My girlfriends parents caught us?

[Anonymous]

My girlfriend and I would often send dirty messages over the phone. Probably not anymore, cause her parents found them, and found out I was going to go to her house when they were gone to make out. I just received a text from her and she told me not to text back until later, so that's all I know. This sucks because now she is grounded and probably won't be allowed near me! And her parents are really nice and liked me before this all happened. Someone please give me advice on what to do.

[Anonymous]

Well I doubt there not going to let her see you, mainly BC saying that to a teenage girl won't help her not see you. While yes that is bad assuming she's an adult she should be allowed to do what she wants with her body. I would just give it a view days before texting to let everything claim down

[Asker]

Well actually I changed my age for this app. I'm 16 and she's 15 so we're still in high school. I think I will give it a few days.

[Opinion Owner]

Ahh yeah that's way more of a big deal, I would say delete all the pics you have and don't be sending nudes till your 18... wow am only 22 and a feeling old

[Asker]

They didn't see any nudes. We would just talk about the sexual stuff we wanted to do together and they saw that.

[Opinion Owner]

Oh... that's not as bad then, also not illegal? I don't know grey area, well it was just roleplay basically hmm I don't know, if it was me I would give her some condoms, BC I know teenagers will do what they will.

[Asker]

Well you seem much less strict than her parents lol, I appreciate you trying to help out

[Opinion Owner]

Well it would be more about safety than anything else, no worries dude even if her parents say you can't see each other it probably won't stop her... probably make her want to see you more

[Asker]

Yea I guess we could have a Romeo and Juliet thing going on 😅 seriously tho do you have any advice on how to approach and apologize to her parents?

[Opinion Owner]

Give it time for everyone to cool off, wait for her to message you then talk about everything her parents said. I keep saying give it time BC depending on her dad, he might want to rip your head off so yeah give a couple of days

[Asker]

The worst part is that her dad is a SUPER sweet dude and he and I got along well. It makes me feel bad for going behind his back like this. Next time I see her parents though, how do you suggest I communicate to them that I'm sorry?

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah definitely say sorry, but if they thought behind closed doors it was all sun shine and rainbows then god knows how they had a kid, I really don't think it's a big deal it's only texted but if you can't tell am very relaxed... hence why I have 15 grand kids

[Asker]

You sound like a very good grandparent, your grandkids are lucky. I appreciate your wisdom and perspective more than you could know, so thank you very much!

[Opinion Owner]

No worries mate, also you've only got 2 more years till no one can tell you who to sext with or not... other than the poilce

[Asker]

Hahaha yes just those guys 😂 I hope all will work out in the end

[jgokgotit]

You have probably lost their respect and need to earn it back. You know them better than we do so you decide how to do so.

[Asker]

That's so true it hurts. Thanks for being blunt tho cause I kinda needed that. Her birthday is coming up and if they let me go to her party I think I should give her a special gift.

[jgokgotit]

I also suggest going to the father, apologise for the texts, admit you were wrong and let him know you did not mean disrespect. It will not completely get you in their good graces, but it will get the path started.

[Asker]

That is what I was planning to do. It won't be fun but I think it'll show maturity.

[jgokgotit]

Exactly. Also, cut yourself some slack. Every teenager pushes boundaries. What you want to show is that, overall, you have respect for them and their daughter. Everyone messes up sometimes, even adults who have way more experience than you.

[Asker]

Thanks a ton man. Your comments helped me calm down a lot more than anyone else's. I'll take your advice and try my best!

[jgokgotit]

I did pretty much the exact same thing you did in my first relationship. One last piece of advice is that, if this is your first true love, things CAN work but typically do not so do not be devastated if things change. You are at the age where everything changes and people change. Guard your heart for when heartbreak happens, whether it be friends, family or love gone wrong.

[Asker]

I appreciate that but, despite this may sound naive, my girlfriend and I get along incredibly well and share a lot of important traits, like political views and just overall opinions. So I'm hoping things work out between me and her.

[jgokgotit]

I like the sound of that. The key is to be honest and genuine with her. I made 2 crucial mistakes in my first true love relationship. First, I was fighting all the time and refused to change. 2nd, I was not always fully honest, to myself. I never lied to her outright but because I was not sure who I was it was the same difference. Always be open and genuine. And always treat her with love and respect. Do those things and you will be ok. And no I don't think it is naive to believe you will go all the way. That is, after all, the end goal of a true relationship. Toughen up just enough to where the world does not hurt you, but do not become cruel like most in the world.

[Asker]

Thank you. For everything. I've taken everything you've said to heart and I'll do my best to live by it.

[jgokgotit]

Do you believe in Jesus? It is ok if you don't and I won't bash you for your opinion either way, but since I left the military and found God my life has been so much better. My advice does come from a Christian lens, but find a pastor and discuss stuff with them. I find it helps me when I'm struggling. Find a true christian male, not one who is judgmental and calls themselves christians. A true Christian is simply one who follows Christ. That also means not being judgmental.

[Asker]

I used to be Catholic but I did a lot of reconsidering a year ago so I don't really fall under any religion. I believe there may be a God, I just don't know how I'm supposed to tell which is the true one. I am trying to be an Eagle scout in boy scouts, and to do that I must speak with a priest. Maybe I'll bring some of this up with him.

[jgokgotit]

I do not fully agree with the Catholic ways, but the common faith is there. The only way you will truly know is to read the Bible, talk to pastors of different sects of the christian faith and walk your own path. Even priests/pastors are human and make mistakes. I found Jesus when I thought I was going to die in war.

[Asker]

I will continue to look into it and find myself. But until then I will strive to be as good of a man as I can. Not perfect, but good.

[kittycat119]

How old are you 2?

[Asker]

I'm in high school. I don't see why you're being rude.

[kittycat119]

Lmao how is asking your age rude?

[Asker]

Oh I thought you were asking if I was 2 😂 I'm sorry. I'm 16 and she's 15

[kittycat119]

The fact you find that ride is amazing and so stupid

[kittycat119]

Rude^

[Asker]

I don't find it rude. I misread the question.

[kittycat119]

No. I was asking how old both of you are

[Asker]

I understand now. I am 16 and she's 15. If you have advice I'd appreciate it

[Twalli]

We did the same thing minus ne going to her house or vice versa when the parents are gone. Her mom had issues with it, but since my bvb girlfriend told her we're having sex, she doesn't really care anymore

[Asker]

How old were you at the time? Cause I'm 16 and she's 15

[Twalli]

27 and 32. As well as 28 and 33. Mainly it's because she accepted it would happen whether or not she was in favor of it. If her parents realize you aren't trying to be duplicitous and what will happen will happen regardless they will probably be more accepting. Hoe long have you been dating?

[Asker]

We've only dated for a little over a month but we got physical somewhat quickly because we hit it off so well

[Twalli]

Maybe that is why they have an issue with it. My girlfriend and I didn't see each other naked until 5 months in, granted I was gone for 1/2 a month in that period (without reliable cell service). I fingered my girlfriend after 4 months and we had oral a bit before 6 months and had sex at 6 months. It was gradual which meant her parents knew me before I got physical with their daughter, although we were making out from the start.

[Asker]

All we planned to do was make out and possibly some fingering as well. And I did meet her parents before we did that.

[Twalli]

I met her parents before too. You have to see it from their perspective. Imagine if it was your daughter. I had an idea because of my sister and I was still living with my parents. It's really kind of terrifying for parents to contemplate their daughter going off with a guy who they don't know really well. Plus she is hiding things from them.

[Asker]

Hey man don't worry I get that. I Thanks for helping

[Twalli]

I just want you to understand why her parents are mad or freaking out.