Is it fatphobic to prefer a partner who is not fat?

[AskingToughQuestions]

[Bilboes]

No, and everyone has a certain gender, race, and body type that they find attractive. Therefore, the perception of beauty will always remain subjective. And making a choice according to these perceptions does not make you a racist or a fatphobic.

[MrNameless]

No its not phobic.

Everyone has their own dating preferences and values. Usually people want to date someone with similar values as they do.

I'm fairly lean, very physically active (walk a lot, gym,), and I eat fairly healthy. I don't mind dating overweight, but it's a no for me on obese. I'm not physically attracted to obese women, and the goals may not align with mine in terms of physical activity and health.

[MrNameless]

I want to date someone who is healthy or makes an effort to do so. A similar lifestyle to me. Someone who has good genes that we can pass on to our kids. I'm sure there's a lot of obese people out there who are trying hard, but I' not physically sexually attracted to them, and I don't want to put in effort to make them healthy. That's up to them.

[tiamatx]

Being fat is super unhealthy. Apart from some exceptional circumstances (like maybe genetic mutations or a serious illness) it also means weak mind unable to stop overindulging. So I do prefer people who take care of themselves at this basic level. I like curvy women, but for god's sake, there is a difference between being curvy and being fat.

[musicbrain5]

No, it’s not. “Fatphobic” to me means that you outright hate fat people or are afraid of them, just because they’re fat. Like you don’t even want to be in the same room as a fat person, no matter if they’re a man or a woman.

[OlderAndWiser]

Why does having a preference result in a knee-jerk response of being labeled "______phobic?" This sounds like woke culture running amok.

[LazerBean]

No, that's just called being smart.

[Apple1996]

100% yes weight shouldn't matter anyways since you should only be with someone for who they are not what they look like

[MrNameless]

I disagree. Everyone has their own preferences, and values. I don't mind dating fat women, but I won't date obese. I'm physically active and eat fairly healthy myself, and I want someone with a similar goals/mindset.

[Apple1996]

@MrNameless a fat person could be active and eat healthy as well. And a person could also change after dating them so having this as a preference is stupid beyond belief. Nobodies weight stays the same overtime

[MrNameless]

Obese women can eat healthy and be physically active. I'm sure many do. That's one part of the equation. Having that healthy mindset. I'm not normally physically attracted to obese women.

[Apple1996]

@MrNameless so if you are relationship and she randomly gets obese are you gonna leave cuz of not being physically attracted to her?

[OlderAndWiser]

I think it is naive to think that appearances "shouldn't" matter. Everyone I have ever known has preferences and I've never heard anyone say that they consciously chose those preferences. No, they just seem to be built into us. We have brains but we are still animals!

[Apple1996]

@OlderAndWiser I literally never heard of people having preferences prior to coming on this site. It's not something built into us from nature. Maybe built in from society tho

[OlderAndWiser]

That is ASTOUNDING to me! Girls have preferences for guys height, weight, muscular build, intelligence, and some are size queens. Guys have preferences based on height, weight, build, boob size, butt size, hair color, tone of voice, and others. I've never met anyone who truly had no preferences, though I have met some virtue signallers (and I am NOT calling you a virtue signaller) who wanted to pretend that they would date any guy, regardless of their appearance.

[Apple1996]

@OlderAndWiser it's just not something I hear people talk about irl. Seems like a chronically online type of thing. And yeah I'm aware of these preferences now after being on here and some other similar sites

[OlderAndWiser]

I think I'll post a poll on that question!

[Apple1996]

@OlderAndWiser I'm sure I'm just a odd one out. There was a question here the other day about preferences and no one was agreeing with what I said lol

[OlderAndWiser]

I would never call you "odd!" If you are interested:

Do you have physical criteria/preferences for a dating partner and did you deliberately choose whatever your preferences are? ↗

[MrNameless]

I will make sure that we get physical and work out together. Nobody just randomly gets obese. There's always a reason. Pregnancy or depression can be worked around. Working out helps a lot in managing weight and feeling god. If it's an illness that she gets that she has no control over, I'm not gonna leave her. Someone who is generally fit, will have that mindset to want to stay in shape. VS someone who is obese who also happens to not work out and eats terrible.. I'm not gonna date that person at all.

[Apple1996]

@MrNameless what if she just wants to be fat?

[curlyfirecracker]

We all have types, ideals, and preferences

[Gent207-2]

If forcing gay men to have wives is frowned upon, why should it be any different with people's bodily preferences?

Has the media and porn messed up societal standards for beauty and attractiveness? YES

[catarecute]

being fat in unhealthy there is nothing phobic about this its science.

[roseloyaa]

No 😂 you don't control what you prefer. It's okay to have preferences

[stepyo99]

The only people who would think so are fat and de facto their opinions don't matter.

[Apple1996]

I'm not fat and I think that it's fat phobic

[stepyo99]

@Apple1996 You're also a stupid woman. Another opinion that doesn't matter. Not wanting to have a relationship with a fat person is just a normal, healthy attitude. Being fat is a choice that demonstrates a person's uncaringness for their own health and well-being.

[Apple1996]

Some people don't choose to be fat. It can be in their genes or health issues. And it doesn't make me stupid to think that way I'm just not shallow and understand how weight works. Not everyone that's fat is lazy

[stepyo99]

@Apple1996 Not only are those genetic conditions rare, but they can be mitigated by proper diet and exercise. Over 80% of the United States is overweight or obese. You're telling me that's all genetic? Not every fat person is lazy, but

[Apple1996]

It can definitely be genetic. Also weight gain is a side effect from many meds such as anti depression meds and birth control. Which lots of people on the US take

[stepyo99]

most are and the ones who aren't, aren't fat for long. Usually it was some minor lapse of will and self-esteem and then they got their shit together again.

[stepyo99]

@Apple1996 lmao 250 million people in the US are just genetically predisposed to be fat. It's not because of their excess calorie intake and sedentary lifestyle. Like I said before, stupid woman, you're opinion doesn't matter.

[Apple1996]

Our bodies are literally built to hold on to fat to stay alive. It's normal for people to be fat as you said 80%. It's very obvious that you are fat phobic 😂

[stepyo99]

@Apple1996 Thank you, yes, I do hate fat people. Having a normal percentage of body fat isn't unhealthy and it's not what I'm talking about either. And nobody needs to be overweight or heavier in the US for survival because food is plentiful here. That's why people get fat, stay fat, and even die an early death from being a fat tub of lard. But I wouldn't think too hard about these things, stupid woman, they'll take up valuable brain cells you use for walking and breathing simultaneously.

[Apple1996]

It's necessary for some people depending on their lifestyle. I've spent the last 3 years trying to keep on weight but it's really difficult due to burning so many calories a day. It's not healthy for everyone to be have a average bmi

[exitseven]

No, some people do not like fatties. Everyone has preferences.

[TheSpaceGnome]

Obesity is unhealthy, a phobia is an irrational fear.

It is not irrational to fear poor health, therefor it cannot be called a phobia.

[es20490446e]

It's not the same rejecting someone as a person, than rejecting them as a partner.

[AnotherDay88]

Telling someone who doesn't fat people to date one, is like telling vegan to have a steak. It's stupid!

[Brady]

Everyone can choose anything about their partner.

[shades777]

no it's preference, that implies your afraid of a fat bitch, unless your actual afraid of Lizzo then your fatphobic

[Jmmmfi4]

No it's just preference

[briigantexx]

I love fat and curvy women 😍😍😍 they are my life 😍😍😍😍

[Anonymous]

Never !
I don't care if it offends anyone but everyone has preferences

[Anonymous]

It is a borderline thing.

[BoopBoopBeep]

There's no borderline there. I'm not attracted to fat women. I prefer a partner that isn't. That's like saying it's "borderline homophobic" because I won't date a guy. People need to look up what the word "phobic" means. "having or involving an extreme or irrational fear of or aversion to something" I don't like them. I'm not afraid of them. My aversion isn't irrational. They're less attractive and less capable of keeping up with me in any of a multitude of activities I enjoy.