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Inside the Mind of a Male Virgin: What I Wish Women Understood

Inside the Mind of a Male Virgin: What I Wish Women Understood

This is in response to @Ozanne's article of a similar topic. Granted, while I greatly appreciate the sentiment of her article, I do not think the author fully grasps the scope of the amount of pain and humiliation that male virgins like yours truly really feel, nor what it actually means. Though to be fair, I do not really think any woman for that matter truly grasps or, or ever will. Which is precisely why I have written this article.

I hate women,

I am not even going to lie about it. That is not to say I am proud of it, or that it is something I accept as normal and healthy. But I am only acknowledging that it exists, and that it is something I need to work on. As a male virgin, I hate women. That is, truly hate them. I harbor a very deep, inner resentment that is rooted in years upon years of rejection, the friend zone, being heartbroken, and taken advantage of.

The last woman I dated friend zoned me and instead of taking it gracefully, I told her that I no longer wanted to be her friend at all and that I hated her. Despite the fact that she had been as nice and polite about it as possible, I still made her cry. Not because I truly hated her, but simply because I only wanted to cause her pain. Because I recognized that she was a woman and I hate women.

My mother played a huge part in it,

My mother promised me that she would always be there for me and that I could talk to her about anything no matter what. That being said, I poured my heart out to her. I sent her extremely long Facebook messages outlining everything that was truly bothering me, my most personal fears and anxieties, and embarrassment over being a virgin. Upon waiting almost two whole years for a response, she finally tells me that she does not want to deal with me and that she is not going to answer them.

My own mother essentially gave up on me.

If a man's mother is not there for him, then what woman will be?

What it means to be a male virgin

ImagiIne waking up every day and being surrounded by extremely beautiful woman from classmates, coworkers, and friends to the media, internet, and television. One cannot even visit a shopping mall without seeing those Victoria's Secret angels' images blown up on screen. Then knowing that you will never be able to sleep with any of them. That they would never give you the time of day. That they will always be out of your league.

This is what it means to be a male virgin, only, it gets worse.

Imagine knowing that there are is a small but elite class of men at the very top of the totem pole whom are monopolizing all of these women. That there are men who seemingly have it all and can sleep with whomever they want whenever they want, and that you will never be one of those males. Because as cliche as it sounds, women do only sleep with assholes and that is truth.

The true pain, then, comes not from the lack of sex, but from knowing that you could never have sex even if you wanted it. It is about knowing that you are inferior, that you are less of a man, that there are other men better than you.

Is it any surprise then why men like me hate women?

Women are the source of our pain. It is observing their mating habits and knowing that they will never sleep with guys like us. That they only want the players and assholes. That they will always consider themselves better than and above us. I genuinely believe that Instagram alone has made this phenomenon that much worse. Now practically any woman can become a model overnight reinforcing the celebrity-fan relationship between men and women.

I have self harmed. I have screamed at the top of my lungs. I have punched holes in the wall and I have cried to the Heavens above. My pain is of a deep, burning ontological kind. I am inferior. I am not a DiCaprio. Women will never love me. I am not a true man. I cannot have sex even if I wanted it.

The media makes it worse

Seeing magazines like Cosmopolitan which almost go out of their way to normalize premarital sex and reinforce the idea that it is abnormal to be a virgin only adds salt to the wound. That and virtually the entire Jewish leftist media which is advancing the narrative of promiscuity. From television to movies, books, magazines, and music.

If you are not having sex then you are weird and abnormal. Words cannot even describe the feelings of alienation, inadequacy, and burning hatred and sorrow that men like me experience.

Not to mention the

discrepancy between what women say and what they actually do.

Women like to claim that there is nothing wrong with being a male virgin or that we should not feel ashamed, yet their actions say otherwise. Because even though 90% of women may say such things, it is also true that 90% of women would not sleep with a male virgin. In short, they are lying through their teeth. And that is very frustrating. Especially when it feels like we are settling for the leftovers of another man, because oftentimes the only time they will ever sleep with us is after they are done screwing around with the aforementioned assholes at the top.

I am a very bitter person

They do not call me the underground man for nothing. As stated earlier, I really hate women. I am not proud of it, but it is true. I like to wear designer clothing and then laugh at women who do not have as many nice things as me. The fact that I have more money than them makes me feel superior. I listen to music that is objectifying and degrading to women. I view them as nothing more than sexual objects and whores that deserve to be heartbroken.

I am proud of none of this, but am only being honest. That is what being a male virgin does to a man. How am I supposed to love women when every woman in my life has let me down?

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  • What screws us up most in life is the picture in our head of how it is supposed to be... you can't heal your wounds if you keep touching them. Good luck.

  • yeah you hate women. but your hate is irrational. you dont know all women. also no man attracts all women. but if you attract none, its not on women its on you.
    plus who told you, you will be happier after sex? this void in your heart will still be there. you lack purpose in life and drive, not sex.

  • Wow, you have some major fucking issues bro and the least of your worries should be losing your virginity.

    We all get hurt and our hearts broken by the opposite sex but that's not reason to have so much hate a resentment towards the whole gender!!! YOU CHOOSE to feel this way and to behave a certain way and what you choose make people not want to know you.

    I would never sleep with you because your attitude is disgusting, I wouldn't even be your friend let alone let you touch me.

    • Like I said before, you are a woman. You do not understand. You never felt anything like this.

    • Rejection and getting hurt by the opposite sex is not a snake exclusive thing so stop making that excuse. You have issue and you need to deal with them

  • Brother, get it together. You need to let go of that anger. And you need to figure out how to find intimacy, not sex.

    You keep grouping all women. Stop doing that. Resist the urge that comes from being an American. We are in a weird stupid backwards culture sometimes. We think it makes sense to group people by race, sex, religion, etc.

    Just stop with that silliness. Stop dating women who friendzone you. And start dating women who are good heart, nice, and kind.

    You have to know that in American society, you won't find many who will have pity on you. At GaG, it is much, much worse. People tend to step on and kick those who are down or depressed.

    So understand that and find ways to interact and interface with people who suffer from similar issues. Use supportgroups, facebook, meetup. com, etc. Those are great online tools to talk with people who are dealing with the same things as you.

    You can fix this man.

    Just be smart, create a plan, and execute.

  • Waaaaahhh, life is so hard because I didn't get what I want 😢 What a crock of shit. You blame everyone else for your issue, which isn't even a big deal! It's not the worst problem in the world or one that isn't solveable. YOU are the reason you're a virgin. You hate women because it's easier than hating yourself and instead of working on yourself and figuring out your issues you write crap like this to make yourself feel better and throw yourself a pity party.

    Women do not OWE you their bodies. Stop expecting things to be given to you. Grow up. Work on yourself and stop blaming others for your issues. It's clear who's at fault here and it certainly isn't women. Don't be the next Elliot Roger. Get your life together.

    • You act as though you know exactly where he is coming from, you don't. You don't understand the all too common trap that males get themselves into. Why? because you are a woman. You have gotten more than most guy's can ask for. Quit the negative talk and empathize, he's in a vulnerable place and you just shit all over him.

    • @OrdinaryGentleman To add to that, I never said I was proud of who I am. I was only giving an honest and accurate description so that hopefully women will understand just how painful and defeating it really is.

    • @OrdinaryGentleman grow up. You've no idea what I've been through as a person. If you think not having sex is the worst thing someone can go through in life you have no idea what life is like and you need to experience it.

    • Show All

  • There was a guy on GaG a year ago that did all these Takes about how cruel women were and he would go on about how men were entitled to have sex. He'd do a Take about how he was going to a prostitute, then he'd do another Take about how prostitution was so evil. He had this thing about the Orthodox Church, and also went on about how his mother let him down. You're not that same guy, are you?

    The issue you're having isn't women, it's YOU. Be positive, do things that expand your life, things that give you a feeling of accomplishment and self-confidence. Women just kind of float into and out of the picture along the way. Just be friendly and talk to them. If they're not interested, just keep working on your activities until the next one comes along. Don't be desperate.

    • You must be talking about this JRichards dude. I remember him too. What is up with these wannabes Elliot Rodger's, that are gaining in numbers so slowly but steady lately?

    • @Unit1 - Yeah, I forgot. JRichards was that guy.

  • It seems, there's more than just the whole issue of "not being able to hook up with a woman". You seem to lack confidence, and maybe that's why some women aren't attracted. Also, hooking up isn't all that cracked up to be. Sex doesn't change you. You're still you. And even if you do lose your virginity, that doesn't guarantee that you'll be hooking up with whoever you want to non-stop. That's not how life works. Like I said, sex isn't all that cracked up to be. 9 out of 10 your first time isn't gonna be great. And the times after that aren't gonna be that great either. Not everyone is great at sex. Even though sex can be pleasurable, there's a lot of risks that comes along with it. Feelings getting attached, unwanted pregnancies, STDs, etc etc. Also, think about what type of girls that get with the it guys. For example, these Instagram models. Nine outta ten they're sucking and fucking all sorts of famous people and they're probably not being safe about it either. Do you really wanna risk for those types of girls? Have you heard about what's going on with Usher? And he isn't the only one who is dealing with sexual issues out there in Hollywood. This world isn't a safe place. Especially with the rise of dating apps (no hate on those who use them). You really need to stop being so obsessed with the idea of sex. Because like I said earlier, sex isn't what it's cracked up to be. Instead of worrying about your virginity, start worrying about more important matters like furthering your education, or pursuing a job. Also, if it's really bothering you, I would advise talking to a therapist about this.

    • Herpes isn't a big deal at all like 50% of adults over 30 have it genital herpes already

    • @Personontheinternet "Also, hooking up isn't all that cracked up to be." You're only 16, so you could be forgiven for saying something like that. But think a little further: no sex also means no girlfriend or wife, that's the real issue which is something women don't seem to grasp most of the times this topic comes up.

  • I almost did not comment, but I have very little to no nice things to say about you strictly from this post. All I am about to say is coming from a fellow male virgin (myself and by choice)

    Are there terrible women? Yes, but plenty of amazing, wonderful ones too.

    You being a virgin is your issue, it is not the fault of anyone else. Women are not obligated to have sex with you (when married both partners are obligated to have sex with each other, but not before then). I am a virgin because it is my choice and I am focusing on school a bit before I get into a serious relationship, yes there are many women who rejected me, but they are not the right ones for me, someday I will find that special woman and I will treat her with loads of love and respect. When I get rejected, I do not get hostile, I simply thank them for their time, and go do something else.

    Your mother is a terrible mother and failed you as a mother, but instead of wallowing in your pain and hate, learn from the mistakes that she made and be a better person and parent than she was. (take this from someone who had an abusive father growing up)

    Hate is a very powerful and dangerous word, especially when it is used in a generalizing manner like you are. You hating all women for the actions of a few is no different nor better than women hating men for the actions of a few, and both scenarios are wrong to the utmost.

    I honestly would tell you options, but you have so much hate and anger within you, that I am not going to give you any because I would feel sorry for any woman who hooked up with you in your current state. Clean yourself up before you even consider going into a relationship, I am serious.

  • Anyone who reads this knows women are not the ones with the problem.

    "without seeing those Victoria's Secret angels' images blown up on screen. Then knowing that you will never be able to sleep with any of them."
    Models do not look the same in person without their professional makeup and photoshop as they do in the media. I know, I have dated several models and a couple of actresses. They are pretty, but not incredible like you think they are when they wake up in the morning. Most people wouldn't even recognize a famous person they have only seen with professional make up when she is without it.

    " It is observing their mating habits and knowing that they will never sleep with guys like us. That they only want the players and assholes."
    Yes, the great women will never sleep with losers. No, they do not only want players or aholes. They want confidence, success, ambition, and power (money).

    Lucky for you, there are plenty of women who do not have high standards and who would have sex with you. Just look on Craigslist or Backpage and ask them how much.

  • I'm a girl who never even kissed a boy. Not because I never dated, my ex boyfriends have insisted me a lot, but I refused. I wanna save every form of physical intimacy until marriage and because of that I have the right to demand for a guy like that too, and pre-marital sex isn't even common here and nor is any other physical intimacy more than holding hands and kissing one-two times, maybe. So I have plenty of men like that for me in future.

    I thought this take would be something nice about being a virgin and how great it is to save it for marriage, but I got this... utterly disappointed.

  • *sigh* To all the women who read that, I am sorry. I promise not all male virgins are whiny little assholes, even though they seem to be the loudest

  • Goddamn... you do your username justice...

  • that is bs im a male virgin i most certainly do. not quite the opposite i only dislike bad people i hate evil but not people the problem here is your inability to forgive

    • "dislike bad people" why you find good Girl? still it's nothing!, Good Girl kiss to Bad boys. don't forget that "friendzone" is a crime waste of life.

  • I think you need to find something in your life that gives you a purpose (that isn't white nationalism which is what it sounds like you subscribe to), women aren't attracted to men who chase them for their own sake, they are attracted to men who have a clear purpose in life and work hard at it. Find your goal, and the women and everything else will fall into place soon enough.

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  • I get it. I was once the nice guy virgin who wad constantly friend-zoned, rejected and sometimes ridiculed by women, and I totally understand where you're coming from. It's completely pointless trying to explain it to people who've never experienced it, especially women.

    I eventually managed to sort myself out though and got pretty good with women. If you want any advice on how to do that PM me.

  • A lot of virgins are a virgins for a reason. Some have deep rooted psychological issues, which sounds like your situation. Most things are psychological anyway. I'm a person who believes that people are their own biggest obstacle in life, though when things are all messed up in the mind, that's hard to fix. I'd suggest counseling because the average virgin doesn't have deep seeded hatred towards the other gender.

    • Lol ur so right! Totally agree.

  • Ok, let's just be clear here. Getting sex will get the monkey off your back sure, but ultimately it won't make you feel much better after a while if you still struggle at attracting women and are still lonely. I lost my virginity a couple of months ago... to a really obese girl. Met her online, she was pretty cool. So I figured I'd meet for a drink and that led to me going back to hers and having sex 3 times that night which I certainly didn't want at first. Admittedly, I had to be a bit of an arsehole to get her attracted to me. Though I didn't do it on purpose. I was being honest when I said I liked her personality but found her too large for me. Well whatever I did the deed and now I try move on and find someone I actually like more. She digged it because I was HONEST and didn't care about what she'd think of me for my opinion. Key here is BE YOURSELF AND WOMEN WILL BE ATTRACTED TO YOU.

    But, YOU have to go out and find the women. They won't come to you. It sucks, but that's life as a man. Focus on taking ACTION!

    I think the issue here is you feel crap for not having options. I feel the same, even after losing my virginity. Honestly, it has barely changed a thing for me except that I don't have to hide being a virgin anymore. You need to practice meeting women to get the confidence and skills to attract them. I did a dating course a year ago which has helped. But ultimately you still have to go out there and find women who are a match to you. You can't force someone to like you and have sex with you.

    You were right to reject the friend zone, minus making her feel like shit. Accepting the friend-zone hurts you more seeing the girl regularly that you can't get to know intimately so right move there on your part to let her go so you can find someone that likes you.

    Just know that there is much outside of your control like a women's decision whether or not she is attracted to you. So focus on what you can control...

    For example:
    1. You can go out at weekends and meet girls at bars, clubs etc gaining confidence and having fun interacting with women
    2. You can approach in the day
    3. You can ask for phone numbers and if they say yes...
    4. You can ask them on dates
    5. If dates go well you can escalate physically, flirting, touching, kissing etc
    6. After a while invite them to your place and if things go well you can TRY progress to sex. They can still reject this if they aren't ready but you made a DECISION to take action and for that you can be happy.

  • Dude, just being able to admit it is the most difficult part of the battle.

    Work on the bitterness and resentment first, understand and accept them and where they've originated from. Now, this is the hard part, accept the fact that you're responsible for them still being in your life. Realize that you have the power to decide how you feel and let go of them.

    Focus on self-love and you'll attract love back to yourself.

    I know that what I'vr said isn't easy, but it'll help you more than you can know if you can pull it off, I promise you that.

  • I kept reading past "I hate women", but you totally lost me at "Jewish leftist media"; you're not getting any because you're a horrible, bigoted person and people can tell. Nobody owes you love or sex.

    • Yeah... I don't know how a guy can write an entire myTake about hating women and still be confused about why he's a virgin.

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