Is getting a bj that hard for men? Do you ask for it or is it given spontaneously?

I ask because I just broke up with a jerk who I sucked every chance and he acted like its the least I can do

Most girls like to suck and willingly partake without being asked
Vote A
You can tell they aren't into it so you don't bring it up
Vote B
Sometimes it takes some convincing
Vote C
Some women just won't
Vote D
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Most Helpful Guys

  • I would say that probably 60-70% of men get them less than once every couple of years if they are single, and somewhat more often if they're in a relationship. The top 10% of guys get them constantly, because girls will do just about anything to get and try to keep their attention. The guys in between get them fairly regularly, but not nearly as often as the top 10% guys.

    Obviously there's also going to be some variation at the individual level.

    Personally, I've never had much trouble getting them when in a relationship, but I also take good care of my girl, sexually and otherwise, and I always have. I figured out very early that keeping my relationship healthy was highly likely to keep the sex-life healthy too.

    While I agree that people shouldn't reward their partner with an amazing sex-life if they treat you badly (you should address the problems immediately and not let them fester, and you should end the relationship if things don't improve after a bit of time), the opposite is also true: if your partner works hard to make your relationship great, you should reward that by making it great too, and that includes sexually.

    Too many people seem to do the opposite, and wonder why their relationships don't last. If you get rewarded for bad behavior and punished for good behavior, what do you suppose you are going to get from your partner?

  • 😫 I couldn't tell you, but I'm jealous. I'd never take something like that for granted.

    • thank you how did you manage to embed kindness into your reply

    • That was supposed to be more of an 'exhausted' emoji. At least on Windows 10 you should be able to do it by pressing the Windows key + Period key, which brings up a small window with emojis that you can click on to add them to the comment.

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What Girls & Guys Said

6 27
  • i give them pretty spontaneously... often you just feel it... and it's so natural after tongue kissing... i do know some girls like giving head more than others... with me it wouldn't be so difficult to get one.

  • It depends on if you waste your time with women who don't like you. You can call him a jerk now, but you wouldn't have been so eager to please him if you didn't like him a good bit. Generally you don't place someone's happiness too high on the priority list unless you're very much into them.
    I'd say guys and girls who have issues getting what they want out of their partner are likely with partners who have them much lower on the priority list. I mean, it happens, I tend to pursue relationships where it is imbalanced and they like me more than I like them.

  • Getting a BJ is pretty simple. But at the same time, I'm willing to give them pretty easily too.

    If a guy wants a blowjob, and he's flexible about who he gets it from, he just needs to go on Grindr and say what he's looking for.

    Most guys won't even mind if he watches straight porn while he gets it.

  • As a guy, and married one, I can start by saying that since we are so exposed to porn, in a our mind getting served is a pleasurable thing. It's not always about the satisfaction bj gives, its the sensual imagination of being treated by someone whom you for a short moment considers to be lower than you (e. g seen as a pornstar).

    Your partner can therefore especially if your in a relationship, whether man or women, feel degrading about giving oral. The idea of being treated as in the movie or even handled as in the movie can be degrading.

    When I used to received bj from randoms or friends with benefits, I used lead them down their or they felt the need to give me bj because I pleasured them. In those moments, the same imagination as above came upon myself and I enjoyed it. However, as a married guy, my wife do spontaneously go down on me, but I don't let it go to far. Once harder, I move her quickly closer to me.

    And for the record, I have never been able to receive ejaculation with only receiving bj. I have always used my hand to pop.

  • I don't think it's that hard for a guy to get a bj without asking. a lot of girls are willing to suck them

  • As a lifelong celibate fincuck, I've become so accustomed to having a sexual life that consists solely and exclusively of masturbation that receiving fellatio does absolutely nothing for me, in terms of physical pleasure. The only circumstances under which oral sex is a viable method of intimacy is when she receives it and I provide it.

    • what the heck is a fincuck?

    • A fincuck is a delightfully useful combination of a traditional male pig, and a cuckold, which adds another dimension to the arrangement. Unlike many pigs, a fincuck is driven by his need to serve the woman's boyfriend or husband, rather than trying to tiptoe around him. This often results in her boyfriend's greater interest in her pig.

  • I never had to "ask" for it...

    but I sure have, inspired or enticed for it... and then, you also have reciprocation as well, and there's also those who really love it and it's something they actually want

    but, I've only been in situations in which we've been VERY into each other... so, more than keen to give and receive not just this but many other things as well...

  • I personally love giving head. I’d do it multiple times a day on top of sex as well

    • Your man must be exhausted!😂

    • lol yes but he’s used to it now

    • *OMG*😳 Is it hot in here, or what?🥵

  • Some women really don't like it, others do.
    It doesn't hurt to ask, but if they are not into it respect their decision.
    Also make sure you reciprocate, or end up 69.

  • I've found that a lot of women like to give head, but not many know how to do it well, so you have coach them on how to take care of you.

  • Half of my ''encounters'' during my career until now would be open to give it; the other half did not.

    Apparently, a majority did not have a clue about what feels right. I'm either unlucky, or that's the general situation.

    A bit unfair... because myself, I studied and graduated in pussy science.

    As per presently, I can't complain, though. She gives what she can. And where ''professionalism'' is missing, she compensates with lots of other affection :)

  • I give it spontaneously to my husband, but I understand why some women hate it. It can feel degrading.

    • Why?

  • I don’t ask for it. I’m more of a giver than receiver anyways

  • Whenever I look at a porn site, and see bjs I click off onto something else. BJs are just not my thing.

  • My wife has never turned me down, but she's not super sexual so I don't ask it from her often. It's more enjoyable when the girl wants/needs to do it.

    Sex has never been difficult to get, good sex is fairly difficult for me since I'm hard to get off.

  • It hasn’t been for me, and I don’t recall having to ask. Actually, they’ve been offered and given pretty enthusiastically, for the most part.

  • I have a chick who all I have to say is get into your position and she does it.

    • Well that’s novel. Did you need a whip to train her or just a leash? 🤔😉😳

    • @RedInnocent68 Na she'll do it whenever but sometimes we use both for fun.

  • They give it, usually want to do a good job and enjoy it

  • I've never had to ask and have never felt deprived of it because I always return the favor and make it a priority to do what she needs first. When you're not selfish you get more head.

  • Sometimes they will start with a handjob which I love and then they will go to a bj or I might say can you suck on it a bit also.

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