Is my boyfriend not into me sexually?

so my boyfriend and I been together for 1 1/2 so almost 2 years. We see each other every Saturday and when we see one another we have sex. Almost become routine, which bothers me because my boyfriend just expects it so he doesn’t make it all romantic or whatever. I complained about him not initiating sex when we see one another and he always said he expected it so he didn’t think he needed to initiate. After I complained he made an effort to show he wanted to have sex. When we kiss a lot or even hug full on he gets hard. So that’s not an issue. But sometimes I feel like he doesn’t want to which is something I brought up and he says it’s not true. I say this because his facial expressions before we kiss is blank sometimes and he says he’s tired or when he’s irritated like we argued before. He never liked sexting or phone sexting. Was simple in his responses to my nudes like “😍 I love it baby” but he saves my nudes and dedicated a whole gallery to it. We are both broke college students and I just want to see if this is normal in our time span of relationship? My friend said it was super weird that he’s not more pushy for sex, nudes and being dirty. But when we met he wasn’t that type of guy to begin with.
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Superb Opinion

  • Do you not even hear yourself no offense? All you care about is sex. This is not even a relationship. This is just sex I'm fornication. So clarify this to you. You think a man has to want sex with you. If he doesn't have sex with you then he doesn't want to. If you don't oh you know what. Then you're not worthy of his time. Do you not realize what you're not only doing to yourself or what you're doing to this man?

    Is not about sex. And this man obviously has made it very clear he is not the type. There's only one reason why he's having sex with you all the time. And that is because you want sex all the time. Because he knows is that if he don't have sex with you all the time you're not going to want to stick around him. But now you think that he just don't want you because he's not treating you like what you think of men should treat you as like you're his bed warmer. This is no way to try to judge you or offend you I'm just literally asking you to really think and pick a step back and ask you so what the heck are you doing? And most importantly why are you even dating and what do you think a relationship is about? Because of you think a relationship is all about sex then you need to find a person who you think you're going to need sex with every day more likely. I ain't telling you to do anything that you ain't already going to be thinking about doing. But this makes no sense.

    The fact that you are having sex every weekend says a heck of a lot. The entire description says right there that this is not a relationship. This is again all about sex. All about sex. I don't care what anybody wants to deny. It's the truth. It is all about sex and all you care about is sex and presenting yourself in a manner that is not pleasing to him obviously. Not all men is only with a woman just because he wants sex. And you're not just ruining him you're ruining yourself. Sex ain't supposed to be that way and that is not what sex is all supposed to be about. It's bad enough this is done outside of marriage. Bad enough this is done outside of marriage. But you're forcing him to be somebody he's not. That is dysfunctional.

    • If you Young girls and women think that that is how a man should treat a woman? Talkin Dirty, expecting nudity, expecting sex whenever he wants it or whenever you want it then y'all don't know what it means to be not only a woman but to love yourself, to receive love from a man, and you don't even know what a good man is. Because a good man don't treat a woman like that. Bad men treat women like that. Either you want a man to love you or you want to be a man's hoe? Figure out what you want. This is why a lot of men don't have a lot of respect for women anymore. And it's bad enough a lot don't even respect themselves either. He's tired of being treated that way. And if you don't stop and don't respect him he just may God forbid go elsewhere. This sounds like a friends-with-benefits doesn't even sound like a relationship. And what makes it worse. Your friend is toxic and telling you to do and act in ways that is whorish and you want to know why you feel the way you feel. You feel unloved as a person so you use in your body thinking you're going to get love. I got news for you. It's going to leave you empty. Because you already feel empty. That's not for him to fix. That's for you to fix. It's bad enough you disrespecting yourself. But don't disrespect a man by telling him what he doesn't want to do when you are already sounding like you don't even care about what he wants. You're making this man unhappy. And sooner or later he's going to God forbid Grow miserable and want out. So what do you want to call me a religious nutcase or not. You better think wisely about why you having sex and you're not even married legally. But you married to that man in Spirit. So again ask yourself what do you want. Because I'm pretty sure deep in your heart you know that is not relationship.

Most Helpful Guys

  • Since you wrote the details, let me assume that its a single-sided story and give your part the benefit of the doubt that he is not a player.

    Some facts you wrote: you have sex whenever you meet; he gets hard when you kissed or hugged; saved your nudes and wow, have a gallery of it;

    Key point i noted: when you told him your concern, he started to express himself more.

    As a guy, I think he loves you. Ya, loves you, enough to change himself to win your heart.

    You may think "so little change", "must tell then initiate", ... but hey, he changed, for you. No matter how little, he did it.

    Reflect: what had you changed for him, even a little?

    Hence to conclude, while the guys had made some opinions, I like to speak for your partner. He loves you enough to change. I think you should love him in return. Ya, love him enough to change a little, just for him.

  • How is he not into me sexually if he having sex with you every time that he see you? if anything the main problem is that you don't see him often, meeting once a week is not much, and it hard to judge how much he would been having sex with you if he was seeing you more often. Yes he don't need to "initiate" when he knows that it going to happen anyway, a real life is not an erotic novel, and he knows you for almost 2 years, so yea sex is going to become a routine at some point, and it's normal. As for sexting and nudes, well many guys don't care about sexting, and as for nudes, he would likely rather see you nude in real life then in pictures.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • In my opinion it is not weird. See as an example imagine you go to a best restaurant every week once. And order the same thing. One day will come you will loose intrest on that food. Like that he may be having some other fantasies. Try to know what he wants and as you are saying that you are in relationship from1 1/2 year so definitely it's not losing intrest on you. Maybe he loves you but his sex fantasies are something new? You should talk to him and sort out this problem 😊

  • Next Saturday don't have sex. Or the Saturday after that. If there's a real relationship at all he'll find other things for you two to do.

    I don't know about other men but if I only saw my girlfriend on Saturdays I'd certainly initiate it as soon as I walked in the door but I'd also want to do other activites together.

    • He drives an hour to see me every Saturday and he does initiate but I feel like he wants to eat and hang out before he does. We been arguing a lot lately so also that kills the vibe but we still do.

    • I don't think there's anything wrong with what he's doing to be honest. It may be that he doesn't want you to think sex is the most important thing to him. He could be horny as hell but not want you to think that's all you are to him. May I suggest communicating your concerns to him? a lot can be accomplished by simply talking about it.

    • Definitely have told him and he said he does want to have sex and that I always assume he doesn’t kills his vibe because he’s thinking will this be good enough for her. So I’ve tried to stop overthinking

    • Show All
  • It sounds like your relationship is in a bit of a rut with a lot of things working against you including only being able to see each other once a week. Also, you both are likely working very hard at school and are exhausted and mentally drained. Are things the same between you when you have more time together, such as Christmas break?

    • I noticed a shift after he started his new job in construction! And after we had some serious problems in our relationship we are working on things now but it’s a process. I try not to over think it since he’s very affectionate like he always rubs my back puts his arm over my shoulder or around my waist.

    • Your relationships appears to have a solid foundation and you care a lot for each other. Try to find more time for each other and avoid being workaholics. Take care of each other. I wish you the best of luck. Stay healthy and safe.

  • Hey sorry for what you are going through. But he is acting very weird... watch out honestly...

  • When you do have sex how often does he have sex with you

    • Everytime we see one another

    • I meant more than one time at a time my echo only wanted it once I got wired up after the first time

    • Just once

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  • Not really bad just have to spice it up love ljfe

  • So your friend told you that men are supposed to be pushy for sex and nudes and being dirty? That's the normalcy of men nowadays? I would start with getting better friends your boyfriend seems totally fine and I would not complain about anything.

  • It's not a problem.

  • some guys are more on the conservative side

  • i go crazy for girls when i'm with them, as much sex as i can get

  • It seems as if he is sexually into you.