Sexual Relationships
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My husband always has excuses for why he’s not there for me when I need him?

Literally every time I’m horny we don’t have sex. And there is always an excuse. Sometimes good ones sometimes stupid ones. Oh but if he wakes me up and wants sex it’s all good. Doesn’t matter if I was sleeping or whatever. No he doesn’t force me relax. And he never offers back rubs. He is like anxst on those! Even if I’m in the floor moaning and trying to soothe my back. What can I do? Walk up to him and slap him and say we’re having sex? 😡😡😡
0 1

AI Bot Choice

Superb Opinion

  • Noooo! Try not to take it personal. It might not have anything to do with how sexy you look. I went through this and it sucked and not easy to talk about. My issue began after I was promoted to a new position that involved stress. I already had anxiety and the added pressure was a bit much. My Dr. Put me on anti anxiety meds. It inturn caused me to gain a bunch of weight. So when I could be aroused or woke up Aroused I too wanted to do it and at some inconvenient times. The last thing you want to do is get frustrated. He can sense it and it challenges his masculinity. Pressure works against him trust me. You may see the fact that you are squirming on the bed breathing hard as you showing him how much you want him. He may see it as pressure like hurry up already get it together and get in me. Also the constant do you love me or accusations of anyone else or who were you thinking about that got you going because when You wanted it he didn't want to give it to you. Just take a deep breath relax you are beautiful you are sexy. What helped me was I decided to take a more natural approach to my anxiety. This included exercise diet no more drinking for me cut caffeine out. As I lost the weight and started to feel better about myself my libido came back. When it did it came back strong. It wouldn't have happened with out change, ton of communication and supportive spouse. Who did her best to make me feel like I was a man no matter how much less of one I felt. Good luck. Sorry for the long reply

    • Thanks. He really does need to lose weight for his health. I don’t care if he’s overweight but he seems tired a lot! I mentioned it a tad the other day and he has gone to the gym last 2 days. We shall see how it continues

    • One day at a time. Good Luck

Most Helpful Guy

  • It sounds like he only gets turned on by the convenience of you , he knows you love sex and you want it all the time so by him giving it to you it’s his way or no way , you will be in a frustrating relationship if you stick with someone like that , you are best to find someone that likes sex as much as you do so you don’t feel like a convenience anymore. Most men wish their wives or girlfriends were as sexual as they are , so your boyfriend likes the control over you and will fuck you at his convenience by waking you up when he is in the mood , that isn’t good he is a selfish person

Most Helpful Girls

  • I'd go see a sex therapist. They don't have sex with you or anything by the way!! They can help you sort this out. Because that's odd.

  • If you haven’t already you need to try and talk to him about this

    • I have. It just goes over his head or like I said he gives an excuse

    • Try putting on some sexy lingerie and do a strip tease and see if that gets him in the mood if it doesn’t you may have to ask yourself if you can continue living in a marriage like this

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What Girls & Guys Said

0 13

  • Welp time to do what he does back to him, I think that will teach him. Maybe he is a switch and was waiting for you to take control, I don't know the man.

    • When I don’t initiate we go over a week without sex

    • Well time to wake him up and say it's time lol

    • Or hell if that doesn't work you could always get yourself off in other ways.

    • Show All

  • Seems like it could be a one sided relationship. I'd sit down and talk him about the issue. But, I'd also be working on a exit plan. Simply because nothing could come from the talks or things change for awhile and revert to where they are now.

  • That sounds fantastic if respond to that 😇

    • Does he even realise what his got

  • He gets off on frustrating you. No kids? Get the hell out.

  • Speak to here explain what y have said here lol

  • Try talking to him again, but a bit more seriously. Let him know this is becoming a serious issue for you, and if he continues to make excuses like this, it's not going to be good for the marriage. Once and a while might be understandable if there's a good excuse, but constantly is leaving you very unsatisfied. Ask him if he cares at all about how you feel? If he says yes, then tell him he'd better change it.

    Because the subject is sex, I find people in general tend to not take it very seriously as it being a major issue, but it definitely is or can be one. He needs to take it seriously now. Bottom line, you aren't happy, what's he going to do about it?

  • He sound like a very selfish guy. I find that causing a woman pleasure is actually a turn on.

  • "Walk up to him and slap him and say we’re having sex? "
    This is the best solution that a girl can ever finde out. :)
    Go whit this one 100%, it can't fail.

  • It’s been my experience that when I initiate, the sex is so so.
    But when she does, it don’t get any better

  • Try sucking his dick

  • How long have you been in a relationship? The seven-year-itch (sometimes less) can be real.
    It's very sad when one partner falls out of love/loses libido. Mostly it's the women who does so, though there are a few cases of the reverse.
    I've had sex whenever I wanted it (often more than I wanted) for the first six years of our marriage). After that, have been on a starvation diet. All attempts to explain have been like water off a duck's back.

    • Been married 1 year known each other 3 years total

    • Hmmm. Boredom does set in. They say if you point in one coin into a piggy-bank for everytime you have sex in the first year, and remove a coin for each time in subsequent years, you probably wno't be able to remove all the coins in the piggybank! Sad but true. I've been through this. It can be very tragic when one of the partners suddenly loses interest in what seemed like a great, equally-interested relationship.

  • Girls get horny? 😊 it’s rare to find but if he is making excuses then something else is going on, maybe stress or tired , only thing you can do is communicate these things

  • Tell him that if he doesn't change the things they are you will leave him. Complaining here isn't going to solve anything, and as far as I see it doesn't really bother you either since the only thing you do about it is complaining. You have to take actions if you want to change this, because most man doesn't really care about your feelings. Why would he if he gets what he wants anyway.

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