Is porn addiction cheating? why can’t men be sexually disciplined?

[Beelzebubbly]

According to studies, porn use causes erectile dysfunction, premature ejaculation, depression and anxiety, negative outbursts and feelings towards their partner, false views of sex and stimulation.. makes men bad and selfish lovers.. and is an addiction. my question is, how many women feel it’s cheating?

For me, I made porn for him. Pictures, videos, made our own porn for him to watch.. and it didn’t matter he still watched porn. Why? After a few months since I caught him watching, and lying to me about it.. even when I asked him.. now I am more insecure than ever. Because why would he watch other people over me? I’ve done everything “right.” Pleased him in every way, even in my period or sick.. always making sure he’s satisfied either with videos of myself or actual sex.

Women ovulate every month, and when we ovulate, our bodies tell us to find the most handsome, intelligent, strong, attractive man to procreate with.. but that doesn’t mean we do it! So why can’t men be sexually disciplined? Why would they rather their hand and someone else on a screen.. how can they tell us it’s not us and it’s not something we’re doing wrong? I’d like men’s opinions on this as well.

[Anpu23]

There is also some studies that suggest porn reduces rape and sexual violence.

Is porn cheating? Depends on the relationship, as in some relationships having sex in the club bathroom with a random stranger isn't cheating in others even glancing at an attractive person is.

To me restrictions such as porn, R rated movies and the like are a form of domination and sexual aggression. As long as your partner consents to that kind of play, all is good. Otherwise its abuse. Same as locking some guy in chastity without consent. This idea that its your dick and not his is the vibe this gives off.

People masturbate for multiple reasons, including self soothing and tension release. This idea that sex and masturbation equate is false. And not allowing this in your partner is either due to self esteem issues or simply sexual aggression. Either way it creates this dynamic:

"I don't want you to do this."

"Okay" then gets caught

"I thought we agreed..."

It builds distrust and tension in the relationship. Honesty and openness is better, and understanding on both of your parts.

For the record both me and my partner do masturbate, we both agree that we can watch porn both together and alone, and it hasn't hurt our relationship at all. 20 years and going strong.

[Anonymous]

No, porn is NOT cheating. It is visual fantasy and is no more undisciplined than a females mental fantasies. Which the most common one is being force fucked by a stranger (70% of women have this)

but because women can see male fantasy, you criticize it and shame it.

if a male attempted to force a female to stop having mental fantasy it would be called abuse.

the “studies” that claim negative are always feminist backed hyperbole because nothing pisses women off more than a male being entertained that doesn’t involve her.

Claiming porn makes men selfish and causes sexual issues is like saying chick flicks give women an unrealistic view of relationships and men and make them miserable and depressed because it creates impossible to achieve expectations.

“your porn” isn’t fantasy. he watches porn for the same reason you are in a relationship and will still watch the notebook or some other romantic crap.

You need to realize that porn has as much to do with you and how he feels about you as a chick flick has to do with how you feel about him.

[DollAlone]

I believe it is mental and emotional cheating. Especially if he feels the need to do it behind your back despite how it makes you feel. Obviously guys who watch porn and jerk off are going to try and tell you its fine and nornal. But remind them that there is men out there who watch guy on guy porn and they belive its normal as well. So if it is something that is hurting your self esteem and potentially ruining your relationship then its not normal. Also, i say that ANYTHING you can't do or dont feel comfortable doing in front of your significant other, can be considered cheating

[sheikalana]

I wouldn't say cheating but it may affect your relationship and mental health.

[Aerissa_Jade]

I would wonder why he prefers 2d videos/pics over 3d you in person, 3d is far better.

[God_of_Thunder]

What you're describing is, as you said, an addiction, but that doesn't mean that everybody (including women, since they watch porn, too) is addicted to porn.

It's not all that different than food, in that regard. Some people eat way too much, because they have a problem, but that certainly doesn't apply to every person that eats.

Lots of people have a perfectly healthy relationship with porn, and some people don't. Most people will never suffer from addiction, or experience any negative effects.

Some will, though, and those people do need help, just like overeaters, or people that drunk too much. They have a problem.

[GreenLanternI0I]

Porn is an addictive Weapon that brings destruction to a user (physically and mentally) and his family (physically, emotionally and even financially).

[Irishgirl02]

I guess. If a guy has a partner I don't think he should be masturbating unless she is in the room with him.

[Apple1996]

It's definitely cheating if it's to the point of having a addiction. I couldn't stand being with a man like that. I'd have to break it off unless he went to therapy

[Clairebear799]

Yeah it is emotionally

[HighValue]

It isn't interactive and is prerecorded. That is why it is NOT cheating. However, posting provocative pictures online for "likes" and comments IS interactive so that IS cheating.

[HighValue]

If porn was cheating, that would mean watching a movie with a sex scene would also be cheating. The non-interactivity is what makes it not cheating.

[oddwaffle]

It's like going on a diet to loose weight. Some people can but most people can't.

All the researches, doctors, coaches and plans aren't working unless the person got the resolve to do it.

If a guy jacks up too much he won't be able to cum with his girl. This shit is called death grip or something and it's real. Hell, there are guys still doing it even with his hand turning black!

[JDavid25]

"Women ovulate every month, and when we ovulate, our bodies tell us to find the most handsome, intelligent, strong, attractive man to procreate with.."

That's because you don't have easy if any access to those types of men.. So, I wouldn't call that a great parallel.. The thing is his addiction his more to do with him than you.. If that's you in the picture you are more than fine.. I'm sure he feels bad about his addiction but he needs help and a motivation to stop it.. He is a slave to it.. I don't think making videos for him will help because the more he watches the more he wants.. Not having him touch himself or watch videos (even yours) at all is the best thing for him for a long time.. When you have easy access to something that type of discipline is very hard..

[Beelzebubbly]

I see your point for sure, I thought about stopping giving him pics and videos, I feel like I’m depriving him though. I don't know 🥺

[JDavid25]

Of course.. But unfortunately while he is most likely very attracted to you, and loves you, your videos are probably lightweight in comparison to the ones that get him off unfortunately.. I think the best thing is to the deprive him and for him to deprive himself..

[misogynistic_pig]

If you want men to be sexually responsible stop sexualizing themselves, in fact women sexualize themselves to get money from men, the most blatant proof is Onlyfans where women post nude pictures to take money from men they earned working.

[Ms_Facesitter]

I think any addiction will screw with your head, cheating or not cheating it will have to stop.

[Blackmoonsns]

Because every 8 seconds of biological primitive impulse tells us to breed. Trust me we're not happy about it either it makes us do stupid decisions. When were 18 through about 30-35 we do just want to have sex for the most part but there is that biological impulse to want to impregnate a woman so that's where that's coming in the play.

[elizamichale1]

How can it be cheating honeyy

[Mansearching]

I don't like porn either. If my girlfriend would ask to watch one then why not. If she's on her cycle, I stay away... lol. At least from that area.

[SlavicThor]

Men who watch porn generally are either:

1. Unsatified with their sex/love life
2. Have zero game and look to porn for validation
3. Have a legit addiction and struggle to resist due to snowball effect and relapse

[LiamJHayden]

Porn addiction can often be classified as cheating, because it can divert affection and attention that properly belongs to an SO towards others, imaginary or not.

[Rizwan_khan]

I don't think its cheating but yes porn is like a cancer in youth now a days porn ruied sexual life of normal people because in porn there is not a single thing orignal it all scripted and specially women moaning. I feel women sounds overacting while makeing sexy sound beacuse normal women don't sound like that and normal men can't fuck for that long so yes porn is ruining life's of men and women both. I have been through and thank God i have overcome that addiction but that's was so difficult. And your boyfriend is addictive to porn it doesn't affect him whatever you send him.

[MountAverage]

Porn addiction is very harmful, both for the addicted and for their relationship with with their partner. But it's not cheating.

[Noodle_fan]

your boyfriend probably had unrealistic kink that can only happen in delusional fantasy world of porn

[swettannie]

he probably have a very big sexual need