My new boyfriend said he can't cum with condom on but is it true?

[Anonymous]

He says going bare feels better. I'm 18 so never heard this before but he's 21 and says he can't cum. So do I let him? I want him to like sex with me.

[Hedera]

If he is pressuring you into going unprotected then he is too immature for you and you should dump him. If he actually cared for you or understood the risks involved with unprotected sex he wouldn't pressure you. At the end of the day, YOU would be the one to end up pregnant, not him.

If you don't feel he is pressuring you, and you are considering going unprotected consider the following:
First, if you aren't his first partner he should be screened for STIs (you as well if he isn't yours).
Secondly, unless you want kids, you need to invest in some form of birth control (although you may still possibly get pregnant as none of the other protections are as good as a condom). Be aware that birth control can have some nasty side effects for women.
One other possibility, if he feels this is a major problem for him, is that maybe he could get a vasectomy. Vasectomies are actually reversible with a success rate of 90-95% within 10 years of getting it done (so your boyfriend would be in his 30s by this time). It would be advisable to freeze some sperm, just in case, if kids are on the cards some day. I'm not sure about the costs of this in the USA as I live in Australia, but a good way to tell if it would be worth it would be to compare the costs of that to the costs of the pill and possible abortion (or raising a kid, if abortion is not something you could/would do).

[Aerissa_Jade]

I've had guys say this and two hours later they still can't seem to go, but don't go bare no matter what. Unless your super serious about him and know he is clean and you are on some sort of BC.

He should still enjoy it, even if he can't go but one thing is if he is putting it on too tight (need to leave a little room at the end) then its harder for some men to go.

Either way, when your out of energy... and he really wants in, just lay him on his back and take it off and give him a great hand job (or oral if your into that, I'm not.)

[Lliam]

That is so sweet, anonymous.

If you're not on some form of birth control, you have no other recourse than a condom.
If you are on birth control, you don't need a condom.

I'll say that condoms definitely detract from the sexual experience. Neither of you can feel bare skin sliding against skin (nerve endings), and he can't feel your wetness. I liken the experience to petting a soft furry kitten while wearing surgical gloves.

There is also the awkwardness of having to put on a condom whenever you plan to have sex.

I hate condoms, myself. Every girlfriend I ever had was on the pill.

So I'd recommend that you explore birth control options. There are many to choose from. Unfortunately, his only other option is a vasectomy. I wouldn't risk the pull out method.

[TheorionMage]

BULLSHIT!!!
Yes, 'going bare' feels better BECAUSE Nature INTENDED copulation to FERTILIZE your eggs!
The 'feels good' orgasmic climax for males is merely an evolutionary aside 'motivator'
to have the muscles of his Testes (balls) spasm & contract.

He either spews into YOU or into a barrier condom to circumvent fertilizing your Ova!
Or into YOU orally or ANALLY... NEITHER of which give Sperm a pathway to YOUR egg!

And NEVER forget, those Sperm are ALIVE, ... swimming, and consciously DETERMINED.
They have ONE fanatical purpose in their brief lives... FIND YOUR Egg!!!

If HE don't wanna be 'Daddy' those Sperm MUST NOT complete THEIR SOLE MISSION, PERIOD!

[laurieluvsit]

First ask him if he wants a baby and then if you do no problem.

If it's a not, than you need to get on some sort of birth control. You can get it for free at some pregnancy clinics.

Also, he may want to try "Natural Lamb" condom make with lamb membrane and almost feels like nothing is on I am told.'

[chrissykerdock]

you may want to give him blowjobs and swallow his cum for awhile... the beauty of blowjobs is you get to have more intimacy with him and enjoy his penis without getting pregnant... i enjoy giving blowjobs more than having intercourse believe it or not.

[bowenw]

Agree.

[TheSpicyWench]

Oh hunny. Just dump him and save yourself the hassle. Any excuse not to wear a condomn is bullshit. I don't care what it is.

[Boromir]

Nonsense, he just wants to go bare and is a bloody egoistic assh*le. Dump him. Today. He’s not worth your energy, love and most of all not tears when he dumps you when you’re pregnant all of a sudden.

[Daniela1982]

Do you also want him to like getting you pregnant? Then a month later you will be here moaning "I got pregnant because my boyfriend wouldn't use a condom. What should I do?"

[wheresmrcunnunglis]

Pfft hell no its not true! Theyre just being a prick about having to wear one to get you to let them go raw in you which you should NOT do especially if they didn't show you a test sharing that they're STD free! Also a red flag with how they're lying. Let them go back to using their damn hand to "cum" if they dont want to wear a condom, you'll find another guy who will want you Im sure.

[purplepoppy]

He's full of bullshit and just wants to share his STD collection with you.

[UniquelyBasic]

I dont think its bullshit but she still shouldn't let him go bare.

[CindyRuns]

IMHO, he's full of crap !!!

And... in case you were asleep in sex ed class, unless you're using protection

Penis in Vagina = Baby Maybe !!!

[OlderAndWiser]

1. How long have you been dating? Are you dating exclusively?
2. Are you using any form of birth control?
3. Have he and you been tested for STDs?

[ChrisMaster69]

It’s a load of bollox.

he’s either lying or needs to see a doctor.

chances are he’s lying, which is really a shit way to start of a new relationship.

This is how he is so consider it going forward that he has no problem lying to you.

[ArrowheadSW]

He really needs to continue with the condom for pregnancy and STD prevention. If he can't cum after so long, you can masturbate together with him. I always use a condom and I had one girlfriend who, after having sex for so long, would tell me to withdraw and to cum on her as she rubbed herself. She thought that was erotic. But the condom was on at all times while penis in vagina.

[TrueConfection]

👍 That's double the protection!

[Sour-rose]

Yes, he can. He just bein' a little baby. Ain't my relationship but if he whining about not wanting to put on condom because ________, watch yo self.

[ObscuredBeyond]

Focus instead on what his intended life goals are. Make sure you're an essential part of it! Become the sort of teammate he'd be a fool to not put a ring on. Focus on your spiritual journey, and walk together. Sex will eventually become dull and mindless. If you lack that other foundation, becoming better at sex will only ruin you.

No committy, no kitty! Or you'll become a bitter cat lady. Men are cynical today, and feel a few minutes of play is worth sticking it in women who don't deserve it. And it hurts both in the long run.

[spartan55]

There are other methods of birth control which hopefully you are using.

[summiter]

Absolutely not. You are way too young to be a mommy or get an std. I have used condoms when I was single and hooking up and my orgasms were fantastic every time. Sure the sex feels a little better without one but the orgasm is always fantastic. Maybe get him close to cumming with a handjob first and when he is close put the condom on. Also have him try some different condoms to see what feels best. He can try them on when he masturbates. Just tell him no condom means no sex and he will have to stick with jerking off.

[dustybiker]

Of course bare feels better. lol

[Static_In_The_Attic]

Tell your new boyfriend condoms prevent minivans & child support.

[BrickBiggems]

This is the best answer.

[TheSpaceGnome]

lol, accurate.

[DonkeyDan]

Of he can't cum with a condom on then I suggest he goes to see a doctor, hundreds of millions of other guys around the globe don't have a problem with it. He's lying to you just so he can go bare. Yes it does feel better to go bare, but it doesn't mean you should just allow him to because he wants to, it is your body, and it is your choice.

[Mofunfour20]

We can't answer that. All I got from the question is that you dont trust what he says to you. Your relationship is gonna fail eventually. For you to ask us... Communication clearly isn't your love language