Is he masturbating?

[Anonymous]

My husband always go in the garage to smoke cigarettes, not sure if he smokes his vapor or not, he told me he's gonna stop cause it gives him acne. He also does weed in the garage. Anyways, he always take so damn long. I found this bag next to the spot where he sits to smoke, he sits behind the heating chamber. The bag is full of used, rolled up, toilet paper. I checked the toliet paper, and most of them are crusty w yellow stains, some are wet. Usually when he uses it to wipe his vapor, the toilet paper would has some black stuff to it, and he rolls it up like as if he's using it to clean the inside of his nose.

He just leaves it out in the open, its like he thinks im stupid, and wouldn't suspect it. He does not have a cold. Im upsey about yes, because why can't he just have sex w me when im available everyday and night? And never rejected him? How should i confront him about it?

[Lovelinefan]

How's your sex life? How often do you guys have sex?
Masturbation and sex are not really the same. Even if he's quite happy having sex with you, there will still probably be a need for him to spend some time alone with himself. It's not necessarily a sign that he's unhappy or unsatisfied with sex with you, it's just something guys do.
It sounds like you're taking it personally that he masturbates.
Don't. It's not personal.

Now, if you're unhappy with the amount of sex you have with him, I wonder if there's more problems in the relationship that need to be dealt with. But if everything else is good and you guys are having sex several times a week and this is just something he does in addition to that, don't get upset with him.

[Asker]

Our sex life is bad, he loses it a lot, and gets tired easily. He wasn't like this before. Its always like this and hed put the blame on me. And he is no longer able to look at me. He only wants sex 3-4x a mth. I take it personal because he imagines doing those women. And i feel like he's losing attraction to me because my body is not at all like those women. Not that im fat, im skinny and tiny as hell.

[Lovelinefan]

How long have you been together? What's your relationship in general like?

[Browneye57]

This would be a question for HIM. Like anyone here has any idea of what your husband is doing. LOL

You two need a serious sit-down discussion. Perhaps some third party help as well. Lots of red flags.

Oh, and none of what you describe causes acne.

[Nubxei]

Don't be angry about it, guys enjoy a wank, it's a natural sign not a red flag. I know you want to be involved when he gets off but you have to approach this with an appetite for sexual curiosity. Try to avoid the whole "I know what you've been up to" sort of vibe.

[razeoes]

sex and masturbation are different, and equally as important, aspects of a relationship

[Maximus_Prime_66]

Go, be like, yo, you been jacking off in the garage? You could have a better time in the bedroom ya know? Always works

[ravedave]

Wait you seriously have a problem with your man masturbating? Lmfao, good luck, almost every guy is going to masturbate, even if they're in a relationship

[Asker]

Yes because he does it and imagine fucking them.

[ravedave]

Lemme clue you in on something: 1] Like I said, 98% of guys masturbate no matter if they're single, in a relationship, or married. 2] It doesn't mean he wants you any less, it doesn't mean he doesn't find you attractive, it doesn't mean the sex is bad. We watch porn because sometimes we want to indulge in fake, erotic fantasy. We know it doesn't represent reality, and that's one of the biggest draws. Plus, sometimes it's nice to just spend some time masturbating

[dilligaff]

First off, cigs nor vapor will give him acne... Lol.
He probably is jacking off but that is a natural thing And you shouldn't get mad.

[awesometjgreen]

why are you mad about that? And you don't know what's in those tissues, it could be snot for crying out loud!

[eagle1951]

either ask him, or put a camera in there where he can not see it. and find out what he's doing.

[rahulsood]

do u know what all he likes in sex and are you guys doing those stuffs

[Anonymous]

Why does it matter? Everyone masturbates, it is a normal human stress release. You masturbate sometimes I am sure and you could just give him sex, but sometimes we just don't want sex and all the bullshit that comes with it.

You sound controlling. No you shouldn't confront him.

[Asker]

Because he imagines doing them and i can see it affecting our sex life. If his perspective isn't that he imagine fucking them, i wouldn't mind, but it is. And its prob just gonna lead to him cheating on me. Or even lose attraction. Im sure he found a womens body that he's so into, he wishes i have that body. and no im not controlling.

[Opinion Owner]

Women have fantasies that don't involve their partners. The most common female sexual fantasies are sex with a stranger and the rape fantasy. Fantasy has nothing to do with reality. Women who have rape fantasies don't actually want to be raped. It's a very narcissistic mindset to believe that his fantasy is somehow different and wrong. The only thing that will lead to him losing attraction is you getting bent out of shape about something natural that he can't simply shut off and making him feel guilty about it. You are making the very typical female comparison that men must compare you to other women because as a woman you compare yourself to other women. Truth is, we don't! Men do not generally compare any part of our partner to any part of other females, especially those in fantasy.

[Anonymous]

Why don't you initiate Mam?