If I didn’t feel an urge to kiss or touch guy on first date, does that mean I’ll never be sexually attracted to him?

I don’t know if something’s wrong with me. He is good looking, great chat and personality but on our first date I didn’t look at him and go ‘omg I wanna have sex with him.’ I didn’t get an urge to touch him either but I was nervous and it was first time meeting. Am I overthinking?

is sexual desire usually instant?
0 1

Superb Opinion

  • Everyone is different. Take your time your heart and gut instinct will tell you when to touch him or have sex with him. Has this happened with previous bfs? Are you a virgin?

Most Helpful Guy

  • Sexual desire instant hmm, well not exactly sexual, but physically attraction to a person is instant. Sexually attraction can come with attachment which I think is called demisexual, don't quote me though. So basically you gotta be in love to be sexually attracted.

    Maybe that's your scenario, or you're not a sexual person at all which could be the case

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • It can be immediate or it can develop as you spend more time together and you warm to his advances.

    • @AustinMan I have a serious question for you, sir:. What if he doesn't make any "advances.". What if he just acts really chill? Is that a bad thing? Will that affect him negatively?

    • That will kill the whole affair pretty quickly.

    • Damn. That sucks. So that means I have to be "cheeky"?

    • Show All
  • Not really the first date is generally kind of filled with anxiety but once You get comfortable with each other then You should be able to tell.

  • It varies by person to person. In some cases the electrifying feeling of unmitigated attraction will seize someone instantly whereas in other cases it may need time to blossom and slowly reveal itself due to a great number of reasons. If you find someone attractive, but don't feel particularly compelled to crawl around under the sheets with them, that is actually a good sign. Not a bad one.

  • Sexual desire isn't, sexual attraction is

    • I thought he was good looking and we had great chat and good vibes. I was super super nervous but I didn’t really look at him and feel turned on. I don’t really know what sexual attraction should feel like

    • You like what you see, independent of the personality

  • No it isn't always instant; it usually takes time for me to get up the desire to kiss or make love to a woman.

  • It's normal I guess maybe you would take some time to feel that way for him