Is literally asking someone to "hook up" too blunt?

[Anonymous]

When you're trying to hook up with someone like at a party or something, is it okay to just ask if they want to hook up, or is that too straightforward? Would it be better to just ask if they want to go back to your place and hang out or something like that? I think I'd prefer to be straightforward because that way intentions are clear and there isn't confusion, but I also don't want to be off-putting. And lastly this assumes there was some kind of conversation going, not just walking up to someone and having that be your first words to them

[Theguyoverthere]

Unfortunately this area's a double standard with girls as most girls have the mentality that they're "being used" and skip over the idea that it's a shared experience. This is mostly due to parents being really protective of girls and telling them never to sleep around and such and constantly trying to shut down their sexual desires which I feel leads to many problems down the road. I don't blame parents for discouraging hook ups as they can get pregnant etc, but many overdo it.

Plus many girls are paranoid that they'll be the "school slut" and so on.

I do however, notice that women in their later years can be much more ok about it. But the problem lies within the fact that many may be divorced, trying to divorce, or have kids and so on. So it means you may be stuck listening to their drama. MILFs can be great fun, but also big baggage.

If you're going to try this route, just try and make it clear that her needs are important and do whatever you can to make it not like... 10second shitty sex.

[onetattoo29]

Yes saying you want to hook up makes you look like a douche. And only the wrong type of girls would say yes to that. I never understood just casual sex with a stranger or why people do it. To answer your question is YOU DON"T ASK IT. Not in any way. If you don't want a relationship then just tell the girl that you aren't looking for anything right now...just doing your own thing and enjoying the single life. If you make advances and she backs off then you know that NO is the answer to HOOKING UP. If she doesn't refuse you then Hooking up might be possible. Either way I think you are a douche for just wanting to hook up with girls.

[Asker]

my whole point is that I don't want to be misleading. It's fine if YOU aren't someone that looks for hook ups, but there are other girls that do look for casual intimacy, so I don't think I'm a douche for wanting that

[shacodraco]

Not everyone wants a relationship like you do, you should stop judging people for wanting to hook up. Lots of people just want to hook up.

[NovemberJoseph]

A lot of people prefer to just have sex rather than a relationship, not everyone practices abstinence until marriage. That doesn't make us assholes, if anything it makes you a douche for thinking you're better than us.

[GodLovePeace]

I think it's too straightforward. Honestly, it's way less charming than asking a girl to go out to your place and it could be seen as demeaning and slutty on your part whereas if you asked a girl to go back to your place it would be seen as more romantic lol.

But honestly I don't know. If the girl is interested in sex AND she's interested in you I imagine anything you say may catch her interest but that chance is rare. I think asking a girl to go back to your place will be way better but even most girls would find that demeaning because they know what going back to your place means :P if you say it in that way...

[Awsdrd1990]

This Is SOOO A Guy Question lol

[Asker]

this made me laugh, I feel kind of stupid for even asking it lol

[523206720]

the more blunt you are the lower your chances of getting a hook up and the higher your chances of getting a sexually transmitted disease. If you go for the easy girls - you could be diseased in 2 years.

[wanela]

Have a little mystery and it's all about being delicate about what you're actually saying, especially to women. Most women can read between the line!

[BillieJean1070]

Nothing ventured...nothing gia