Sexual Relationships
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Open Marriage & Open Relationship

My husband and I have been married for 17 years. We have three beautiful children in their teen at the moment. Prior to knowing my husband, I have 9 to exs which I have slept with each one. My husband was my 10th and when I was still dating my husband I also dated two other guys at the same time. They were my 11th and 12th and yes I also slept with them. Out of all, I chose to marry my husband because he knows about my past and he loves me for who I am. Eight years into our marriage, my husband started to have health issues that affecting his sexual performance. He can no longer satisfied me in bed. We have discussed and he understood that I am not happy and not being satisfied. We have consulted with our doctor and have implemented their recommendations, but nothing seem to work. Ten years into our marriage, I cheated on my husband with other men some of them were my exes. My husband found out and again he forgave me. I love my husband and kids, and I want our family to be together, but I also want to be satisfied and happy something that my husband can no longer do for me. Now I want an open marriage/relationship for me to be satisfied and be happy. I still don’t know to approach my husband. Should I ask my husband for an open marriage/relationship?

Open Marriage/Open Relationship
Open Marriage/Open Relationship
2 8

Most Helpful Girls

  • thats a hella good husband. you are one frickin lucky woman. remember that there are more important things in life though than you being satisfied and sex. like, for example, your husbands health, and your kids. they seem like amazing people for being okay with all this. all you want though is sex. i mean imagine how your teenagers will feel when they find out that their 40 year old mom has to have sex with other men, cuz their dad can satisfy her.

    but its your life so do whatever, but PLEASE PUT YOUR HUSBANDS HEALTH FIRST!!!

    • I love sex more than anything.

    • more than your husband? and kids?

    • Yes more than them

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  • If he knows you and loves you for who you are, then he knows your love for cock will never go away it's probably one of the things he loves most about you. My hubby is the same he just hates when I treat him like a moron, because I feel so terrible about something I did that I won't admit it when we both know I'm full of shit. The second we start having sex tho it comes spilling out

Most Helpful Guys

  • You should ask him for a divorce and accept no alimony, no division of assets, no child support, and no child custody outside of supervised visitation. If you want to be a slut and get back on the cock carousel you can do so ALONE. Dragging your husband and kids into this sort of degenerate lifestyle makes you a piece of shit!

    • I don’t want a divorce. I just want an open marriage.

    • Meaning you still want your husband's protection and provisioning but still want to be able to fuck other dudes. I literally cannot think of any punishment that would be too cruel for for the likes of you.

    • I am already getting it behind closed door. I just want him to be opened to the idea.

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  • You can't be serious... You don't actually love your husband if you feel the need to have other men involved... I don't understand why women feel the need to attempt to defend their apparent need to cheat without taking any responsibility... Just get a fucking divorce

    • It is not cheating if he agrees to it.

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What Girls & Guys Said

6 31

  • I never intend to get married. Almost did at one point, but the person I was engaged to become more and more controlling and abusive towards me, so I called it off and went into hiding for a while.

    As far as open relationships go... that's the only way I fly. Monogamy is not for me.

  • I believe you need to discuss your feelings and desires with your husband transparently. Express your needs and concerns while also being open to hearing his feelings and reservations. There is no easy way out of this, and since you say you love husband, then this conversation should be approached sensitively and respectfully, acknowledging the potential for emotional pain or discomfort. Maybe it might be beneficial to involve a neutral third party, such as a marriage counselor or therapist, who can help facilitate this delicate conversation. Sometimes a professional can provide guidance and ensure that both of your perspectives are heard and addressed.

    If your husband is open to the idea, it's crucial to establish clear boundaries and rules that both of you are comfortable with. This can include discussions on who it's acceptable to see, how much you share about other relationships, and how to ensure that your family and primary relationship remains a priority. With that said, you need to also be prepared for all possible outcomes from this conversation, including your husband not agreeing to an open marriage. If this is the case, you'll need to consider other ways to address your needs that respect his boundaries and the commitments you've made to each other. Maybe he will be open to the idea of threesome (with another man) or even the idea of cuckhold. Question is will you be open to it? I would say have these alternatives open and ready in case he doesn't reciprocate for open marriage, he might be open for other alternatives.

    Personally, I would never be comfortable with us being in an open marriage but would be open to threesomes and more, if we came to that. With an ex, we tested our boundaries and found swinging and threesomes (with both sexes) to be pleasurable for both whilst still loving and caring for one another but neither were open to the idea of open relationship since we saw potential steps that could occur outside of our scope and could potentially ruin our relationship.

    In the end though, if you love cock as much as you do and he doesn't reciprocate to any alternatives, then you need to gently also be open to considering a divorce even though you don't want it. Nothing to threaten him with but be open to that move rather than ending cheating on him again.

  • So you want everything because you aren't willing to sacrifice, and you don't want to honor the promises you made when you got married. And you have him in a position where, once you ask for this, he will think that he either needs to agree to this or you will simply cheat on him, so. . . he will agree. But that doesn't mean that is what he wants.

    If you don't want to maintain your vows, why stay married? That's a rhetorical question. Your answer is a combination of

    1. "Because I 'love' him." Please! You have affection for him and he makes your life comfortable, but love is not just about what he does for you. Love is what you are willing to do for your partner. In this case. . . what you are willing to do is not enough.

    2. "I don't want to tear apart the family." Okay, but the only option is not for you to go fucking other guys. Eventually, you will fall in love with one of them, and then what? Or what happens when your children discover what you have been doing? You think they will never learn about it?

    You are one of those women who cause men to wonder why they should ever get married, because women won't honor their promises and they'll just use a guy, as you are now using your husband.

  • not an excuse, buy a dildo. you committed to marriage. period.

    • I have toys.

  • Interesting question... thanks for posting this.

    Let me summarize... you have physical needs that your husband isn't satisfying, yet you love him and want to keep your marriage for the sake of your kids. Your proposed solution is to have sex with other men, with your husband's approval.

    Your having sex with men you know (your exes) that your husband knows about will be tough on him. May I suggest a less stressful solution. Have occasional sex with a male escort selected by your husband. Other than that, masturbate with your husband present, with him helping out with toys and dirty talk.

    If things were reversed (wife doesn't satisfy husband), as happens in several marriages, the husband would frequent a prostitute, and that kind of situation has been going on for centuries.

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