My girlfriend ask me to take her forcefully, is she gone mad or pervert?

[Anonymous]

My girlfriend asked me to take her forcefully for sex if I want to sleep with her. She keeps me refusing for intercourse & she has only one condition either I take her by force or leave it. She says its dream fantasy!! Her bestie tried with her boyfriend & now she want to try with me!!! Her bestie is a complete bitch I don't like her & her boyfriend is a bartender a complete useless pervert dickhead And I am seriously not going in this rape related fantasy I work whole day & get back to my home exhausted I don't have time for her kinky ideas and in addition I'm not that kind of mad beast huge drunker guy I love her and in respect of that we can have a good sex like normal people have. I don't know what she is pointing towards. She had a fantasy earlier in the past that she wants to dominate me in the bed & I let her as it was Valentine's day. That night was so horrific. She handcuffed me & tried all type of fuckin experiments she gathered from the internet. Is she in a depression or something or any cause like why she is behaving like a bitch?

[Wonderer89]

She isn't mad or a pervert, but it's wrong that she's trying to force you to do something you're not comfortable with.
Acting out fantasy is completely normal but it needs to be clearly discussed and boundaries set by both parties.
If you're not into it that's completely fine, but she needs to respect that.
If this is something she doesn't want to be without then you may not be sexually compatible long term

[Asker]

Yeah & why should I force her it's called rape. I never did anything without her consent and never tried to make her uncomfortable. Will it really look good if I force her!!! How can a girl ever think of that! I'm not a rude guy by the way..

[Wonderer89]

It's not actual rape when she is asking for this; that's why it's important to discuss everything and be on the same page before it happens. She should have a safe word that when said everything stops. Rape fantasy and role play is not rape

[Asker]

What should I do? Do as she says?

[Wonderer89]

If you're not interested then you tell her you don't want to. I really don't understand why you're making such a big deal about this, she brought up a fantasy and is asking you to participate. Saying no is perfectly fine, just as she is free to do if you opened up to her about one of your own

[Asker]

No she will not listen me anyway and she refusing me from normal sex too!!

[Wonderer89]

Then it's not the relationship for you and you walk away, as I said in my very first comment

[Asker]

I tried to explain to her but she doesn't listens to me she cries like a kid. I won't let me go, actually she really loves me but everything in a relationship is always not perfect

[Wonderer89]

Dude you're over 30. If she can't be an adult, you certainly can.

[Asker]

No i'm not over 30 i'm 28 I have accidentally put my dates wrong and can't change now cuz i'm not using the app

[Anonymous]

She's not depressed or crazy! Everyone has different preferences when it comes to sex and there's nothing wrong with wanting to mix it up! I understand that this particular fantasy seems strange but it's not entirely unusual and being dominated can be really sexy! Of course you shouldn't do anything you don't feel comfortable doing but it sounds like she just wants to have a bit of fun!

[Asker]

How should I do it then?

[Opinion Owner]

Like I said if you don't want to then you don't have to, you have completely equal rights when it comes to the bedroom! If you're willing to give it a go for her sake then just start gradually, maybe just hold her a bit tighter or just be a tiny bit more tough. A lot of girls love being thrown around a bit, makes the guy seem strong and in control. Done right it can be a massive turn on.

[Asker]

Throw her around the bed means I have to pick her n throw her in the bed, right? And for your second opinion, I think will it be a right decision to hold her tight cause I'm literally too big for her i'm 188 lbs comparing to her she is 134lbs. Beside my own business, I'm a full time gym animal which is my hobby & I compete too so now you can feel the situation. This is one of the reason behind why she is pushing me into this but I never been dominant too her in bed by using my massive physique cause I didn't want to hurt her anyway or make her feel weak or trapped in the bed & even sometimes I let her to take charge in the bed. But she is always tried to convince me to be firm in bed & she wants to be my submissive, I always ignored. But now I think I should give it a try only for her but I don't know how to do these things so can you help in this & tell me more about on this, I seriously lack knowledge in this topic cuz I keep myself too busy. Thank you

[Opinion Owner]

Well that explains a lot! If you're a bit strong guy I'm sure she wants you to use it! When I say throw her around I don't mean completely literally. This is tricky to explain but say she was lying on her back you sort of pull her down the bed just a little bit further towards you (this is pre sex). Little things like that are really exciting. Or during sex say you're 'behind her' try pushing her back down a bit, or when getting into that position pull her towards you quite roughly. A little slap now and then doesn't hurt either. Just try little things like that, they'll excite her

[kiki54262]

By "taking her forcefully," I think she means that she wants to experience you being the person of dominance in bed. Rape fantasies, usually by women, mean they enjoy the man having dominance, or in your situation, most likely that she wants to try something new or exciting.

[Asker]

But i'm not actually habituated in these stuffs & how can I hurt her she is my girlfriend & why the girls have these kind of weird fantasiesies like forcefully, rape fantasies etc

[Poppykate]

I don't get these rape 'fantasies'. Rape is a nightmare! How horrible! Just tell her you won't do it. Every relationship needs boundaries. You have just found yours. It's healthy.

[Asker]

Yeah this answer is the best answer I ever got. I don't wanna rape any girl, I fuckin hate that. Sex is mutual thing so why should I get dominant I don't wanna hurt her or any girl. I am gonna clear it with her if she is gets it ok or she can find someone else. And i'm gonna find someone like you who doesn't get this fantasies. So what you think about this

[Poppykate]

I think that it's childish to want to do something sexually because 'her friends are doing it'. Sex is between a couple. How old is she? Most respectable adults don't go into detail about their sex lives with friends. You might go to a close friend for advice, but you certainly don't tell them what happens in the bedroom. I would be wanting to know how much they talk about sex between the two of you, and why she feels the need to try something her best friend and her partner did. I hate to sound like my parents, but.. 'if your girlfriend's best friend jumped of a bridge, would she do it to?' It sounds like you need to have a serious conversation, and set up some boundaries. Good luck.

[Asker]

She is 27. She wants to try cuz she was turned on hearing her friend not even thinking if she will enjoy the same or not. She acts like a dumb sometimes. I don't know you sound like your parents or not but you definetly sound like my mom. I can't go to a close friend for advice I don't have actually that kind of sensible friend, they will just turn into a gossip, so I don't have anyone for good advice

[Poppykate]

That's not good. You need one good sensible friend. They may be a little boring.. but they make you think before you do anything stupid. If a friend came to me to tell me they were going to a dangerous foreign country, or doing an extreme sport. I wouldn't stop them. But I would tell them to ensure that their life/health insurance is up to date, and make sure they take safety precautions before wishing them well.

[Asker]

Oh kay, so can I have you as my friend or a advicer. Yes I really want to share my things with one who can get me. I think your the right one, you can be my friend if you don't have enough of it & its just a genuine proposal to you & nothing else from a friend if you consider. Thank you

[Poppykate]

Sure I am happy to chat with you whenever I am on here.

[frozenhorizon]

Ugh I'm envious of you. But it sounds like you are just not sexually compatible. You should tell her what you told us, if the other good things about the relationship make up for it then I guess you just have to live with it and try to find something you both like. If it's too big of an issue then maybe the relationship isn't worth it.

[Asker]

Why are you envious with me?

[Asker]

And i'm sexually compatible what made you think that

[frozenhorizon]

The things that turn you on sound very different, that's why I said you're not that sexually compatible. And I'm envious because if I had a girlfriend say stuff like that I'd be all about it! lol

[Asker]

It is not like that the stuffs my girl is pointing too doesn't turn me on but she is little impractical. She is 134lbs comparing to me I'm 188lbs. Beside my own business, i'm a full time gym animal & I own a gym. Earlier I used to compete but nw I don't. Now you can understand i'm really really big for her in every angle, i fear that she doesn't gets hurt in anyway doing her kinky experiments. I love her & care for her. Earlier I fucked many girls including one of her friend & the result was like this they couldn't walk properly next day but they were not my love I treated them as my slut & they loved it. My girl is not like that, she is my love she is everything for me, I permanently settled with her how can I treat her like that. She is little childish like once she made her mind to be my submissive, I knew that she recently read about something on the internet like bdsm & all those & she wants to try with me, I ultimately convinced her that we can try it later & I mustarbated her th

[frozenhorizon]

Yeah I get what you're saying, I think it's kind of childish too actually.

[Asker]

She doesn't get this that the chicks in the porn are having sex professionally for years & they are getting paid. She just fantasize herself with them. So what now? Should I fulfill her wish & go with her or should I tell her to stop these things? What's your opinion, I mean what you would have done if you were in my place?

[frozenhorizon]

Well I would do it but she would need to have a safe word in case she actually wanted it to stop. That way you won't actually hurt her if she doesn't want it. And I would like doing that sometimes just for fun. If she wouldn't do that then I wouldn't do anything either, and if she wouldn't have sex with me otherwise it would be a problem for the relationship

[Asker]

Okey so I decided to do it. But referring to my past experiences with other women, the safe doesn't work actually, at least not in my case. Imagine if your there & your in the middle of the intercourse & your excited fully & your going harder & she in the middle of this tell you to stop, will you able to do that? your in cloud 9 & your gonna cum & your in out of control now tell me will that so called safe word work for you? Its really biological, you can't stop the chemicals secreting from our brain right

[frozenhorizon]

I dunno, I think I could stop myself but I'm an abnormally "on edge" person who isn't very emotional or driven by my bodily impulses.

[Asker]

I can't unfortunately & thats why I was confused whether I should do it ir not cause if i'm into that once, i'm unstoppable no one can stop me before I cum

[Anonymous]

It's just her kink. If it doesn't work for you, tell her that