Questions about BDSM?

I think I might interested in BDSM but I’m not sure yet. I want to find out more and learn more. I have a few questions for those who are part of the community if you guys don’t mind answering.

1) How did you become a part of the community?

2) Has it made any changes in your mood or day to day life?

3) Do your friends and family know about it?

4) What is your favourite part of it?

5) How do you stay safe?

6) How did you figure out if you were a Dom or sub?

If you’d like to add anything else then feel free.
0 1

Most Helpful Guys

  • 1) How did you become a part of the community?
    I was introduced by a gal I was dating. I knew I was a spanko but didn't know there was a scene to join.

    2) Has it made any changes in your mood or day to day life?
    It made huge difference in my day to day sex life. I learned that I was normal and that what I wanted to do wasn't that unusual. I found that the vanilla women I dated were easily brought over to "The Dark Side' when they found out they had a submissive masochist streak they'd not known about before.

    3) Do your friends and family know about it?
    Some of my friends. I never shared it with my family. My sex life is none of their business.

    4) What is your favourite part of it?
    Engaging in the things that really turn me on, things in the S&M sphere along with some bondage. Really enhanced my sex life to know what I was doing.

    5) How do you stay safe?
    I only have one sex partner at a time and insist that we get tested and agree to be exclusive. We also have safe words that I strictly respect. They never use them but they know and trust that I'll respect them.

    6) How did you figure out if you were a Dom or sub?
    It was a no brainer for me. I've wanted to spank girls since puberty.

    If you’d like to add anything else then feel free.
    Any questions. DM if you'd rather.

  • 1my girlfriend was interested in it so i gave it a go
    2nope, we keep it in the bedroom only
    3some friends do, family doesn't know anything about my sexual life lol
    4luckily neither me or she is into pain or something like that so i mostly enjoy domination and submissiveness or in other words control
    5we never did something so extreme that it would be considered dangerous for us but we did some uncomfortable and a bit painful things to we do have a safe word
    6im a switch i dont like being in control all the time but i dont like being controlled all the time either so we regulary switch tho i must say i prefer being submissive more as my girlfriend really dominates good

Most Helpful Girls

  • 1 - Experimentation, and the realization that my partner can’t break the rules if they can’t move.

    2 – No, not really.

    3- My sex life isn’t anyone’s business unless they are personally experiencing it.

    4- bringing my sub to the brink of ecstasy but denying them release over and over again until they start to break down.

    5- By properly communicating with my partners and only picking partners I trust.

    6- By default. I don’t submit to anyone.

    Remember that in proper BDSM the dom only has as much power as the sub allows them to have and no more. A lot of people (typically male doms) tend to forget that.

    • You’re a dom? What do you usually do to men?

  • 1. I enjoy a bit bdsm but I don't take it seriously enough to be part of the community. Those people tend to be into the extreme stuff.
    2. No not really, it's fun not therapy.
    3. Yes they do. Occasionally they'll join in.
    4 tend to use it mostly as foreplay
    5 be very selective about who you agree to do it with and set your limits before a session.
    6 I'm too nice to be a dom

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What Girls & Guys Said

1 4
  • You think you might be interested? How do you not know if you are interested in something? 😂

    • Because I don’t know enough about it yet.

  • 1) I just knew I was into it ever since I was young
    2) I felt kind of weird when I first engaged in it
    3) No they don’t
    4) favorite part is the basic stuff. To me they’re just the safe spanking and foot whipping
    5) have safe words (green, yellow, red)
    6) I tried both and I enjoy both

  • 1) I read something interesting in a book and ask to my girlfriend if we could try, we both loved it... Was 6years ago

    2) well personally yea but it really depends on what you are looking for

    3) some of them do, some other don't

    4) control and being able to provide help

    5) make a contract, start with a soft master\sub and don't forget ur safe word

    6) if it's not clear to you, maybe try both with a switch boy or girl xP

    If u want to discuss about it, you can pm me

    • Wanna discuss about it? I M quite experienced, and I pref soft BDSM

  • If you have any questions about BDSM send me a private message

  • Not a part of a community, it’s just a matter of taste. Went to a kinkster party once, wasn’t fun, just made me want to be with someone I actually liked.

    Doesn’t change my mood I think, it’s just what I like it’s not something I try at.

    I don’t bother telling anyone, it never comes up and I have no reason to talk about it unless there’s actually someone I want to explore things with.

    It’s freeing to be dominate. Of course the subs say the same thing about submissiveness. Also having multiple women in a relationship is also an attractive feature.

    Safe word. Slow escalation.

    Being interested in being dim came naturally, wasn’t something I had to figure out. It’s just like “oh, apparently I like that stuff” and that’s all.