Whatever is in our headlights is all we got focus for. If we really focus on something and it's something we really enjoy/like/love, we're going to do that one thing to the best of our abilities. Distractions lead to mistakes.

Sure we can multi-task, all humans can. But the more we multi-task at once, the more mediocre results become (or we burn out, take your pick)

When that thing is right in front of you, then and there, your mind isn't focused on anything else. I've always been focused on my partners every damn single time.

And at the same time, here's where it all comes together:

He's feeling everything that's going on, just like you are. But like any generalised male, he wants to see what he's feeling, which further increases the sensations.

When he looks down there, he isn't thinking of someone else. He is seeing and feeling what you're doing to him. What he's doing to you. With a good mental image, he can rest to your side a bit... But not to think about some rando chick. He still has a mental image of what's going on down there and can now get more comfortable.

Being on top is tiring, frig.

He was still looking at you, just a different part of you. He's looking at what you both are doing together. Maybe you should try it. I doubt your partner would be upset.

Stimulate your visuals and add it to your sensations. You don't always have to keep constant eye contact.

TotallyAlmost · Accepted Answer

Probably not. Sometimes it's exciting to watch the penis penetrating. As for head next to you, that might just mean his upper body is tired. Missionary is like planking and crunching at the and time. Gotta have a strong core.

Baylayy · Answer

He's enjoying. But if he almost always doesn't see you then that's weird. Talk to him about it

Mr1derful · Answer

No, we love to watch ourselves going in and out! Maybe turn off the lights or use a candle to lessen the watching lol.

AimeeKyle · Answer

Not complicated…. no. Men are visual creatures (watching it go in and out). If he isn’t looking at you he is likely trying not to cum (making it better / longer for both of you).

RuthlessAggression · Answer

nope

Twalli · Answer

I love watching myself go in and out of my girlfriend.

nawtee_me · Answer

He is more interested in his dick than in you, you need to talk to him about it. Or get rid of him because it won't get any better if you don't stop him now...