My response to users - Don't Define People By The # Of Sex Partner's They Have.

MY RESPONSE TO USERS - Don't Define People By The # Of Sex Partner's They Have.

The point of my previous take which can be seen here was to discuss those who are on both sides of the spectrum:

A) The person who has plenty of sex partners.

B) The person who has little or no sex partners.

I spent a equal amount of energy speaking about both sides, yet I noticed a majority of my comments pertained mostly to Person A.

My main point of the article was to express that it is okay to have your view on the decisions that someone chooses to make in their lives, but it is not okay to shame them.

I want you to understand that having a respectful opinion is very different than one that is judgmental and brings shame on another.

Lets look at a few examples of what I mean in reference to my topic of discussion,

Person 1 says, " Person A is free to live their life the way that they want. But I want someone who values sex the same way as me, so I would choose not to date that person."

Person 2 says, "Person A is free to live their life the way that they want. But this person is a huge slut and disgusting whore! Good luck finding someone to fill that huge grand canyon!"

Which opinion is better expressed and seems less judgmental? If you said Person # 1 then you are correct. I am usually against opinions like number 2.

The only time I can agree with opinions of judgment is if we are talking about a promiscuous person that is:

  • A cheater
  • A liar
  • A std spreader
  • Someone who uses sex has a way to cover up their underlying issues or a way to cope/escape from problems. (This person may or may not be a sex addict).

My perspective changes completely because this person isn't only affecting their life, they are also doing so to the people around them. Their behavior is selfish deserves words of backlash! I often find myself getting angered, because the extent of some peoples self absorption can be unbelievable at times. It's one thing to be a very sexual being but it's another to be one that does so with intent to inflict harm on others.

You can be a very sexually open person and be the most honest and trustworthy individual ever. Often times, when we hear that someone is this way we immediately group and place them with those who are dishonest and whose intentions are to inflict harm. But how do we know that the person isn't totally opposite of what our mind has programmed itself to believe? Perhaps, this person is in a polyamory relationship. Or maybe this person is in a open relationship where all partners consented to those acts. Or perhaps this person is single and enjoys variety (but can be faithful when in a committed relationship). Why should that be looked at has bad when the person is not misleading and is upfront with each and every person they encounter?

The person I have described, has done no wrong. The word "wrong" means to inflict harm. Yet many of us automatically place someone we hear that is sexually open, in the same category has someone who has negative intent. We proceed to define them by the words "whore" or "slut". Why is this person's whole character being summed up by one or two words based on the sexual acts they do in the privacy of their own bedroom? There's more to a person than the amount of sexual partners they have.

It's almost as if we devalue a person so much when we find out their very sexually open,

that nothing else about them even matters.

My response to users - Don't Define People By The # Of Sex Partner's They Have.

I'll take the cape! But, I am no Captain Save A Hoe.

In fact he has retired and is getting him some! :-0

I am just simply trying to state that peoples perceptions of "wrong" more so has to do with their religious/and or moral values rather than "wrong" itself. Someone can be very sexually open and honest, yet many will still shake their head. These peoples upfront actions are being perceived as incorrect based on ones perception of the word "wrong". How can a behavior be "wrong" when the person's actions does not hurt themselves or the people around them? If you can recall, wrong from this stand point means to inflict harm.

What I am not saying

  • Go out and date someone that is promiscuous .

As previously stated, you have every right to your opinion or preference. If you prefer someone who values sex the same way as you do, then by all means save your heart for the person that does.

  • All men are .....bleh bleh bleh

It's clear to see that I am a woman that wrote this article. But just because I am, do not automatically assume that every take I write is directed towards men. If I didn't make my take gender specific by mentioning a sex upon speaking, then you shouldn't either.

  • Go out and slut it up!

People have been very sexually open since pre-historic times. So whether I wrote this article on sex or not would have no influence over the entire population that in this day and age, still chooses to engage in such activities. I am simply trying to create an eye opener.

What does wrong really mean? And is it mostly perception based when it comes to the topic of sex?

Why should we define people by the amount of sex they have/or do not have when there is more to a person than their private acts?

My final message

Yes, most of my energy in this article was spent speaking about Person A ( many sex partners).

Most of my comments in my last take was directed towards people who choose that lifestyle for themselves. I found it interesting that most users chose to neglect Person B (little or no partners). This led me to visually see, which behavior creates the most anger, conflict and is the most disputed.

I have to say, that rarely do online comments reflect peoples views in real life. The internet seems to embrace those who have little or no experience with sex. But, you and I both know often times that isn't the truth in every day life.

Sure, there are those who are accepting.

But there are also those who shames others for not being like every one else. It makes holding out, rather challenging or makes it feel like a huge burden. "I just want to get rid of it!" I have heard some virgins say. Why do you think someone would possess such strong feelings? Isn't their virginity a sign of self respect and pride like pretty much all of internet says that it is? Trust me, if this very popular internet view was shared by many in real life those feelings would not be mentioned every so often.

Some people have peers that make them feel like less of a person, like a loser and inadequate because they lack experience. When someone is over legal age, and they still have little to no partners their internal feelings tend to grow more powerful.These people constantly dwell on what they have missed out on, and often look at where they want to be (that's usually the place where EVERYONE is).

It's never okay to judge or define someone based on such a small portion of their lives.

Whether they have plenty or little/none.

Can you have your opinions about it?

You most certainly can!

Is it okay to judge someone?

No, it is not!

I often say, the words that often get heard are those that lack aggression.

When someone speaks to me like I am a human-being, in a mature, non-condemning way, I really hear their message!

When they speak to me in a deragtory way, my defense mechanism goes up!

Their message becomes lost....

A battle has been created.

Don't let that warrior be you!

My response to users - Don't Define People By The # Of Sex Partner's They Have.

Whether you have a little or a lot,

you have the right to your own life!

Take it back and do not let others define you.

You know who you are!

Even if your decisions are those of regret every day starts a new page in

the book of life, lessons and learning.

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  • Don't forget about your target audience profile

    • I'm not clear on what you mean.

  • inteligent my take 👍👍👍