My boyfriend and I have been dating for 3months now. we have sex often but last night he just couldn’t get hard. Is he not attracted to me anymore?

[Anonymous]

Night before last night I wanted him to last long which he did. He lasted more than an hour. Last night tho, he initiated having sex and even though I was naked and he was fingering me he just couldn’t get hard. I sucked his dick and he still wouldn’t. I don't know I’m really concerned. Is he not sexually attracted to me anymore? This hasn’t happened before and i asked him if I don’t turn him on anymore, he denied and said you know I find you hot. I don't know why am I going soft though. I got furious and left his room but he apologised so I cuddled and slept next to him but he’s not texting me as often as before since morning and I am really confused. Is he just not into me anymore? Help a girl out please

[Andres77]

A guy’s dick is not controlled by the guy. Simple as that. He can make a supportive environment but the dick is going to do what it wants. He might be stressed about something at work or his family or finances or maybe he read a news article about something horrific happening somewhere in the world and he can’t stop thinking about it.

then you think everything is about you and storm off like a spoiled kid. I wouldn’t feel very supported and if this is what I’m going to have to deal with when something is going on in my life. then I might just not open up to someone that lacks empathy.

If you’re starting to have sex and your period just started but you didn’t realize it and when he saw a little blood and he got grossed out and called you dirty and told you to take a shower before coming back to bed…how would you feel?

not exactly the same but close enough. As a healthy couple you should be each other’s safe place. Where you feel completely at ease and no anxiety and no judgement, naked to each other in body, soul and spirit and completely without shame.

it happens to every guy eventually. Now he’s gotta worry about your reaction for the rest of the time yr together…which is just going to make things worse for him in the future.

[SnowedIn]

This is part of being a guy. It happens. There are so many factors that go into long before we approach their being any possibility that he's not turned on by you. Sex is about trust and communication as much (or more) as the physical parts. You have to trust him that he, as you said he said, thinks you're hot. If you've had sex "often" and the night before was "long" then this is something that happened. It may have sucked, but it does happen. You need to trust his hots for you. He needs to respect your concern. And you two need to talk to each other about it.

[summiter]

Sometimes a guy just can't get hard... and it probably has nothing to do with you. Had he been drinking or getting high? How old is he?

How has the sex been with him before this?

[abc3643]

These things happen. It has nothing to do with being attracted to you or not. The male (subconscious) mind can get occupied with other things even in the middle of getting it on and that will have an impact. Also, though, this may be the beginning of a health issue with ED coming around the pike. However, if he is about your age "(18-24)", he should be well enough to pop boners fairly regularly in which case it's just a sporadic mental thing.

Get him a bit buzzed so he lowers his inhibitions and he will definitely pop a woody.

[Summeroflove]

You only date for 3 months and are having sex is the problem

[Drumlin2001]

I imagine he's embarrassed and dosen't feel very supported by you due to your actions. Storming off would have adequate him feel awful. It has nothing g to do if he finds you attractive. He maybe stressed/tired, we're there any drink/drugs involved?

[Andres77]

Exactly this!

[FunkyMonkee]

Maybe he just needs a break. It CAN get kinda boring after a while doing it day after day or several times a day!

[BarryLiverstone]

Not a good sign. Did he message you yet?

[Philyouup]

one time? ans your worried. it’s paranoid.

[Luckycharms12]

Could be any number of reasons tired not in the mood stressed embarrassed it happened and gets in his own head so makes it harder to get hard.

[Anonymous]

Take a break from sex and it will change, sometimes too much makes it difficult for us to get hard right away, it’s not you , just how the male body works

[Anonymous]

I assume he was the one who asked you out

[Anonymous]

Happens to everyone and had nothing to do with attraction. Just try be supportive and make sure you don’t put pressure on him as there has been cases of ED linked to people having too much pressure on them to perform.