Is this rape…. if?

[Anonymous]

So i texted this guy i know & asked him for some money,($100) & he said “yeah… if you give me some pussy lol” i respond & tell him “stop playing like that lol” & he said ok come get it. Come to find out… he wasn’t playing 😑 So when i met up with him , i got in his car to get the money & he told me to get in the back , i said why? He said just come on …so i did & he tried to pull my leggings down & i pulled them back up like hey what r u doing? He pulls them down again & started giving me oral, then penetrated me. I didn’t want to do it but i was afraid if i said no & got to irate he wouldn’t give me the money so i reluctantly just opened my legs and let him do it, but i know he could tell i didn’t want to and was not into it. I was at a bad place in my life at that time & needed the money but if i technically told him no In a text & he still proceeded to have sex with me isn’t that rape? Can i go to the cops? I feel so embarrassed and felt so disgusted of myself.

[Anonymous]

No it isn't rape and you let him have sex with you.

[Anonymous]

Rape is a word with several definitions, I would personally not use that word here, but call it non-consensual sex. It is anyway words against words, so going to the cops is tough, and getting it to court even more difficult I think. If anything I would tell the guy directly, that what he did was wrong. That you with actions said no and never consented, and how he made you feel. If he is genuinely decent maybe he will work on improving his interaction with girls in the future, but he could also just be into abusing and having power over someone, could seem like it with him wanting to pay for sex. But sounds like it is some time ago so maybe he changed for the better.
Anyway, I hope you will get well over it and not feel disgusted about yourself for other parts of life. This was just one incident, does not define who you are :)

[Asker]

Hey thanks 😊 just now seeing this comment.