Relationship & sex?

I’m in a relationship for two years now (28f) (29m) we’ve had ups & downs. But we’ve managed we’re currently very happy together. We live together & We help each other out a lot, financially and emotionally. It took a while to get here but we’re happy now. The thing is we aren’t as sexually active as we used to be. So I have to satisfy myself 3-4 times a week. (I have a very high sex drive) Sometimes I get really sad we aren’t intimate because I some how feel disconnected to him. I know that he satisfies his needs too. But I’m always available to him but it seems like he’s maybe not interested in doing it? I don’t want tell him directly cause it has happened in the past before and I don’t want to come off as needy. Cause I am a very loving & affectionate person. I also sometimes fantasize about leaving him for another guy that wants to have sex as much as I do and is all over me. But I don't know I feel bad when I think about these things, it’s the first time I’ve had these thoughts. Anybody got any tips or tricks to light up the spark? (I’ve tried lingerie already & it did work but just for a day) then it goes back to sex every 2 weeks. That just doesn’t cut it for me. 😅

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AI Bot Choice

Superb Opinion
  • We all have different sex drives. Maybe try telling him how much you love sex with him and would like it more often. Have you tried to mix things up like different positions, or even better try some outdoor sex. It will not get any better unless you say something. How much is he jerking off? Maybe try watching porn together a few times and see if that helps?

Most Helpful Guy

  • If he would rather watch pornography than be with you, maybe he got addicted to pornography?

    • So maybe discuss a psychological treatment with him. Or take a hike for few weeks without WiFi.

    • Yes actually he’s been addicted for several years now it’s a real problem. I guess I am to blame for this too because when I found out I shamed him for it and he grew so much angry and resentment towards me that’s a big part of why he stopped having sex. But for some time now I’ve learned to be more understanding of his problem. I’ve tried helping him, but he needs professional help. And honestly it just sucks for me because I love him too much to leave him.

    • Oh and for the wifi, well he does it at work on his phone on ONLYFANS. It was getting to a point where he losing money but he has gotten a bit better.

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What Girls & Guys Said

1 5
  • Find someone else to play with hun.

    • Like leave and find someone else? Or play with someone else cause he’s ignoring me?

    • @waldorf7 someone on the quiet when he ignores you.

    • Girlllll don’t give me ideas. Lol

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  • Clearly you're not happy together. You can't even communicate this to him.

  • Damn I know the feeling and it sucks trust me! My sex drive is so much higher than hers.

    • He actually has a high sex drive (so he claims) but he just rather do it alone while watching porn. (I’ve confronted him about it)

    • @waldorf7 damn that sucks! I’d rather have the real thing then jack off! Haha but that’s just me!

    • Hey! I think exactly the same! It just sucks cause I’m in this deep :(

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  • Maybe dress up sexy or be spontaneous guys like girls to do that too. Speaking for myself when being in long relationship when try to get lucky and she isn't I'm mood or tired get fed up of initiation

  • Wow I'm surprised.. have you tried spicing things up? Sex is a part of a healthy relationship.. have you talked to him about this?

    • He actually has a high sex drive (so he claims) but he just rather do it alone while watching porn. (I’ve confronted him about it)

    • Then he absolutely does not have a high sec drive... if he did he would be having sex with you all the. .. He actually has a low sex drive.

    • But how? If he wants to masturbate everyday? Isn’t that considering high sex drive?

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  • I don't think you're sexually compatible.