Sexual Relationships
10 mo

Is it normal that I think giving a man blowjobs is disgusting?

Hi! So I’m a 22 year old female who is a virgin and has not done anything sexual with a man thus far.

One thing that has always bothered me about sex is blowjobs.

Like I don’t understand how women enjoy giving bj’s to a man.

I find it very disgusting to place my mouth on a man’s genitalia (full of germs/bacteria) and allow him to also eject his disgusting wet sperm into my mouth.

And wait a minute…. I’m supposed to swallow it? Oh nooo.

I feel like such an outsider talking about this because almost every female seems to be totally fine with doing this act.

Is there something wrong with me for thinking this way? Is there anyone here that also thinks like me? 😭
3 5

Superb Opinion

  • Firstly, you're not obliged to give oral sex if you don't want to. In fact, I'd rather not receive it. I prefer to give, then to have penetrative sex. Oral I find to be a waste of time. This is where communication comes in.

    Secondly, full of germs and bacteria? I mean, technically, yes. All human bodies have their own fauna, my understanding is that we have 10x as many germs and bacteria than we have cells. Trillions of them. So we're clearly in some kind of symbiosis with them, and they're necessary for our health and functioning. Any person, man or woman, who keeps themselves clean and looks after themself, to all intents and purposes, should smell good and clean down there, and obviously this bacteria is of no harm to you.

    So the fact that you talk in such terms implies you have some kind of disgust going on. Is it towards male bodies? Towards sex? Intimacy?

    This is a complicated one. But I would suggest this deep rooted disgust towards sex, or male genitalia, or whatever it is, has some rather deep roots, that could possibly be uncovered. But that would depend on whether you wanted to go there and put the work in. I suppose it is always easiest to stay in a place of safety and we would rather not challenge our preconceptions.

    Ultimately, it's your life and your body, if you don't want to do something that's totally your choice. On the other hand, you might be missing out on something wonderful. It all comes down to what you want.

    • Hey! Thank you for your response. I wish I knew why I think this way. I’ve always been a very squeamish and picky girl. Even with food. Ever since I was a young girl, there would be certain foods on my plate that I would be disgusted with its appearance and not want to eat it. But to everyone else around me, they looked totally normal and they enjoyed eating it.

    • Okay, maybe you need a very patient partner. Do you not think you will derive enjoyment from sex?

    • Yea lol :( I definitely do think I will derive enjoyment from penetrative sex. Hopefully I will change my mind about oral as well once I experience it

    • Show All

Most Helpful Guy

  • I don't think there is anything wrong with you feeling like this. You may not continue to feel like this however when you do have sexual experience.

    Both guys and gals like to give each other pleasure. After the early inexpert fumblings it quickly becomes part of our egos that we are good at giving a loved partner enormous sexual pleasure. We take to it like ducks to water.

    A lot of women enjoy being in control of their man's pleasure and find it rewarding. Some girls do swallow, in some cases because they enjoy it or out of duty or just because it is part of 'the deal'. Some girls just won't ever. Some girls will boast at how they enjoy semen when they aren't in fact as keen as they say.

    For myself I love the stimulation but because there is nearly zero friction it is difficult for me to ejaculate in a blowjob. So I want it to be a combo hand job blowjob. I do have a fetish for being kissed on the tip though as that gives me an emotional buzz.

    As a virgin don't worry about this. It will work out. And if you never do give a blowjob there are many other ways of giving pleasure.

    Good luck!

Most Helpful Girls

  • the way you describe it sounds disgusting... i've been sucking dicks for over 20 years and i do enjoy getting on my knees for a man in a sexy short dress to suck his hard penis... i enjoy it all the pre-cum and when he cums with a nice load of cum... yes swallowing it nice as well... i think once you've given 5-10 blowjobs you'll get the hang of it and enjoy it yourself... the cum actually doesn't taste bad at all sometimes it even tastes good if he's on a certain diet... like pineapples... also cum puts you in a good mood as does sucking his penis... also if you want to have a good relationship with a man i recommend giving blowjobs on a regular basis and with a smile on your face and a good attitude.

  • I think that it's perfectly normal for you to think that. What type of sexual activity you decide to get involved in should be your choice, and should not be ruled by what others tell you is normal.

    Personally, I enjoy oral sex with my husband, but that doesn't mean that everyone should enjoy oral sex. There are other activities which people do which I think sound disgusting, and that's my own personal view and choice.

    Sex is an incredibly enjoyable activity, but you should limit what you do to what you enjoy. Nobody should be telling you to do things that you don't enjoy.

    • Thank you for your kind and understanding response! <3

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What Girls & Guys Said

14 65

  • Many had answered but none mentioned the medical side, since your question uses the word disgusting.

    Let's compare oral to kissing.

    When cleanly washed, the external of our sex organ is like our cheeks and foreheads. They are clean and free of life threatening bacterias.

    However, tasting body fluids, like saliva from mouth or cum from pensises, may pass STI.

    Hence to be fair, mouth to mouth kissing can be just as "disgusting", medically speaking.

    To conclude, oral sex can be dangerous with ONS or casual relationship. But in a committed relationship, like kissing and tonguing, oral can be extremely intimate.

    PS: sexual acts that include fluid exchange are mouth to mouth kissing, cunnilinguous, fellatio and penis in vagina intercourse without condom. And they all can spread STD and Covid-19.

    • Wow thank you so so much for your detailed and super helpful response! It all makes so much sense

    • My pleasure! by the way, since you mention that you're a virgin, no need to worry about giving your future husband fellatio, for now. Treat understanding sex by a virgin as understanding color by a blind / color blind person. In fact, try to explain a color or two like red and blue. I'm sure you can't. You may only describe colors with reference to their properties like red is hot like the sun and blue is cool like the sea. Likewise no matter how much you read, you can never understand how sex feels like until you experienced it. And experienced it you shall with your future husband. Then with this understanding of "red" and "blue", you'll discover the new shades formed by red alone, blue alone, and the combination of red and blue. There comes the understanding of how it feels to mutual masturbate, to receive cunnilingus, to give fellatio, even giving and receiving anal sex (WOW!) and anal oral (OMG!) aka rimming. Yes, no worries for now. When you finally got married, you and your future husband will have a lifetime (at least 30 years) to experience red, blue and the shades of red + shades of blue.

  • I will be the first one to say I like hot kinky sex I love going down on a girl and making it all about her. And my goal is to make her feel something so beautiful she never wants to stop


    I would rather make love fuk screw her and just make it all about her

    OK if a girl craves sucking cock and want to take it all the way that's great I love it.

    And I wouldcome any where she wanted me to... in saying that and understanding my self and knowing I have no desire to have a cock in my mouth let alone guys come in my mouth I will come anywhere I girl want me to. But I agree with you I like comming other places

    I wouldn't want a guys come in my mouth so I don't need to come in her mouth.
    Not unless that's what she wants

  • It’s perfectly fine to not like or want oral. As a guy, I’ve always thought natural vaginal sex is what’s healthy, respectful, and connecting. That’s always been my view because I respond to natural. Call me vanilla but its what I love and find to be beautiful as far as intimacy and intercourse

  • I initially considered it disgusting as well. The women in my fam look down on that and feel no woman should go down. They dont even care to receive. I tried it with one guy in my early 20s and I personally enjoyed it with him. That changed my opinion of it. But I do not intend to do it again unless I’m with someone else that I can see myself being longterm with. I’m certainly not a try everything once kind of girl, but that was just one of the few things that grew on me

  • You are normal to think like this, not every woman likes to do blowjobs on men, and the men should respect that completely, if not then that men is a " d... ". But not all men are disrespectful.

    • Then the should respect that I won't lick her pushy

    • Pussy****

    • Thats a personal choice. If it works for you sweet if not then pick someone that doesn't mind it.

  • I think it's a matter of preference. Personally, I also find it less aestetic than vaginal sex which is just a more beautiful way for the two bodies to interact. To come into her mouth would be disgusting even for myself.

    Now, for giving her oral it's a different thing as many women cannot cone from penetration alone, so I would certainly not limit the options there. This can really make a woman hot. Conversely, I find it easy to come, so I don't need it really.

  • It's not abnormal to not like to give oral love.

    Some women like to give blowjobs, some don't.

    Some men like to go down on women, some don't.

  • Not all guys enjoy blowjobs, I never have.

    • That feels so nice to hear!

  • Like I think a lot of someones thoughts about genitalia and cum change once you start having sex but like if you still dont like it then just dont do it

  • There is nothing wrong with you. We all have different likes and dislikes when it comes to sex. Do you feel any different about handjobs... guys love them and the ejaculate will not get in or on your face.

    • Yea I definitely would be more open to handjobs, as long as I don’t have to put my mouth anywhere near a genital and ingest anything coming out of it.

  • Just understand that there are plenty of women who don't mind it at all, and actually enjoy. If that's important to a guy (which it is to most) who do you think he would choose?

  • It's not normal. Seems like you just have a ick towards the male body like you think they are dirty or something. In all honesty I don't even see how people make it in a long term relationship without doing basic sexual things like oral. Things would get boring really fast. And I think even guys that "don't like oral" still would want a partner that's willing to give it to them. Since it's more the willingness to please them that can be more of a turn on then the act itself.

  • makes sense assuming this applied to all men. the moment someone would give a BJ to a hot dude over any other dude is the moment the whole BJs are disgusting goes out the window. consistency is key

  • Blowjob is shown in every porn scene but it not needed to get pregnant, so you can skip it.

    • Yes, thankfully it’s not necessary for pregnancy. But I’m hoping my future husband does not ask me to perform this for him 😭 and I don’t wanna upset him if I say no

    • Maybe you need to look for religious husband, in religion it considered sadomy. :)

      https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sodomy

    • Thank you! Yes, I believe a religious man would be most suitable for my lifestyle

    • Show All

  • Some women feel the way you do - and that's fine. Others enjoy it. What matters is that you have partner with compatible sexual interests. No right / wrong, but incompatibility is a huge problem.

  • I'm 29 and in a similar boat. I'd never like oral, neither giving neither receiving. I could t date a woman who wasn't like yourself but later 20s. Have a good day and you're fine as you are 👍🏻😊

    • For the same reasons of germs, diseases, and it's just plain odd to me. As much as people find me odd. Lol. 😀🙃

    • Hi! I am so glad to know you also think the same way as a male. Hopefully I find someone like you or at least someone who can be understanding of my situation. Have an amazing day! <3

    • You also ☮️😋✌🏻 peace vibes 👀

    • Show All

  • Most people are just chasing lust, instant gratification and sexual power. Perhaps in your case, if you were to meet someone that you had a very deep connection with, all of those things would naturally change. When you said 'full of germs/bacteria' we are in fact full of about 10 trillion of them if I remember correctly... but when you take into account our soul, our creator, our higher purpose and capacity for reverence, then all of those take on a different meaning.

    You said 'almost every female seems to be totally fine with doing this act. ' and in the same sense, they are also perfectly fine going from one partner to another once that lust wears out and then they do the same act with another multiple times. What does it mean?

    Thus perhaps you just need more meaning before the disgust will diminish.

  • i know lots of my girlfriends who find blowjobs disgusting and they’re mostly virgins, im a virgin but i find blowjobs hot because i get turned on when my man is turned on, and i also love showing my appreciation that way you know?

  • I'm not going to say what's normal or isn't, but it's not the statistical majority or women who feel the same way.

    • Yea I agree. Like I said, I always hear most women brag about how much they enjoy giving it to their mean. Unfortunately I just can’t feel the same way

    • Men*

  • Maybe you're asexual. Arousal turns off disgust in the brain but if you don't feel like having sex then it's normal that you think sex is disgusting. You don't have to do things you're not comfortable with. Online I'm sure you can find people who are not into sex. I thought I was asexual for a while too but I just have extra needs because I'm autistic. I've found a woman now that I love and I can have sex with but it took a very long time and a lot of painful trial and error. You could be completely asexual or you just need a deeper connection with someone before sex becomes appealing to you there's a lot of variations of sexuality and asexuality. You won't figure it out by tomorrow but over time you'll know who you are and what you want.

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