Looses erection for cowgirl?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend seems to loose his erection whenever I try for cowgirl (the only position that gets me to orgasm). He doesn't seem to have this problem for missionary. Any idea's as to why? I'd like to try other positions eventually, but I'm kind of afraid to ask (since he has this problem occasionally) and I don't want to add more pressure on him to try to please me (maybe this is why?) Sometimes I try to be non verbally suggestive like when when were spooning for example (but it just does occur to him I guess). And though we spend a good amount of time on foreplay he seems eager to always be on top. Is missionary a favorite for a lot of guys? Are there many guys perhaps don't like cowgirl?

[Arrowdynamics]

First things first, you're going to have to say something to him. When you guys have sex I understand that you're trying to satisfy him and not put any pressure on him, but he has to know that you want to be satisfied as well. You can't be afraid to say something to him about your needs especially if you're taking care of his. As far as him loosing his erection it maybe that you're putting too much weight on his pelvic area and it's decreasing the blood circulation in his groin area. When you do the cowgirl position try to lean back __/_ or foward__\_ a little so you're not directly on his pelvis like this__l_. When you lean foward or backward you can put more pressure on your arm and off his body. You can also try reverse cowgirl. In reverse cowgirl the pressure will be off him and on your legs. In this position you can spread your legs so he can go deeper or bring them closer so he'll have a more shallow thrust which will be very pleasurable to him because you'll be riding the head of his penis. Either way you're still in control of your orgasm. I love reverse cowgirl because I'm a visual person and having a view of your girl's butt going up and down is an awesome view very stimulating.

[Dionysos]

A couple of possibilities:

1. You're grinding your shaving stubble into the sensitive skin around his genitals more than in other positions (Ignore this if you aren't shaved).

2. You're inserting his penis and grinding on it, probably taking a forward stroke and then a back stroke by sliding back and forth on his lap with it inside you. That gets you the rubbing on your clit that makes you cum, but it's way different for the guy compared to missionary where it's straight in and out thrusting.

3. He's used to controlling the speed of his stimulation and with someone else in charge he's getting frustrated.

My guess is one or a combination of these is behind what's going on. I've found that I can last almost forever in cowgirl, and it's actually really hard for me to finish that way. It's a great way to start off, and then when she gets tired I can take over. The stubble thing can be a significant detractor though from a pleasure standpoint. Wet stubble grinding on you while she pushes hard can actually start to give some serious whisker burn. If you shave, make sure you shave well before you get to grinding.

[Anonymous]

That's really odd maybe he feels a bit self-concious with you watching him...like looking down on him? lol idk

[soulmanUK]

From my experience, which is mostly with older women, they love the cowgirl position because it puts them in control of the situation and their own orgasms which I find a great turn on. Also in the cowgirl position I get a face full of lovely breasts which is also a great turn on.

However, if she as bouncing too high on my dick, to the point where I fear it may come out - which it does sometimes, and that is quite painful when she slams down onto the end of it - then I could lose hardness at the thought of it.

There are times when I'm so turned on with her doing cowgirl that she'll make me cum, and that turns her on a lot, but it doesn't happen often. Usually I would let her have her orgasms then flip her into a different position where I'm in control of my orgasm.

[WhiteSteve]

It probably has to do with him not controlling the rhythm of the action. Do you guys use condoms? That takes away enough sensitivity where I'd probably need to control my stroke just right. I used to mess with a girl back in college who always liked to start off on top, and we always used condoms, and there were a couple times where I came close to losing it. I managed to hold it together, haha, but we also only were a thing for like a month before school ended, we probably had sex like 20 times total. If there were more times it probably could have happened. Also, dudes just can have bad boner days too, haha. Some days it just doesn't seem to be at 100%, other days you practically have to tape it down, haha.

[Asker]

Im on birth control, so no we don't use condoms. I'd say his good days and bad days are like 50/50. Would you say some positions are just better? Could it be a timing thing? A mental thing? I mean obviously you're not him, but if you had to guess?

[WhiteSteve]

Yeah, I mean everyone has preferred positions. A lot of times its mental. I remember I just lost it one time with my old girlfriend, which was abnormal for me. There was like a month where it kept happening because I'd over think it. Instead of just doing my thing it was in the back of my mind and I'm just like "don't lose it, don't lose it..." and it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. Has it always been that way or is this a new thing? The big thing is to continue to not pressure him. That worsens it.

[kcjmo]

I have trouble in this position, especially with a condom on. I don't know why.

[mrbluesky]

Along with the other answers mentioned, it could also be a heart issue. It's harder for your heart to engorge the penis with blood when it's facing up. Sounds kind of dumb but it's truth. I always noticed as a kid that it was more difficult to masturbate lying on my back then in any other position due to higher difficulty maintaining erection. I know you're not that old but honestly Viagra might help.

[Anonymous]

You need to use some lube and go slow with this move, because unless he is stimulated by this position, he will lose his erection, so work together to form a perfect style to please you both, don't just assume that any position involving sex will please all, you need to work together to achieve this, good luck,x

[Anonymous]

maybe because its hard for him to be on bottom? also gravity makes harder for his blood to go rushing his penis. but I think his problem is because of his insecure feeling maybe. ask him, is he kinda afraid of having erections when you are on top? because woman on top makes man less able to move and his penis become less controlled by him. if you're not be careful, you might "bend" it when you are playing up and down.

[Anonymous]

A lot of it is mental, especially if he's nervous or thinking about something else. I had this problem with a girl I suspected was cheating on me. She was! She was acting a bit cold during sex.

So make sure you make him feel really good about himself. That helps a lot. Make sure he's relaxed and very comfortable. Don't rush getting on top of him. Play with his d*ck.

[Asker]

I do think he gets mentally hung up a lot, but I don't get why. We've been together about a year, I'm very affectionate, and I spend time fondling him etc, I don't rush...but when I take my time he usually takes over and we don't do the position at all. And even moving things in a brisker pace hasn't seemed to work either.