Sexual Relationships
1 mo

Physical beauty matters, stop saying it's all about personality

Of course both matter and important, personality and beauty, even if personality is more important. Yet I hear some people who say it's all about what inside. Life sometimes is unfair, and beautiful people are treated differently, but it's part of the world.

Here I'll go shortly on why physical beauty does matter.

1) Approaching new women - the first thing we notice about the others are physical, and then we get to know them. I personally won't approach with intentions to someone I won't find physically attractive. The beauty is the first barrier, and then see if her personality matches or not. If it doesn't match, I'll also leave of couse.

2) Health - We often correlate health with beauty (with some extremes I'll mention later). Men are often attracted to curves (which help the delivery and health of the baby). Women are often attracted to broad shoulders, tall and build (which indicates athleticism, strength and sense of protection).

There are extremes of couse, like bodybuilding, fat acceptance and modelling industry that are often unhealthy. So of course I am not meaning to them.

3) Offsprings - do I really need to mention why we want to mate with the strongest and beautiful genes to pass our childs?

4) Sexual attraction - succeeding the approach, and moving to the next phase. People will have a hard time with someone they don't find sexually attractive (erectile dysfunction/not wet enough and even repulsiveness while doing it).

I see it more common in couples that are together for a long time, and that one side let him/her-self go, neglecting the appearance.

Alright, all in all, I'm not saying that everyone should find a 10, and someone who thinks he is less physically attractive is now doomed. Firstly, beauty is subjective, so someone will find you attractive. I personally don't like cosmetic surgeries and make up as something to enhance attractiveness, but I do suggest good hygiene and physical activity. Secondly, I said beauty is important, but it's not everything about social encounters and dating. Focus also on charisma, being productive, having hobbies and be an interesting and good person to be around.

Feel free to write, share your opinions and even criticize me, but please don't do it harshly.

Physical beauty matters, stop saying its all about personality
5 11

Most Helpful Guys

  • Looks do not matter as much as some would like to think it does.
    Sure, most people like a pretty face but after that you really need to like the person behind the face.
    They can be a horrible person inside, thinking that because they are pretty the world owes them everything.
    They can be demanding, narcissistic, self-centered, just a cold person, and not fun to be with.
    Nope, not for me.
    This can pertain to both men and women.
    I have seen some really hot women with just some average guy, but because he is such a great person inside that is why she is with them.
    Guys seem to be driven more by looks, women seem to be driven more by who that person really is, not just some pretty boy.
    It's kind of like a car.
    You can have one that looks great, the paint, everything about it looks perfect.
    Yet when you get in and drive it, it runs like crap, handles poorly, breaks down all the time, no performance what so ever, can't rely on it getting to where you want to go without breaking down, but it sure looks good sitting in the garage.
    Or it can have a few bumps and bruises on it, a little rust but it is fast, handles great, reliable, you can get in it and drive it cross country any time and like the energizer bunny it just keeps going.
    Those are the classic cars I have in my garage.
    Same with people, no trailer queens for me.

  • I will make the observation that sometimes you met the personality at the same time you meet the physical beauty and sometimes you meet the personality before you meet the physical beauty.

    For example you might see a girl make a flamboyant gesture and think ooh I like that and think she has largest breasts for her frame and they stick out quite nicely.

    You see I'm rather a sucker for female finger/hand gestures and I like girls who talk with their hands. Hell, I even like seeing girls tap away at their smart phone. It just makes sense to my primal sex circuits they will be able to do nice things to my penis if they possess that kinesethetic sense of touch.

    You might argue this is all physical but I would argue this is personality expressed through the girl's body. Some girls are very rigid in how they walk - especially during office hours. I would think she isn't going to be much fun. BUT a girl who has good posture and swings her arms around her hips allowing her body to move naturally... well I'll be thinking she will be good in bed.

    Aside from those caveats I agree with what you say.

Most Helpful Girls

  • Physical beauty predominantly matters to people who are vain, fickle & who'll statistically never have a legitimately meaningful or lasting relationship in their life.

    Why?

    Because when their partner "gets ugly" either do to age, disease, childhood, injury, etc. these "lovely (I'm been sarcastic)" people will drop their partner for "someone better".

    One merely has to look at the pathetic examples represented in celebrities who change their partners sooo sooo readily instead of being decent respectable human beings.

    • This is bullshit. Looks matter for many reasons. I get it, it sucks that some of us are not incredibly beautiful in a way that we would like to be….. but I myself find being attractive more than what it seems. Follow me for a minute. When a person is overweight it’s both ugly in a common way and also in a deeper way. When I see someone overweight I see a person who at least has decided to trade in the effort of staying in shape for something else in life. In my opinion, staying healthy and in shape (and I’m not talking about a gym rat) is super attractive. Not only does the girls body look great, I also know this person has priorities in place to the point that they have the time to work out and stay healthy. There can be “ugly” people who are in shape….. but it’s much more attractive than “ugly” people who are out of shape. I think it’s a hard pill to swallow for a lot of people when they think it’s not important to be beautiful realizing that they are full of shit. The entire animal kingdom tries its best and fights to the death for mating rights for beauty and good genes. Only humans are dumb enough to lie to themselves and pretend like beauty doesn’t matter. I completely and whole heartedly believe the world would be a better place if people would stop lying to themselves about this topic. No, you don’t have to look like a super model, but yea it’s important to stay healthy and respect yourself enough to keep in shape.

    • @Mybeachlife8888 Quiet twit

  • Physical beauty only matters if you let it matter. If you truly love a person's soul then nothing else would matter. That's the issues for so many people dating now a days. They're getting in relationships/marriages without loving their partners soul then question later why shit failed. It's sad tbh people are so much more then just their looks.

    • Soul is essential, of course. But will you want a guy whom his soul is good, but his looks aren't? I think it's needed to be attracted to both.

    • I wouldn't say any of the guys I dated were exactly "attractive". I was blinded by their soul/personality to much to even care about looks

    • @more_than_a_guy Physical beauty predominantly matters to people who are vain, fickle & who'll statistically never have a legitimately meaningful or lasting relationship in their life. Why? Because when their partner "gets ugly" either do to age, disease, childhood, injury, etc. these "lovely (I'm been sarcastic)" people will drop their partner for "someone better". One merely has to look at the pathetic examples represented in celebrities who change their partners sooo sooo readily instead of being decent respectable human beings.

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What Girls & Guys Said

20 45

  • Seriously, my taste in men was titled "horribly flawed in terms of attractiveness" by various of my friends. Ofc there are handsome guys (and by that, I mean men with long hair only) who make me turn my head, too. But to me, the guy just becomes attractive if I'm into his personality, basta. And if he has long hair? Get the wedding rings.

  • @more_than_a_guy If physical beauty matters than kindly explain why my cousin who was horrifically scarred in a housefire when she was 12 is happily married to Software Development Manager making $275,000 a year.

    He doesn't cheat. He isn't American & his cultural upbringing - which is European - means that he views cheaters/cheating as a filthy and disgusting act. Every single one of his family members have been faithful to their spouses for at a minimum 30 years.

    And she's not the only one. Plenty of people who have been horrifically scarred throughout their lives have kept their spouses, have had their love thrive.

    .

    If physical beauty matters than kindly explain many people who have scars, lose their hair to cancer or even breasts, etc. can stay married to faithful spouses.

    If physical beauty matters than kindly explain why there has been an ever increasing of people with "deformities" - such as dwarfism - are married to people who love them.

    .

    You're American, I assume, and have a very typical American attitude. It's why America is one of the most wasteful countries in the world. What when you slobber like dogs for the newest phone or car when there's little to no difference from last year's model.

    Instead of toughing things out you "replace" something. A poor show of morals & ethics

    • I'm certain your example is false and the others are fabrications to make your point. Regardless, people know the difference between genetics that matter and scars that don't much matter.

    • @DWornock Can you use google you uneducated twit? It happens all the time.

    • If physical beauty doesn't matter, then why are short men, as short as 5'6 or less, collectively reporting negative experiences with women an dating, to the point where they either give up on dating or take up an unhealthy habit? Why are people complaining about so many height questions on G@G, if there weren't so many short men unsatisfied with their results?

  • Honestly women tend to say they value quality like ambition, industrialism, friendliness, and kindness more than physical appearance but I could be lying about that. Sometimes I think physical Beauty is somewhat the same about their personality. In other words, Physical attractiveness describes the degree to which a person's physical features are considered aesthetically pleasing or beautiful. Personality traits are typically defined as descriptions of people in terms of their relatively stable patterns of behaviors, thoughts and emotions. Appearances also affect both the way people look at other people and the way we look at ourselves.

  • @more_than_a_guy - yes this is why victims of cancer, accidents, etc. are happily married and very often married for decades.

    Whereas people who marry for looks rarely make 5 years in their marriage.

    • Why does everything have to be so extreme here?

    • @Toohot2care I think it is about morality. I believe that people wish all people would be like Jesus. To become perfectly moral. And so the extreme must always be pointed out because people must control other people. That is why we have governments. It's why we have laws. It's why we shame eachother. It is why we have political parties, both with different perspectives on morality, both wish to enforce said morality "for the greater good." So people will ALWAYS make comparisons like this. People fear other people. I think it is written into our DNA to attempt. to enforce morality onto others. It is in your own best interest to force everyone else to never do you any harm.

    • @Hagatha Is that so?

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  • I know i won't order a sandwich that looks ugly
    i won't own a ugly dog
    almost everything is judged by apperance
    hell I do not even know a woman that wears a coat in the winter because they think it makes them look fat beauty absolutly matters and thats why ones oppinion of beauty differs from another plays a role its not until there is a typical stereotype for "beauty"that there problems it was hard to explain to my 6 year old why there was a fat barbie on the shelf but then again you have barbie the stereotypical attractive blonde imprinting on young girls and it does not stop there you have the magazines and well pretty much everything is it ok to be fat I don't think so is it ok to portray barbie as the attractive blonde and thats the way girls are suppose to be niether one seems healthy to me funny story we were on our way to the store and i had mentioned that when she started losing teeth that i would give her 5 bucks for each one she lost , can't remember why we were talking about that but when we got to the store sure enough she picked out a barbie i told he i did not have 10 bucks on me to buy her one and she was ok with that and so we get home and i was in the kitchen making dinner while she was watching tv she pulled both her front teeth out and walked into the kitchen handed them to me , the teeth were not lose she said she sat there and just wiggled them til they came out it took almost a year for the adult teeth to start growing in and so i payed up that is how bad she wanted that damn barbie and it was then that i knew i would never truly know what goes on in girls minds

  • I absolutely agree with you. I wish more people could understand that. But it's sad that we live in world where attractive people are privileged.

  • I agree, it does matter. The first thing we see is a face, it's never a personality. Luckily we all have a defined taste in what may attract us. What may be my taste, may not be another's. And as many others said, I don't want to have sex with someone I'm not visually attracted to as I like to real orgasms not fake ones.

    However, you still have to have more than just the looks. I could never be with someone that is drop dead gorgeous but also an egotistical bum hole. It would be a total turn off.

  • Yes both matter but because of some certain aspects it can make someone who's not fairly attractive become attractive. For example if someone has a good sense of humor. Wealth. Intelligence. Goals. Skills.

  • What I always say.

    "If you look beautiful, you are treated beautifully. If you look shitty, you get treated like shit."

    Unfortunately I fall into the latter category.

    I honestly wonder why people don't just execute all the ugly people like myself. Since you know, we want beautiful people based on appearance alone.

    Even if they're cruel.

  • it's hilarious when these personality advocates gaslight others into believing they were rejected within 3 seconds for their "bad personality"

    • Politically correct virtue signaling. That's all it is

  • The relative importance of physical appearance to other things varies with the person. I think very few people put it at 100% or 0%, but I imagine 90 and 10 are not uncommon

  • It doesn't matter to what degree physical attractiveness matters because A most of it can't be changed and B you could be a 10 and it would make no difference long term because the only thing that looks do for you is open the door, there is no heavy lifting going on there that's all about what is inside and that you not only can change but can't avoid changing, that is just what happens as you gain experience but you can certainly steer the ship, so do that.

  • Both are significant, but it's unreasonable and misguided to separate attraction as if beauty is irrelevant. Undeniably, beauty holds weight. Those perceived as beautiful often experience more advantages in life compared to those deemed conventionally less attractive.

  • Nah, some people just have shit taste, is all.

    So these art the sort of dimwits that would get a nutcase pregnant, or date a beautiful psycho. Then hold a piyy party and vigil when (s) he burns down the house with them in it.

  • i agree despite shallow and beauty fades, it is stil a deal breaker.

  • Yes. Nothing more to add.

  • Of course physical beauty is important. The initial attraction, thing we notice about someone, is their looks. Appreciating their personality comes later.

  • It is about beauty, character and sexual attractiveness.

  • Bro nailed it….. everyone needs to stop being so PC.

    yes obviously personality matters….. but looks are so important.

    STOP, Right now is where you’re twisting it. I’m not saying being a 10 is important. I’m not saying it’s more important. What I’m saying is that it’s important to be attractive.

    It’s the cold hard truth a lot of people lie to themselves about. I get how hard it is for certain people to accept. But looks definitely matter.

  • yes i agree you date someone you find attractive and interesting

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