Is this Sexual Harrassment sexual abuse what is this?

[Anonymous]

In high school, i liked this guy a lot. At one point he figured out I liked him and started sending me dick pics.

I liked him so I started sending them too but he was never satisfied. He wanted more and more. He would pretend I didn’t exist in school and made me feel awful. He would call me a lot of derogatory terms like his “arab” whore even though I’m not arab.

later I told him no I won’t send anything and he told me he would tell my parents we had sex (very conservative parents) I would send pics. Then was like no I’m not sending anymore tell my parents hopefully they beleive me. And then he was like I’ll come to ur house and kill you. I sent pics for a year and ended up blocking him and not talking to him at school.

What would you consider this to be? I feel weird because I liked him and consented to it at different times.

[OlderAndWiser]

I would consider this to be poor judgment in two days different aspects.

1. You should not send naked pictures to anyone because this is what can happen.

2. You continued sending pictures after he treated you poorly.

Have you learned a lesson from this experience?

[Asker]

I disagree with the first statement lol. If you trust a guy 100 percent then I think it’s fine to send naked pictures. I’m currently with my boyfriend of 4 years and always send him pictures and he sends some back. He never forces me to do anything or threatens when I say no. When I say no, he says ok. 2. Yeah It was hard because he was always there at school. I was on a sports team and he was the captain. I couldn’t really avoid him. He was also in my classes. Our friends were friends. And most importantly before all this I forgot to mention is that he was my friend. He wasn’t some random guy. He was nice sometimes. I’m saying all the bad stuff but there were good aspects of him. He was the funny guy but also super smart. I have learned to not trust people. And if someone makes threats like that, I’ll call the police in a heartbeat.

[OlderAndWiser]

"If you trust a guy 100 percent then I think it’s fine to send naked pictures.". You trusted the guy 100%, thought he was Mr. Wonderful, and sent him pictures. You say that you "have learned to not trust people.". So if you don't trust them, you don't send naked pictures. It sounds like you are just trying to defend yourself instead of admitting that you made a mistake (when it's quite obvious that you made a mistake) and that means it's more likely that you will repeat the mistake. If you need to do it again to learn a lesson, it's your right to do so. But you were very lucky this time if those pictures weren't publicly shared. Google naked selfie and see how many girls have their naked pictures on the internet. Do you think they posted their pictures online?

[Asker]

I know it was a dumb thing to do in high school because I didn’t trust me. I was scared he was going to kill me. Told me I can’t tell anyone else too or else he will come and kill me. I was dumb and shouldn’t have sent pictures to him since I don’t trust him, but I think it’s fine to send with people you trust. I trust my boyfriend. We’ve been together for 4 years

[OlderAndWiser]

Some people are trustworthy and some aren't. The untrustworthy ones can be very convincing.

[crmoore]

That is blackmail, threats, and racism. Not quite sure it could pass as sexual harassment, but I'm no lawyer.

[jadspop]

I would concidering that blackmail and very illegal... I don't know y you would like someone who did that to you...

The fact he blackmail you for pics is bad enough... But saying he's come over and kill you?

I would enediatly tell your parents... They may be upset you sent a pic... But they'll be happy you came to them for help. And I'm sure they will be more pissed at him then you.

That's seariouslly not okay...

[Asker]

Yeah I don't know that was like 4 years ago. I feel awkward and think it’d hurt my parents a lot if I told them. They would probably blame me too.

[jadspop]

Yeah... You'd probably get in a little trouble... But not as much of you had brought it up xD But it's all in the past now

[Nuespeed]

Sexual harrassment. It sounds like he is trying to harrass you for his own sexual gain

[abc3643]

You sent him dick pics?

Are you M2F?

[Asker]

No sorry for the misunderstanding lol. I sent him cleavage pictures initially. And then escalated :/

[Anno2]

That kinda escalated. Probably sexual harassment at first, when he threatened to kill you it's a different story.

[Asker]

Yeah high school me was so scared. I don’t know why I didn’t call the police or even tell anyone

[Asker]

Oh wait I remember. He told me not to tell anyone or he’d kill me too.

[Walrus_au]

Blackmail
and maybe child porn depending on the ages and laws in your location.

[Asker]

I was 17 and he was 18 I believe

[Walrus_au]

so maybe not the kiddy porn thing, but sounds like blackmail to me.

[coffeewithcream]

I'd chop him up in tiny pieces.
You can go to a school counsellor and say you feel uncomfortable, say what happened and he'd be expelled for sexual blackmail and racist language.
He needs to be dealt with or he won't stop.

[Asker]

Problem is this was like 4-5 years ago. I was so scared to tell anyone until after I graduated. He still goes to my college though

[coffeewithcream]

It still is a valid issue if it bothers you.

[Shamalien]

Violent coercion

[Tiger288]

Call police to teach him a hard lesson