In YOUR Opinion: What Is The Difference Between BDSM And Abuse?

Serious question... Yes if you just rolled your eyes just keep on scrolling... I want to know your honest thoughts... I see others misunderstanding the things I post about and ask... I hope this brings clarity... BDSM is not abuse... I would do a mytake but those seem pointless on this site... I'm obviously not an expert which is why I am asking for feedback...
In YOUR Opinion: What Is The Difference Between BDSM And Abuse?
BDSM is CONSENSUAL just like any sex acts you perform...
BDSM is CONSENSUAL just like any sex acts you perform...
The Outfits Are Obviously Hot
The Outfits Are Obviously Hot
Relinquishing Control To Your Partner
Relinquishing Control To Your Partner
My Birthday Is In December
My Birthday Is In December
But Now I Am Kind Of Wishing It Was In November
But Now I Am Kind Of Wishing It Was In November
Angelina Jolie does it... Not just in the movies either...
Angelina Jolie does it... Not just in the movies either...
Shes just biting his stick... Dont lose your minds
She's just biting his stick... Don't lose your minds
😏
😏
Just a nerd 🤓🖖✨
Just a nerd 🤓🖖✨
Updates:
+1 y
Updated: Now that we have established that BDSM is NOT abuse... I would like to see a raise of hands 🙋🙆 on who thinks they might be interested trying this with a partner they trust... 🎀 It's okay if you still hate it... It's just a question...
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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Bdsm is something agreed upon by two consenting adults who understand pain can bring pleasure but they can also stop it with a safe word. Abuse is someone using power over an unwilling partner

  • Bdsm is a consensual act, abuse is not

    • I completely agree 🎀

  • Consent... nothing more nothing less

  • The major difference is BDSM is done with consent. The submissive gives up control to the dominant willingly because it turns them on to do so. If at any point they don't like something being done to them, they feel safe speaking up and the dom will stop. With abuse, consent isn't given or the dom won't stop when asked.

    • On your follow-up question, I already have. My girlfriend and I have both gotten handcuffed, strapped down, and blindfolded by each other. The experience of being in either role in a complete power exchange with someone you trust is very hot.

    • Thanks for responding to the update!!! Awesome 🔥

  • consent is the only difference. BDSM is when you ask for it, abuse is when you don't

  • Consent. It's all about consent

  • BDSM has consent and rules.. Abuse does not

  • I really don’t see a difference.

  • One word, consent!
    That is literally all. If both sides want it then there is no abuse. Otherwise it is abuse and a very serious one.

    • I totally agree!!! Thanks for the feedback 🎀

  • Think of it this way if i spanked you on the ass in the bedroom it's BDSM if i slap you in the face it's abuse

    • @Secret6620 i would try it with a partner i trust

  • Mutuality

    • Sadomasochism to my knowledge is the giving and receiving of pleasure from inflicting pain or humiliation. It can be in activity or passivity. The practitioner can switch between being the aggressor or the subservient. Not to be confused with Sexual sadism disorder, where pain and humiliation are required for sexual arousal and can lead to distress and impairment. Those psychotic individuals that would eventually murder by torture for sexual gratification. That’s where it becomes strictly physical abuse. B&D or bondage is sexual gratification from being restrained, sexually teased or punished by a variety of methods for sexual intensity.

    • Thanks for info!!! I actually didn't know this 🌸

    • You’re welcome, have a friend in medical school that pays her expenses as a part time dominatrix. ☺️ I learned a lot by asking questions myself.

    • Show All
  • Bdsm is consensual

    • 🙋🏽‍♀️

  • One is consent and hot, the other is evil and not.

  • Consent and control

  • BDSM is a understanding and agreement between people for a limit of how far to go and consists of a safe word to stop it. Abuse is unwanted and emotionally scaring and even can be physically scaring onto someone that is in fear and trying to defend themselfs.

    • Thanks🎀

  • One is lustfully enjoyable while the other, not so much👀

  • Depending on if consent is given under any form of coercion, those groups are hierarchical, predatory, sleizy and creepy. Also very hard to infiltrate to see if crimes are being committed. Drugs are a big part of these cultures, under the influence of substances people do shit they normally would not do.

    • Been there, done that got the merchandise, it's a bit like eating a bad meal at a restaurant. You just end up wishing you ordered the wagu beef burger and chips instead.

  • Difference? Love. BDSM is "love" based, while abuse is "anger" based. BDSM, the submissive party has a voice and can alter its treatment. In abuse the sub is in for the ride.

    • I love this!!! I understand and it makes sense!!! Thank you very much 🎀

  • As a bdsm dominant myself, I think I am well equiped to answer this. There is a fine line between bdsm and abuse. And this line is called a safe word. Even though the submissive is restrained, she has the most control. She delegates what happens next to her dominant. She enjoys the uncertainity of not knowing what is coming and/or the inability to stop the dominant. However she can always use a safeword to stop or let the dominant know she is nearing her limits. These limits are established beforehand as things she likes, things she wants to try and things she does not want to try. A contract is drawn up if need be.

    Safewords are of two types, one for soft limits and one for hard limits. Soft limit safewords are used to let the dominant know that she is near her limits or send a 'back off' message. A hard limit safeword is used to stop the entire intercourse no matter what. Safewords are chosen based on the thing the submissive is least likely to say during a normal intercourse. Red and Yellow/Mercy are standard for hard and soft limits respectively.

    Bdsm doesn't always require restraints or sensory deprivation. As long as there is one person willing to submit and one willing to dominate, it can be classified as bdsm.

    • well said. am a dominant as well.

    • OMG!!! This was extremely informative!!! Thank you for the detailed feedback!!! Freaking awesome!!! 🎀

  • I would think the only difference is one is consensual with a SafeWord and one is actually abuse

    • 👍👍

    • Knew it 😏

    • Lol...

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