Is asking sexual questions same as sexual harassment?

[Anonymous]

I was flirting with this woman and she's a virgin and is single so I asked her whether she masturbates or not. Some girls masturbate and some don't. I think it was a normal question but she called it sexual harrasment.

[AshleyTaylorDanny]

With sexual harassment the other persons view or feelings is the only thing that matters in proving sexual harassment... if they say they found it harassment then it is.

[Asker]

So technically anything can be sexual harrasment if the other person says so?

[AshleyTaylorDanny]

Yes... it doesn't matter how you meant it... only how they take it... so if they say its harassment then they can report you to the boss... you would be warned and probably have to go through sexual harassment training

[Asker]

I am glad I am not with her.

[cherryblossomXD]

If the question makes them feel uncomfortable, then it's harassment.

[Asker]

So technically anything can be sexual harrasment if the other person says so?

[cherryblossomXD]

Yeah but it has to be reasonable. Like they can't say the other person asked them how are they and then claim it to be harassment lol

[Asker]

This woman is 30+ and is a virgin. This fact boggles my mind. So I asked her if she masturbates or not, there are a lot of asexual people. A normal yes and no would have been sufficient. I still don't see how that is sexual harrasment other than the fact that she says so.

[cherryblossomXD]

Asking people about their personal sex life is harassment when they don't want you to ask them that. I would be uncomfortable too if a coworker asked me that!

[Asker]

I was flirting with her and she was accepting my flirt and she's a random chick, not my coworker. We were talking for hours. It's not that I just randomly asked her something personal.

[cherryblossomXD]

Well was the flirting sexual before you asked about masturbation

[Asker]

I asked her if she was virgin. I asked her why is she a virgin. So yeah! I was asking about sex related stuff.

[cherryblossomXD]

Masturbation can be a bit more personal than those questions of virginity.

[Asker]

I don't care anymore. I hope she has a good future.

[cherryblossomXD]

Okay good

[AFellowWeeb]

okay imma be honest i had to check ur profile, but did u just really said this? u were praisng female humiliation porn? well what i said in other post made all sense i guess

[cherryblossomXD]

Lol its just a fantasy. In real life, I'm not down for it. I think you just need to be more open man.

[AFellowWeeb]

tahts not sexual harrassment but u shouldn't make strangers feel unconfortable

[AFellowWeeb]

ho yeah open to hypocrisy? fantasies are ur deepest desires simple, something u dont have the balls to do irl, but u wanted to

[cherryblossomXD]

What are you talking about? I'm not harassing anyone? Everyone can be a hypocrite so yeah you can call me one lol like I said people are complicated.

[AFellowWeeb]

u get what i meant now? on the other post? how u want us to see u as genuine, when u pull out responses like that? its kinda hard to receive help from someone like that, thats the main reaosn that guy was having a mental breakdown, its hard to trust in people like u that act one way to someone, but when u find someone ure interested in, u become adifferent person, for ur info, i saw a post on facebook that a group of brazilian women were talking one asked 'Ladies if ur walking at night through an allay and a hot dude pulls u to the darkness, will u fk him?' all of them said yes, one even said, ''bc he's cute, if he wasn't, id call it sexual harrasment'', im not even joking i can try to find it but its in portugues so u have to translate, even tho i already did it, u see what i meant with the hypocrisy?

[AFellowWeeb]

thats the 50 shades of grey syndrome

[AFellowWeeb]

i called u hypocrite bc u just told this guy, just bc he asked that to that girl, its harrassment, while fantasising rape, bruh, What? and those other girls that i mentioned are just like u, u only care for apearences, if this guy was hot, asking that, u would treat him 'he's just funny' or 'quirky'

[Asker]

Stop it @AFellowWeeb

[cherryblossomXD]

Lmao people have the right to feel comfortable to what they want. Everyone's comfort level is different and greatly is related to the relationship you have with the person. It is sexual harassment if the girl he is asking doesn't like that he is asking that. Then she can go home and masturbate to whatever the fuck she wants because its her choice. If a random hot guy asked me that, I would feel uncomfortable too.

[cherryblossomXD]

Its the internet, take everything with a grain of salt because you're really coming over to another question to comment about me lol

[AFellowWeeb]

'bc he's cute, if he wasn't, id call it sexual harrasment' - woman responding to a queastion ' what if a guy pulled u on a dark alley and raped u ''; well i guess ur a 'quirky' different girl too right? quit the hypocrisism, admit, u would allow a hot dude to harass u

[AFellowWeeb]

cause u were responding to the other guy, saying that u wouldn't like a dominat 6 ft tall hung boyfriend, but then u have rape MALE DOMINAT fantasies, and like i said, fantasies are ur deepest desires that u dont have the courage to do it, thats why a lot of women have rape fantasies, thats the harsh truth, bc that way they can act innocent while engaging in said abilities, am i right? ur the psychologist, right?

[cherryblossomXD]

Okay why do you care so much about me? You want me to just agree with everything you say to make you happy and then you'll stop trying to argue with me. Rape is fucking rape no matter who and I dont think anyone would ever want it no matter who. People say dumb shit on the internet even when they don't mean it in real life. Like me. End of story lol 😆

[AFellowWeeb]

is not about u, is who i am, i saw the other guy was sad, and ur replies were terrible and not genuine, the typical internet fake replies to give fake hope to people, ur studying for psycologist, right? then u should know it when a random no one on the internet can goe toe to toe and shut up a person that their whole job is argumenting, and helping others, being hypocrite, is not helpfull, if u knew me irl u would know that im fully about equallity, i hate disorder, and im pretty realistic stubborn, straightforward, i know this argument will take us nowhere, but still, i felt like i had to say this, cause like i commented b4, this shit is annoying, specially ur bias answar to this guy, that just asked a stupid question, i had that same question asked to me when i was 16, by a girl, and is just mildly unconfortable, not harassment, tahts why i said ur part of the problem, bc u only allow more atractive guys to enter ur bubble, if the guy isn't on ur taste, is harrasment, WRONG, this is bias and is why feminism is toxic, u know, what u were saying on other post about it where u agreed with us, then u came here to contradict urself, but yeah cya

[cherryblossomXD]

Its just my opinion. I like short guys and don't care for hung guys. Thats all I said lol. I know it doesn't affect him in anyway. I didn't badmouth him, I just stating my truth. He can take it or leave it. Just like you. I dont like hot guys because I find them intimidating, you know. Thats why I like average nerdy guys 😉 I appreciate you taking the time to put me in my place with your long heart felt paragraphs. I'm not trying to be psychologist by the way it was a joke. But I like you, you fascinate me with your pov. Let's chat some more some time!

[AFellowWeeb]

i dont want to chat with anyone from here ''I dont like hot guys because I find them intimidating, you know. Thats why I like average nerdy guys '' tahts why u have rape fantasies by the way, bc nerdy guys cannot fk u like u would wish see, basic mind logic by the way loved ur condescending tone, too bad it doesn't work on me

[cherryblossomXD]

Oooo i like how smart you are. Doing your research on some cat called cherry blossom on the internet. I like nerds because I can relate to them better and I dont really care for sex much because it gives me anxiety issues at the moment lol.

[Asker]

Why does it give you anxiety?

[cherryblossomXD]

Because I can't have sex at the moment. I have vaginismus or something related to it. I need professional help.

[Asker]

What happens in that? How do you feel?

[cherryblossomXD]

It is basically a muscle spasm where your vagina tightens up and it becomes uncomfortable or not possible to enter it with anything. I tried to have sex, but my ex said it was like hitting a wall. Could not enter. Tried a couple times. Never worked out. I also feel like stinging pain when using just my finger even when I am really turned on. So it is very complicated for me.

[Asker]

Maybe it's something related to psychology. Maybe you feel as if you're not ready. I watched a video where a sex doctor said that she had the same issue.

[cherryblossomXD]

Yeah it can be a issue mentally. I know that because I feel anxiety about it being closed. It will tense up and become closed because I think it will be. Therefore, it it difficult for me to overcome. That is why I want some professional help soon and probably need some physical remedies for now. Thank you.

[Asker]

Use lube and take deep breaths while going in. I once helped a girl put butt plug in her asshole online through video call.

[cherryblossomXD]

lol yeah that is kind of funny. I think I tried lube one time and it went in but it was still so uncomfortable for me. I just need to relax.

[Asker]

All the best! If you need my help, feel free to ask. We can video call 😏

[cherryblossomXD]

Ok thanks lol

[boggboss]

Its dependent on how the other person feels about it

[Asker]

So technically anything can be sexual harrasment if the other person says so?

[AustinMan]

It depends on the context. Where were you?

[Asker]

Online.

[AustinMan]

Had the conversation had sexual overtones at that point?

[Asker]

Yeah!

[AustinMan]

Then she's full of it.

[Agape93]

Yeah it is. If she feels harassed by it, guess what? That makes it harassment.