Is Sex really THAT amazing?

I mean, i never had sex so I don't know, but do people actually enjoy it? Some of my friends told me they fake orgasm most of the times.. and they told me it hurts as well.. so if it is not because of love, why do people out of marridge enjoy sex that much? Is it worth it even if you don't love the person?
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Most Helpful Guys

  • Well, obviously, I'm not a woman. But I have known a few. I feel like I've had enough honest converations with my female friends over my life to give you some insight here. So... let me answer this as "a woman" so when I say 'sex is amazing' I am speaking about it being 'amazing' for women.

    So the short answer to your question is yes. BUT there are quite a few "But's"

    SO first, sex becomes more pleasurable after the first few time you have it. So if your friends lost their virginities fairly recently... then it's no surprise that they're describing it term of pain more than pleasure. There might be some pain (should be too bad though) your first time, and the next few times after that... but then you kinda get used to it, and then no pain at all... and it starts to feel good... quite amazing actually.

    The #1 biggest thing that will make the difference between enjoying sex or not: Your partner. And I don't mean "someone who's experienced"... I mean someone you trust. Preferably trust and care about... but trust is super key.

    So there might be a little pain the first few times. BUT you should be with a guy who's willing to be as patient as you need him to be. That can make ALL the difference in the world as far as "pain at the beginning"

    Obviously, it'll depend also on how big the guy's penis is. If it's regular-sized, it will be less painful than if it's huge. BUT... even a guy who's big can be patient and a dude's size shouldn't be a "make or break" for you in terms of being afraid it'll hurt.

    After the initial few times, once you start to enjoy sex... your partner is still key, but now there's another thing you need from him. You still need that trust, but now that you're discovering the pleasures of sex, you will have WAAAAAAY better sex, if you find a guy who's as concerned with your pleasure as his own. SOme guys are selfish. THey want sex because it feels good, but when it comes to making sure it feels just as good for you... they just don't really care. This is bad sex everytime.

    BUT the other way you can totally ruin your own sex life is by doing JUST what your friends are doing: Faking orgasms.

    That has got to be the dumbest thing a woman can do. No guy wants this.

    Here's the thing: the only reason for a woman to fake an orgasm is for the benefit of the guy. So he thinks she's had an orgasm... which makes him happy (most guys DO want to please their partner)

    Ok, But... the guy DOES NOT WANT YOU TO. I would be SO upset to find out ANY orgasm a girl had with me was fake. Like if you told me that my high school girlfriend (I'm 34) was faking orgasms (or had even faked one!) I'd totally resent her for it, and hold it against her every time she came to mind for life.
    As a guy, it's about the most insulting thing you can do. Don't do it

    Worse (for you) what it means is: bad sex. Bad sex that you tell your partner is good sex... dumb. Your partner, who wants you to enjoy sex as much as he does... believes you did! So he would gladly give you a real orgasm... using whatever 'methods' work best for you. But if you fake one... you don't get one! That's retarded...
    Faking orgasms is the best way to make sure you keep having unsatisfying sex. Why would any guy do something differently if he thought you liked it?

    • So #2 thing for enjoyable sex: Communication: You and your partner need to be comfortable enough to talk about: what you like, what you don't. What's off-limits completely, what's ok for now, what's a "maybe we'll see". Do you like sex slower or faster (it'll depend on the day, your mood). You also need to communicate verbally if, you want something done to you differently SAY SO. That especially goes for receiving oral sex. Each woman is a little bit different in what she likes. Don't be afraid to communicate.

    • Nonverbal communication is also important. You're each watching how the other person's body responds. Sometimes you won't have to say something. He'll be able to pick up on "she really likes that" or "she doesn't like this as much" etc. from your body responses. You'll be able to do the same. The last thing is: I am going to assume that you're not open to the idea of masturbation. I'm saying that only because if you were, you would know your friends are (no offence) completely full of shit. Masturbation, IF it's something you're open to... will first, help you get to know your own body better (as it relates to sexual pleasure). Second, your first time being penetrated only hurts if you aren't "used" to being penetrated... but it doesn't have to be a penis that "gets you past the slightly painful part, and into the pleasure part" But more than anything... it'll give you a much better answer to your question than anyone could here. You'll start to discover just how amazing it might be... without having to have it yet. If you give yourself an orgasm... you'll see. Your friends though... they don't know anything about sex (despite their experience). They are all just having terrible sex. Could be their partner (likely) definitely the faked-orgasms... But... the fact that their experiences of sex so far wasn't even pleasurable, is honestly sad. Don't take their advice when it comes to sex. Asking them is WORSE than not asking at all. Come on here instead... those girls will give you some really inaccurate information and personal reports about what sex is actually about

    • Omg Steve thank you so much for your long and detailed answer. I really appreciate your effort in letting me understand what it feels like. I do masturbate, and I am also open about it, more than my friends. I get a better masturbation when I watch porn but sometimes I can do also without. My girl friends instead, who had sex several times, never want to admit or say between us that they masturbate. It's like they are ashamed of it. But I am not. Also when I masturbate I never do any sort of penetration because I know that it hurts. I have had couple of people giving me oral (a boy and a girl) and they both fingered me but it wasn't pleasuring at all. That is why I never did it (considering that I have started to masturbate at a young age) and trust me even if I don't go all the way down I still have Orgasms because it is all about the clit sometimes. So I don't know.. I want to wait for the right person or someone who I really like that can like me back, but at the same time I am afraid of many things. bleeding, pain, std's. oh god

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  • I certainly enjoy it. As for my girlfriend, either she does as well or she's a fantastic actress. To be fair, she usually doesn't orgasm from sex itself, but rather from oral or fingering afterward. Still, if you're doing it right, it should feel good, not hurt (although it's normal for some girls to experience a little bit of pain the first time).

    People do it with strangers for the pleasure. However, I would strongly recommend against having sex with someone who you don't love, since it'll flood you will hormones making you feel deeply connected to the person you're with.

Most Helpful Girls

  • The best sex is with someone you trust so you feel comfortable to tell them what you enjoy so you don't need to fake any orgasms. Sex will only hurt if there is not enough foreplay. Foreplay gets a womens juices flowing and the muscles in the vagina to loosen up so they are not being forced to open more than they are ready for which hurts. Don't feel pressured into having sex there is nothing wrong with waiting until you find a guy that you feel ready with and when you do and are both ready do research together on how to do it right so it is as enjoyable as possible.

    And a warning there are guys out there that will tell you everything you want to hear just to get in your pants and then dump you a like you are nothing and it will break you for a long time I have seen it happen. If a guy is unwilling to wait for you to be ready by constantly trying to push you they are not the guy for you they are just in it for the sex.

  • Yes, it is. Or rather - it can be. Sucks for your friends, of course. But they're young, most people don't start fully enjoying sex until they're around 30 or so. That's because it usually takes years of experience and practice to find out what you like, what works for you, what you dislike, and so on.

    "so if it is not because of love, why do people out of marridge enjoy sex that much?"
    - Because it's pleasurable.

    "Is it worth it even if you don't love the person?"
    - If you enjoy it, then obviously yes. Everyone's different in this regard though.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • If two people connect in bed, sex can be awesome amazing.
    I used to think all 'loud' females were faking it till I became that loud female.
    Sex isn't 'always" amazing but with the right person it sure can be.

    • Short and very clear! Looks like you have high experience don't you

    • @Steve-ram One good thing bout getting old... Experience 😉 lol

  • Not all that it's made out to be

  • It doesn’t hurt if it does there’s a problem unless it’s your first time. It is amazing and feelings for each other make it even more amazing and beautiful

  • Your friends clearly have been cursed with crappy lovers lol. Sex is better than damn near everything in terms of pleasure you can get from it. And when you know your partner is getting pleasure because of YOU, it makes it so much better.

  • It only hurts when you first have it and also hurts as they try to get their penis in and it’s usually when they put the tip in. Other then that, it actually feels good

    • It will get better for you with more experience.

    • Yep but if you do good foreplay i think you will not feel the penis tip hurting like that

  • lol, it's one of the best sensations your body will feel. Your buddies are lying to you or are doing it wrong.

  • Sex feels amazing. Pm me if you to chat about it more

  • yes omg it's so good. you just have to be with someone who you trust and trusts you and who you're able to communicate with. if they're some dingus or some guy who doesn't know anything it will be bad. but i'm bi so my experience is different

  • I advise just avoid it, it's a waste of time. Dont ever trust anyone and you'll never be disappointed.

  • The truth is, sex is like a drug. If used correctly, one can benefit from and even enjoy it; but if used incorrectly, the high lasts only a while, to be replaced by an even lower low!

  • Yes, it really is that amazing!

  • Sex has a higher rating than the Godfather Part II.

  • Not about love.. but feeling with it partner's needs not to ignore it to satisfy only yourself

  • I usually enjoy it.

  • In general if it is between two people that actually know what they are doing it can be extremely pleasurable, it's the individuals that don't know what they are doing that some are your friends are referring to.

  • Yes it is incredibly amazing. The key is to have the right partner who is into you and you are into them and you want to learn and explore each other. It’s just not about sex. It’s about giving each other nice foreplay. Nice massages. Nice masturbation and nice oral with each other. Knowing each other very well helps to make amazing sex. And being inside somebody you really like and connect with feels so amazing! It doesn’t have to always be intercourse either. Sex can be a good 69 and just each share in a nice oral session, or I can surprise and pull out a nice vibrator and use it real slow speed on her and kiss her and suck her nipples until she cums. Or I’ve had a tough day and I’m laying down and she takes a nice massage oil out and strokes me very nice and slow and kiss me and lay on my chest until she makes me cum. But it’s very loving and sex is more then just sticking it in and be boring and done in a a minute. Sex to me is exploring and taking our times!

  • It can be addictive.
    It can be awesome with the right person especially in love.
    It can also cause a lot of problems for people.
    In reality it's really not that much better than masturbation.
    Once I cum, I'm fine without sex for a while again.