My boyfriend only enjoys blowjobs and handjobs. Sometimes he has trouble even getting hard to sex?

[questioner1991]

Is there anything I can do to make him enjoy sex more. Because he is so into blow jobs and hand jobs I feel like the sex is just not as good as it could be simply because if is not really his thing. He told me that he has always been like thaf but it still makes me feel a little sad when we are in the middle of sex and he gets soft. It kinna makes me feel like he is not attracted to me. Is that simply what it means or is there anything I can do so he will enjoy if more?

[cobrar97]

Hmmm... that's an interesting one. I didn't know a guy existed that would prefer anything over a pussy. BUT everyone is different and everyone likes different things. It's certainly NOT that he's not attracted to you. From your profile picture, you are an amazingly beautiful girl. If he wasn't attracted to you, he wouldn't like the BJ and HJ either... so stop thinking that. I'm sure there are certain things that make you wet and other things that don't... but that doesn't mean you aren't attracted to him, right? It's the same thing. What's going to be tough for you is that many women want their man to cum inside them; it just creates a "bond" that's a big part of the relationship. If he cannot do this naturally, you'll have that piece that's always missing in your mind. But that's all it is... in your mind; again, he IS attracted to you.
Is there anything other than BJ/HJ that get him excited that YOU can do? Does he like to watch you masturbate, use a vibe or dildo, etc, etc. Just wondering if he got excited by watching you (as most guys do), if he could get hard by watching and stoking himself a little. By the time you were ready to cum by what you were doing, maybe he would be too... then you could finish off together though usual sex and everything would work perfectly. Just a thought on something to try... as there should be many things that get him going other than BJs. But it needs to be fun and not meant to make him feel pressured, as that makes it worse. And you don't want to feel pressured either, because it will affect you too. There IS something that will make it happen... just need to find out what that is. After you find it, you can develop it. Before you know it, it will be normal, and he'll be filling you up all the time. And if it never works out, it's just his make-up. Doesn't mean you aren't rocking his world and vise-versa. Don't think too much about it, and DON'T let it keep you from your pleasure. Just my 0.02.

[questioner1991]

Thanks! I need to keep being patient with him. I never had this problem before so it is kinna hard for me to wrap my head around.

[cobrar97]

Just don't let anyone convince you there's something wrong with either him or you. IF there's something wrong, you'll know it, and you'll move on. But just by what you've presented... everything's good, and you guys simply aren't the "common"... but who wants to be common anyway?

[questioner1991]

Yea he told me that he has always been like that. The actual sex he does mostly for me and I do the other stuff for him. I guess there is just that desire forbid both to be able to enjoy it and get off at the same time. I do love him so I hope if I am patient we can find something that works for both of us.

[islands7]

That is the oddest things ever heard, since the vag feel is so superior to substitutes BJ/HJ... mmmmm
1. One guess would be that he has to exert himself doing vag and that distracts him, wears him out?
2. Is he a catered to only child spoiled momma's boy that never has to do for himself?
3. Out of shape?
4. Has gay tendencies or mild attractions to?
5. Has "ideal" female models that are not same as you? If this, then put your ego in the closet for an experiment that involved him looking at his ideals posted in view while having sex with you.
6. In what sex position does he seem to last longest?
7. Which body parts of yours turn him on most, get him hard? If any, get him to employ (play, touch, massage, etc.) these during sex.

[questioner1991]

He is in top physical shape and he told me that he has always been like that and just hand feels so much better to him. He isn't really lazy when we do have sex even though real sex is mostly for me. He did say that he used to have a p*rn addiction.

[islands7]

I've read your comments thus far to glean more clues - other than p*rn addiction - but you'll really have to try harder to put more clues out here to have any hope of a solution...

[vmw2008]

I've never personally encountered this before. Most guys are trying to convince me to move past the foreplay over to sex lol Maybe a guy would have better advice on this one, but it sounds like it's in his head. It's likely something you'll need to delicately discuss, but discuss it you should. If he's unwilling to work at it, you may be sexually incompatible. Not to mention in the long-term if you ever settled down together, having children would prove difficult to impossible.

[CuriousEddie]

Oh, he's gay, for sure.

I'm joking. That's the stupid answer some people give on GAG when sex isn't their definition of "norm".

As a few people have pointed out, at long as you're happy -- but I'm not sure that you are. You talk about him enjoying it more, but how is it for you. Frankly, does he get you off? Does he go down on you?

[bastuss]

try your luck on the morning , if he is also get "soft mode" there , i suggest u to look for more healthy other guy..

[AlwaysBelieving]

Me thinks he height be conditioned to masterbation.