Sex Is Always My Choice: Why It's Stupid When Guys Brag or Call Women Sluts

[Anonymous]

I've seen a few guys on this site and even IRL do this. They'll say women are sluts. Or brag about doing things to women sexually. Some even say that they used women for sex, and turned her into their personal slut and other insults.

To all of them: Women are the ones who make the choice to do what they want sexually. You didn't make that choice for her. Even if she wanted to impress guys, or he was player who had flirting skillz and slept with lots of women...she still made the final choice to have sex.

To be submissive or to have rough sex. Or have female dominant sex. Or, even to wait to have sex. Or wait until she's in <3 or even married. Even if she changes her mind and has sex with you anyway, it was her choice.

She's the one being penetrated, and she allowed you to do whatever. She's the one who made the final decision. You can't impose anything on her, even if she asks you to be dominant or whatever because she gave you permission.

There isn't anything for any of you to brag about. You can't be better than her, and to try to pretend you are...it's just seriously ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Thank you! Finally someone said it! I waited until I was 20 to have sex, and I was called a prude. When I finally had sex, I became a "whore" or a "slut". Unfortunately not only guys talk this way about girls, but other girls do it all the time too!! The only way to stop it, is to not care anymore! You're calling me a slut for having sex? Well too bad, I'm gonna enjoy my night and have the best sex ever, while you keep judging me! ;)

[Scrambledagain]

Couldn't agree more. Women can choose their sex life. Many men can't because of that sexual power you speak of. That's why I love prostitutes. Because I know you have the right to deny me, so I can rather just pay and do it. I am the same person as you, I just got to pay and that puts me in some power to dictate what I want.

[lightbulb27]

I agree with you. Men need to respect the women as a human being, she should be in control of her space. Be honest with her of your intentions and your feelings.

A lot of people aren't, are not healthy internally (they try to manipulate, lie, or are confusing, or are wounded emotionally), and it creates problems. Be a good human being!

I created a poll to see if men value women who are very sexual vs those girls that are more reserved...

I don't agree about "you cannot impose anything on her". I think you have a high self worth and esteem and are in control. A lot of women are or can be manipulated or lack esteem, and they are vulnerable to men who are abusive or at least not crystal clear.

[myTake Owner]

That's what I meant too. Even if she was manipulated, like if it's bad self esteem or whatever... it was still her choice to have sex, not his.

[lightbulb27]

Men who abuse women and disrespect them are sick and need to be... developed into men. You can have sex and not disrespect her. But there is an element, and what I'm concerned about in general, that men (some subset) function on "respect". If we don't respect the woman and her choices, then she is eliminated from the "LTR" consideration. A woman that has had 300 guys inside of her... may result in a reaction in that man of "how do I respect her"... did she not respect herself? It may not actually be the sex, but how she carries herself and explains her viewpoint. But I think the "default" answer to me at least would be, is something wrong here? It may be she is just such a sexual woman, and that be fine. But It would cause a pause for some. I think some of what you are fighting against is "dominance" wired into the male... he wants to be in control. you are wanting your freedom over your self/sexuality. This seems a deep issue to me and a central one... I am of open mind to learn.

[myTake Owner]

Well, that's all what I meant too! No one can define what respect is, except for her. If he thinks she didn't respect herself, that's his issue. I have never met anyone who slept with even 100 people though. Male or female I would think they were really strange. No... what I also meant in the mini-article was that even if she enjoys you being dom, that doesn't mean that you have any control. She's allowing what happens, not the guy. I like being dominated myself, I don't have an issue. I like to also dominate too... but either or sexually is fine to me.

[lightbulb27]

Here's the mytake I had on this: www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2002110-are-more-sexually-active-women-more-or-less-attractive-as-ltr-mates

There may be conditioning in men that "deters" them from substantially active women. Not saying that is fair... Thinking back to my past... I remember girls at young age who were sexually active young and they seemed... off... moody, mean... not approachable to talk to. They seemed messed up. Some guys would trash talk about how they nailed them. Some would praise them and say how good it was and amazing! But my impression out of it was... what was wrong with those girls? Thus, some of the reason if I voted in my own poll, I'd say a virgin or not very experienced woman (selective). The one I viewed as very active... I wouldnt' say no to, just not preference. But maybe some guys would? I know... this seems unfair... it is scrambling my brains where you are coming from...

I tried to message you but could not.

[myTake Owner]

Why did you think there was something wrong with them? Almost everyone I know dates multiple people at the same time, like me! And the moody girls are who they are, lol But I think people want people who are similar to them. You said you're introverted and so you probably haven't slept with dozens of women. Of course you want a partner that's similar to you. For you, sex sounds like it's only for special people. It totally makes sense you'd feel that way. But like I said it's awesome you're open-minded. I followed you again! I must've clicked it off by accident but you can message now.

[lightbulb27]

I thought something wrong with them because of their behavior. I'm thinking Jr high (7+ grade to 10th primarily). Of course were all clueless at that age. I also saw a guy who was "taking girls virginity", got one gil pregnant (aborted) and she was impacted emotionally although Ididn't undersatnd it. Just experiences liek that. There are cases I see where people have sex and it isn't so impactful and even good, so I'm not 100% biased, just kinda raises the alarm. Yes, I was total introvert (quite wounded emotionally) as a kid, didn't know that til later in life it was screwing me. I got past that. Correct, I think we want people like us, although opposites attract as well. I think it is the "inner child" working to to be formed into an adult. I don't hold it against anyone as long as they are adults and accept the responsibilities for their choices and do so in an adult manner. I don't claim I understand how that works for you or them...

[lightbulb27]

I was just thinking there is a bit of possessiveness in "love"... I think? Is that missing in your clic? like when I find someone I really love, not saying sex although that is part of the equation, but I really care about them, it becomes a desire that it is only she and I. That "feels" good. Having to share her with someone else, even if it was good for her, that be hard. I've read obout people who do that and know it is going on, but I don't get how they do that. Definitely a level of detatchment I don't nkow. I dont' think I'm being needy, I want the best for the other person, but It would hurt to know they want someone else? To me this roots back to the nature of man not conditioning, so I don't get the "free love" thing going on in your world...

[myTake Owner]

Oh, yeah. A lot of people can be immature, like the guys I mentioned on here. You don't sound that way at all. I think if you want a partner with a low # and you also have a low 3, then it's like you said. It's just a preference.

[Bandit74]

Who is using who depends on the scenario. It isn’t this thing where its always the guy using the girl or always the girl using the guy. If they both have sex and are equally satisfied with whatever they got then it’s neither was used or they used each other (depending on how you look at it). Or whoever cared the least about the other person. However, judging from that article I posted it seems like a common occurrence where women don’t get as much satisfaction out of their hookups and it seems that feminists believe it is a frequent enough problem that it was worth making a report on. So it doesn’t seem like women necessarily get what they wanted out of hookups all too often. Also, after being on this site for almost 2 years, one of the more common questions I have seen girls ask is about how they developed feelings for this guy they are having sex with and how to get him to commit.

[Bandit74]

“She got a really hot guy to put in effort for her” I guess in all scenarios involving sex, guys typically put in more effort than the woman. But If he didn’t have to pay to take her on dates, give her months of his time, or make any sort of commitment and was still able to get her to willingly send nudes and or have sex then he didn’t really put in much effort. Or at least he put in considerably less than most other guys would have had to in order to get the same things. (why would you brag about girls not caring about you) I have never met a guy who could get frequent hookups and easy nudes who didn’t also have girls who wanted to commit to him. There are however countless guys who can get relationships but aren’t attractive or charming enough to be the type of guy a girl would have no strings attached sex with…

[Bandit74]

Like I said, guys brag because it’s harder to do and the standards are harder to meet. Most guys have an easier time finding girls who would agree to wait and be in a relationship than it is to find girls who will agree to send nudes, have sex on the first date or let you finish on her face. Guys who are able to consistently get girls to willingly do those things are dominant over the guys who can only get relationships. They brag to put the other guy down, to rub it in his face what his girlfriend was willing to do to him and how easily he convinced her to do it. I don’t see how the girl is dominant over the guy she hooked up with but even if she is, the submissive one is the boyfriend. The guys who hooked up with her are dominant over the boyfriend. And the girl is dominant over the boyfriend.

[Bandit74]

The boyfriend is the bitch. He is paying for dates (essentially paying for her to spend time with him), romancing her, and devoting potentially months of his life while waiting for something she willingly did with hotter guys on the first date. The boyfriend is the one who is REALLY submissive to her. Especially if he marries her. Most guys don’t want to wait months for sex and pay for all the dates knowing that the girl had sex with hotter guys on the first date. Most of the time the guy doesn’t know upfront, they usually find out after the fact. However even if a guy knows and tolerates that scenario (waiting for sex from a girl who chose to have it right away with hotter guys) Not many guys consider it an ideal scenario. If the boyfriend had a choice he would most likely would not choose that.

[Bandit74]

Fuck! Sorry about that.. I posted on the wrong opinion >.<

[myTake Owner]

If you see life that way that's a shame. Those romantic things are usually a 2 way street for most couples. It's not about waiting, it's about caring for the other person! And plenty of people F on the first date anyway. But even for the ones who don't, it doesn't matter. Romance and sex are separate and no one is a bitch. Anyway, let's agree to disagree. I don't believe most guys think like you. Guys who think the way you do, are usually either Fboys or players, and both of those get trashtalked by almost everyone irl. So bye.

[Bandit74]

Fair enough.

[myTake Owner]

Yep.

[Bandit74]

lol you just have to get the last word in 😅

[myTake Owner]

@Bandit74 I figured you wanted the last word LOL seriously though I think it's cool you agreed to be fair. Sorry for posting on your opinion light.

[SarahsSummer]

media2.giphy.com/media/riQw6Nc9i4sKc/200w.gif

[Berethor]

Even if it's your choice, it's still don't mean that some men can't manipulate to do that.

[myTake Owner]

I've argued about that a lot on this post. But I nvr asked the Q, about why guys seem to like the idea of manipulating or influencing so much? Why are you people like this?

[Berethor]

Personally I don't like to do it much, but guys who are using girl are in many cases manipulating them, otherwise it would be much harder for them to use girls, it's all that is to it.

[myTake Owner]

Sure they can. But she's still choosing to stay in the relationship with him and allows him to use her. Guys like that are evil but they can only hurt you if you interact with them.

[ClassicRocker]

The fact that it's always your choice is the reason guys brag about getting it in...
If guys could fuck whenever they wanted there'd be nothing to brag about lol.

[myTake Owner]

If I could fuck almost any guy I want... then why would guys brag?

[myTake Owner]

I meant why brag in the way of talking about me, like I did all the sexual stuff for him. Since I could do it with... not almost any guy realistically but way more than he could get? I don't see the logic of guys.

[ClassicRocker]

Greater difficulty=greater bragging rights. It's more difficult for men to get laid. It's a fairly simple concept.

[myTake Owner]

So? It's not her problem things can be difficult for guys. You're doing all of those sexual things for HER sake and pleasure. And even if you didn't care about her pleasure, she got you to pick her and go after her.

[ClassicRocker]

Yeah that's why women get to brag about all the hoops they can get men to jump through...

[myTake Owner]

Depends. Lots of people F really fast these days lol. But yeah chicks brag too, but guys can be way more insulting when they do it in my experience.

[ThisDudeHere]

Although I agree that calling women sluts is bad, I see no fault in guys bragging. It is considered a bigger achievement if a guy gets laid after all.

[LittleMissCuriousity]

Thank you!

[evenlift]

You're confusing rights with morality in general.

[SarahsSummer]

And how exactly are any woman's morals for you to judge?

[evenlift]

@SarahsSummer Because morality is objective, and because I do not engage in sexist discrimination.

[myTake Owner]

I'm not sure what you mean.

[evenlift]

What I mean is that, just because you have the right to do a particular act, that does not mean that that act is morally good. For example, regardless whether the law recognizes this fact or not, you have the right to drink fifty pints of beer a day, but that is not a morally good act.

[SarahsSummer]

Actually morality is subjective and unless you have a personal involvement, it's not open for your opinion.

[evenlift]

@SarahsSummer First, morality is objective. Second, if it were subjective, there would be no point in arguing with me.

[myTake Owner]

If you think morality is objective... what does that have to do with what I wrote? I'm saying women make their choices and men can't force them into anything. So what does that have to do with you or what you wrote?

[evenlift]

I was replying to @SarahsSummer.

[SarahsSummer]

By bringing morality into this you are essentially passing judgement on what a woman chooses to partake in. to which I say, it's not your place to judge. And again, morality is SUBJECTIVE. There is no common moral law that ALL people agree on. If objective moral codes existed like "murder is bad" than there would be no murderers. But there are murderers. The reason most societies outlaw murder is because it is for the logical salvation of the society. So until there is a law governing a women's choices in the bedroom, STFU with your "objective" BS.

[evenlift]

@SarahsSummer If morality is subjective, then it's not your place to judge me for judging. You don't know what 'objective' means. A fact is a fact, whether or not there is a consensus, whether or not even a single person believes it. Reality is reality.

[myTake Owner]

Then why didn't you reply to me?

[evenlift]

I did.

[SarahsSummer]

Never did I judge you. If I had, I'd judge you as a malignant self righteous fool. Of course that's just my subjective opinion. Yes. Fact is fact. But there are no facts surrounding a womans sexual choices. Only varying opinions. Some may consider premarital sex immoral others may not so in order for something to be "Objective" not only must there be consensus but an absolute agreement on the subject, to which there is not. Some women (or men) choose to have sex while many my choose not to. If you wish to spar with me, you'll need to gather a few more IQ points. Until then, stay in school.

[myTake Owner]

not my 2nd comment,. You just said you were talking to another girll but I asked a Q!

[SarahsSummer]

@evenlift Definition of objective; not influenced by personal feelings or opinions in considering and representing facts.

[evenlift]

@SarahsSummer You did judge me. Reality is independent of opinion. There are people who deny that two plus two equal four. There are people who deny evolution. That doesn't mean that two plus two don't equal four or that evolution doesn't happen. The faculty of reason is volitional. You are choosing not to exercise it, regardless of your intelligence or lack thereof.

[HeWhoPonders]

It's not that we're proud of "making the choice" cause, as you said, women DO have the final choice in most cases.

What we are proud of is that we influenced you to make that choice.

You seem to be operating from a perspective that says that if a woman wants to have sex, she's gonna have sex. But that is only YOUR perspective. Personally, I see something quite different.

In many cases, I see women who WANT to have sex, but won't actually make the choice to have sex due to personal beliefs or problems. And, yes, while many women such as yourself will simply have sex when you please without hesitation, there are women who need a bit of coaxing and seduction to make them realize that that's what they really want.

And that's why guys get proud of when they sleep with a woman. We knew it was her choice, but we still helped her to make that choice. And that is empowering.

[myTake Owner]

Influenced her how? If anything she influenced you to perform for her sake, when she's just a random girl you met. I don't see how that's empowering.

[HeWhoPonders]

"Influence her how?" I don't know. Wit, charm, humor, good body, intelligence, big dick, private limo, romanticism, good style, puppy? Whatever traits that affect a woman's impression of a guy is influencing her. "If anything she influenced you to perform for her sake, when she's just a random girl you met." Very true, whatever reason the guy approached a woman and attempted to make the move, he was influenced by her as well. But like I hinted at, the two parties influenced each other. "I don't see how that's empowering." Is it not empowering to you when you get the guy you want to have sex with you to put effort into you? Same thing with us.

[myTake Owner]

Yep, both people are in it together. So why should guys brag if it's mutual? Girls can brag too but not as severely as guys do with the word choices. Especially, why would guys brag when they're trying to impress her?

[HeWhoPonders]

"So why should guys brag if it's mutual?" Why should girls brag if it's mutual, cause I've heard a few girls brag before about this sort of thing. "Especially, why would guys brag when they're trying to impress her?" I can take that question to mean two different things, so pick the answer more applicable to what you're asking. a. Because he's trying to make himself seem more desirable by stating how many women wanted him. b. Because we impressed her. We did our job as men and so we feel accomplished.

[myTake Owner]

I agreed with you about both bragging. I meant in my OP and comment how guys can brag in really insulting ways, like they're better than the girls or made them do things sexually. On the other hand, I personally don't like the our job as men part. It's insulting to me because... I just want him to be my sexual partner, not him turning it into something else for his own reasons.

[HeWhoPonders]

I don't condone bragging about having sex with a girl as if he was the degrading master and she was his "bitch," so I agree there. As for us doing our jobs as men... that's what it is. Generally speaking, it is the woman's job to attract the man and it is the man's job to influence her decision to sleep with him or not whether it be by being funny or cocky or romantic or whatever.

[myTake Owner]

That's what I meant. She's also influencing the guy to impress her. I was mostly only talking about the insulting kind of bragging, but I think men bragging when women are the choosers is silly.

[HeWhoPonders]

Us men brag because we proved ourselves. We brag because we were chosen while lesser men were not.

[myTake Owner]

That's really silly then. You can't define another person.

[HeWhoPonders]

When I say 'lesser man' I mean it subjectively. That is, guys who would have been lesser men in YOUR eyes specifically.

[myTake Owner]

You mean they wouldn't be as hot? That could be true a lot of the time. But that's just superficial. A guy I had one night with wouldn't have any value to me unless I wanted a relationship with him. So even if you were more hot, that wouldn't mean I liked you more. So if you want to define it all that way, you'd be lesser than the guy I was dating.

[myTake Owner]

Your know what just dawned on me? All this lesser and bragging stuff... Aren't you basically saying that whether you're hot or not, you're practically begging for women to define you? Like this is all about men competing, so women can tell them their value to her. So geez why especially would guys brag about that?

[myTake Owner]

So that could be why some guys need to insult. Because they have to try to degrade her so she can't degrade or define them back. I never thought about it that way before.

[HeWhoPonders]

Could be. If I'm honest I don't know myself why a guy would insult and degrade a woman they had sex with. I only know why they brag. Plus begging is a strong word. It's not that they're begging women to define them. There's a difference between begging for something and competing for it. If you want an Olympic award, are you gonna beg for it? No, you're gonna prove yourself to be better than the other athletes and win it.

[myTake Owner]

Yeah. But why would guys not feel embarrassed about wanting women's approval so badly?

[HeWhoPonders]

A lot men don't want it badly, many do. Some say "if I get it, I get it, and if I don't, I don't" and then brag afterwards because, hey, it's an accomplishment. Whether a guy is really desperate or not has little affect on how much he brags. It's more how much publicity they want for it.

[myTake Owner]

I get it. thanks for explaining. I still think it's stupid guys see it as an accomplishment but it sounds like some just need to be competitive.

[HeWhoPonders]

No problem.

[Bandit74]

It's considered "using" if the girl ended up caring about him more than he cared about her. If neither of them cared then they used eachother. Another factor is that its harder for men to get sex so if a guy gets sex with no strings attached she gave him something she something she could have made him earn.

Lol nobody says the girl didn't choose. The fact she chose to is what makes it worth bragging about. That and the degree of difficulty. For guys its easier to find relationships than it is to find girls who want to fuck you no strings attached.

With bragging rights, they were able to get her to choose to have sex with them right away without being expected to wait, pay for dates, or make any sort of commitment or investment. Other guys might have to wait months and put in a lot more effort before the same girl chooses to allow them acces to her body.

So the guys who are able to consistently get women to agree to sex without having to put in efgort have bragging rights over the guys who can't. If Johnny can get Sally to choose to fuck him and let him finish on her face after only knowing her for a few hours without spending a dine on her while Billy has to spend 100s of dollars on dates and wait 3 months just to get her to choose to have missionary then Johnny has bragging rights over Billy.

Whoever gets sex with the least amount of commitment and investment will brag to the guys who had to work harder.

Same if she choose to do more wild things in bed with one guy. He would have bragging rights over the guy who couldn't get her to choose to be adventurous with.

[Bandit74]

Another thing is girls often have higher standards for the guys they have no strings attached sex with. So once again its more flattering, more impressive and more brag worthy to be the guy who gets girls to choose to have no strings attached sex with.

For example this girl said: "My one night stands were with HOT men; men that I would have considered out of my league... When it came to hooking up, my partners prerequisite were higher; at least superficially, than those I deemed necessary in a man I was dating. Seems weird to see that admission in type but quite frankly my criteria for a man I had a one night stand with were all superficially higher; looks, swag, attitude, dress, etc. When dating, the qualities in the men I sought dealt more with depth of character and intellect"
dirtyinpublic.com/.../

[myTake Owner]

Whoa, I think it's incredible guys can think this way. And then there's the fact that whoever she's dating should be doing romantic things for the sake of romance and not sex. Anyway, that pov is still stupid. Men like that are just toddlers and I'd laugh at them. But it also doesn't make logical sense. You're basically saying that you got her to sleep with you fast because you're the sexiest in her eyes? So let's say that's true. Wouldn't that make you her b! tch basically? You do everything she asks you to sexually and perform for her, and you get nothing back except a memory, and you're probably the one who did most of the work in bed too.

[Bandit74]

Its not 100% about sex but part of the motivation or incentive is that it will lead to sex. Guys generally don't get as much out of romance. Next time you're dating a guy, let him know youve had sex with other guys on the first date without them having to spend a dime on you. Most guys who have other options would lose interest. Women have the same mentality a lot of the time. Whenever a guy says he doesn't want to date a woman with a promiscuous past, the most common insult women jump to is "you're just jealous you can't get laid". It promotes the idea that not being able to get lots of sex is something to be ashamed of and that getting lots of sex is something to aspire to.

[Bandit74]

Well you'd laugh at them and they would be laughing at your boyfriend. I doubt they would care if you laugh they got exactly what they wanted. If they are the type of guy who can consistently find girls willing to send nudes and have sex right away, why would they be embarrassed. They can do what most guys can't. I do think the guys women choose to hookup with are often more attractive to women in a purely sexual sense. Those insults about promiscuous women having low standards are bullshit. They may have low standards in regards to how much effort the guy has to put in before she sleeps with them but as far as the attractiveness of the guy, women have HIGH standards for casual sex. Supposedly girls are less likely to orgasm and less likely receive oral during a hookup so I dont see how the guy is performing for her. If anything the guy is usually getting as much or more satisfaction out of the encounter

[Bandit74]

All he want from you in the first place was your body, sexual pleasure, and a memory so why would him getting exactly what he wanted be a negative thing?

Also here's the link about women getting less satisfaction from hookups...

www.alternet.org/.../orgasm-gap-real-reason-women-get-less-often-men-and-how-fix-it

[myTake Owner]

You made so many points. So to put it simply let's say you're right again. It's worst case scenario, and she had sex with a hot guy and didn't orgasm and he doesn't care about her just being a memory... So? She got what she wanted out of him too. She got a really hot guy to put in effort for her, and if she didn't ask for what she wanted pleasurewise then that's her own fault. I meant that you'd be just a memory in the sense that you're being used also. It's mutual using, not a competition with other guys.

[myTake Owner]

And let's say the hookup was hotter than her current boyfriend... so she used the hookup for attention or pleasure, and she's actually investing her time and life into her boyfriend because she actually needs him and cares about him. That's got nothing to do with guys competing or whatever. It's all her choice.

[myTake Owner]

So as a guy why would you brag about girls not caring about you and using you for sex? I agree with your first paragraph so... I don't see what point you're trying to make. You may get more attention than other guys, but the attention is from the girl using you. If anything I think the woman is the dominant one, not the guys either way.

[Oram52]

Seriosuly did you even read a word of what @Bandit74 wrote?

[myTake Owner]

@Oram52 we finished the convo accidentally on another opinion.

[Oram52]

cool

[Bandit74]

@Oram52 Yeah, I mistakenly posted my other responses under lightbulb27's opinion. 🙈

[Oram52]

And is every guy getting laid? It turns out more women sleep with fewer guys. Which means in comparison proportion of guys is smaller to proportion of women they sleep with, which is higher. This refelects on Tinder too.

Guys must have skill, attributes, looks, status, game. Yeah she chose him, BUT why him among many other guys who also hit on her? Why few guys sleep with more women. It is usually divided as Lover type and Provider type.

The reason guys are admired because other guys know the level of skill required to be successful with so many different girls, a player MUST have game. All girls gotta do is drink beers, pick the guy she wants to fuck and drop her panties. What exactly was so difficult about that?

She chose the guy but why him? Why did she choose that guy among 5 others who hit on her? Its that being chosen is exactly the reason he is stud. He had game even if it was her choice to let him fuck her. Can guys go to a bar, have girls over them, choose one and drop their undies? These dynamics dictate who is stud and slut NOT just her choice.

I agree with you still, why degrade someone you were intimite with. I don't get that mentality. But that says more about your chocie too.

[myTake Owner]

So guys brag because they have skillz. The other guys on here said that too. But why brag about a girl using u and having to impress her?

[Oram52]

Again didn't you read Bandits comments or mine above. Can guys go to a bar, have girls all over them, get free beers, pick a girl, and drop his undies? Are all guys getting laid or successful with girls? What distinguished guys who are good at getting laid? Here's the thing they don't care, girls didn't use him. She lietrally put no effort in except choose the guy she wants to fuck and drop her panties. She has no bragging rights. Guy who got to fuck her who put in all the effort gets to brag, because she chose him over other guys.

[myTake Owner]

Yes, I get both your points. But you're right that I'm not getting why guys would brag. What you're both saying is that guys brag, because they got a hot girl to sleep with them and the other guys couldn't. So that makes you the most desirable guys. What I'm saying is, you're desirable because you're doing your best to impress girls. So why would you brag about being a girl's bitch basically? I wasn't expecting guys to say anything like that in the replies at all. It's a whole new pov on bragging for me.

[Oram52]

"why would you brag about being a girl's bitch basically?" >>> They're not. They're not bragging about being a girl's bitch and they're not her bitch. Again she did what apart from dropping her panties? You really don't seem to be grasping what guys are saying or you don't want to.

[Oram52]

Focus on the part why are guys called studs, yet girls sluts (even by other girls). In this context in what way does it look like guys are that girl's bitch. As I said in my comment above, "Can guys go to a bar, have girls over them, choose one and drop their undies? These dynamics dictate who is stud and slut NOT just her choice."

[myTake Owner]

It depends on how you look at it. It can be true. Guys throw themselves at really hot girls and other girls get jealous. But if he's doing all the work and effort for her sake, then that means he's her bitch. I'm not trying to misunderstand I'm serious.

[myTake Owner]

And what's slutty about being picky, since you and bandit said girls tend to sleep with the hotter guys? If you sleep with her then you're just as slutty as she is anyway. But I don't think that's slutty... because guys are the ones who fight the hardest. If anyone's a slut it's the guy.

[Oram52]

You're not understanding because you don't want to. You want answer shaped to what you desire, validation, why promiscuous girls should not be called sluts. Being stright to the point.. he earned that pussy. Why would he be her bitch? He got what he wanted.. pussy. Him having to put him that effort to earn that pussy is exactly what makes him a stud and not a slut. Girls are picky because they hold the cards, they choose, they pick, the decide. They had to put in NO effort. They simply decided. Guys fight the hardest EXACTLY, hence how they earned being called a stud. Girl stands back and drops her panties. Every time she fucks another guy easier she is. What effort did it take for her to drop her panties? In return like you mention guys fight the hardest. SO if a guy had to fight through many guys to sleep with many different girls, then he MUST have game. Hence why he is admired. Dropping your panties gets no admiration. She is just easy hence slut.

[myTake Owner]

I'm not denying anything because no one calls girls sluts anymore. Most people have sex fast whether it's a hookup or relationship. I think you guys honestly don't want to admit that you don't deserve admiration. You just pretend like you do because it sounds way better. The one putting all the effort in isn't the dom.

[myTake Owner]

I meant, isn't the dom in terms of girls. He could be the most dom compared to other guys I guess. But he's doing the work so he can't define the girl as anything.

[Oram52]

Girls are not called sluts, since when? Even girls call other girls sluts. Guys don't deserve admiration, should we just keep repeating ourselves? I'll ASK again. WHat is the great contribution girls make towards getting laid? Why is it that we should admire you for dropping your panties? Do tell us. Its obvious you know what we mean, but let me make another attempt. Pussy is a precious commodity. Its in demand A LOT. Guys just get pussy. Guys eaither pay for it, which is considered of low value. For high quality they must earn it. Now in reverse. How much value do you think dick has? Are dicks precious commodity? You could go to a bar, dressed like you mean business and get some dick, no problem. So how much effort did it take you to find some dick? The ease you can find a dick, do you think guys can find pussy with same ease? Pussy and dicks have same value?

[Oram52]

Think about it for a second. If dicks had same value, if it was as hard to get laid for girls as it is for guys. Do you think other girls wouldn't be giving you high fives, calling you a stud. Instead what do many other girls call promiscuous girls? SLUTS!! We do deserve admiration because we EARNED that pussy. It isn't just lying around, it has value. It is precious commodity. If it was easy to get pussy every guy be getting just like girls have no problem getting dicks. The very fact guys can't dress up go to a bar and find pussy with ease, makes guys stud. It absolutely deserves admiration or all guys be getting laid. Its a fact you ahve no problem getting dicks, yet guys must work for pussy. These parameters determine who is a stud and who is a slut. Like I said I don't see other girls admiring other girls for getting laid. Ain't hard to find dicks. Yet you also replied to same comment where he mentioned 2 girls happily getting gangbanged buy 12+ guys.

[Oram52]

Just remembered something and wanted to make this clear. I personally don't call girls sluts. I used the term to shed light on stud vs slut dynamics. I use the word promiscuous. Wanted to make it clear so there are no hard feelings. I don't give a shit what she does or how many guys she has sex with, she can fuck 100 guys if she wants to, none of my god damn business. What I definitely do care about is her being honest with her count no. And I definitely will not date someone who is/was promiscuous.

[myTake Owner]

Yeah I replied. Because I said girls usually initiate sex way more than people think. But let's agree to disagree on the rest. Girls brag with each other too, just not as nastily as guys can by the way. I never imagined in a million years, that me posting this would get comments from guys saying they idolize vaginas and girls so much they base their own worth on them. It's no wonder those same guys can insult girls. It's not personal. It's just how you see the world and your own selves. So you may have to insult girls because if you don't then you'd have to admit how much power women can have lol I don't even agree with hookups, but I didn't know some guys thought this way. You need to define her, because you let her define you so much. But that's not her problem.

[ConsultantIsBack]

Great take

[myTake Owner]

Thanks dude. You're the only guy who agreed.

[slimstiffy]

Its just an ego thing. Mostly..
Dont take it too serious

[00Lelouchxx]

Girls call other girls more sluts then guys.
If u sleep around then to us your a slut.

The reason why guys can't be slut or aren't told that's bad becuade one getting pussy is hard so if we get it a pat on the back. if u do it u already have the pussy why are u giving it to e eryone one for free.

You lost your value to US key word.

Girls slut shame for competive and jealous reason.

I fuck slht so I really don't care I don't like prude girls with agendas.

So ur a slut to us. To your self your probably not a slut but to most men yeah u are

[myTake Owner]

Yep girls can slut shame. But if you see a girl as a slut, and you sleep with her that makes you the same as her. If you have to put in more effort to get sex that's your own issue. But to not even take responsibility for having sex and just insulting her is ridiculous. I don't believe most guys think this way, but the ones that do are just insulting themselves really.

[myTake Owner]

Like... she HAS to be a slut after you have sex. Because otherwise you'd have to admit you tried so hard to F someone who might not have even cared about you later. She just went off and had sex with other guys, even though you did everything you could to F her. And she didn't put effort in at all for you...

[Panay]

This applies to both guys and girls tho... And it's not an issue just girls face

[Byakuyarko]

A slut is basically people, men and women who'd have sex with a cactus if it called them beautiful... While they are desperate people, it's not the nicest thing in the world to say to a person even if it's true.

[myTake Owner]

I agree if anyone says that it applies to both men and women.

[Melcart23]

So you want to have it both ways: you want to make it difficult for a guy to get laid, but at the same time when he DOES finally score and get laid, you want him to just stfu and not say a word or be happy. Lol. Women...

[myTake Owner]

No. I haven't had hookups but I don't mind getting sexual fast in a relationship at all.

[Melcart23]

I don't hook up either. I only have sex when I'm in a relationship, and in my 23 years, I've only been in 1. But still, women can't have it both ways. You guys already have enough double standards going your way, now you want to play both sides against the middle.

[myTake Owner]

Women kind of run the world lol

[Melcart23]

Only thing women run is their mouths

[myTake Owner]

Which in all seriousness runs the world. But if you're about to insult then watch it. I will insult back and then our comments will have to be all dramatic and removed...

[Melcart23]

I'm not even mad rn. Just messing with you. I love women

[Melcart23]

You beautiful, confusing creatures

[myTake Owner]

Cool. I just had to argue so much on this it's hard not to be expect it. The guys are just Hellbent on their points!

[Melcart23]

I mean if you feel the need to attack men, fire away. Lol. I'm not gunna be offended. But like I said, it's nothing personal. Women are women, and men are men.

[myTake Owner]

No, I don't think I attacked anyone. I'm saying guys shouldn't attack women.

[Melcart23]

I think nobody should attack anybody. I don't think it's just a women's thing.

[myTake Owner]

Yep that's true. Women can brag too. But guy's insults just seem more severe.

[Melcart23]

True. Great talking to you by the way!👍🏽

[myTake Owner]

♡yes

[Anonymous]

Allowed? Permission? Maybe guys would respect you more if you didn't view yourself so far above them. Get the hell over yourself. Sex is not some gift you're granting men. Why should they respect you if you think you're doing them a favor? That itself is disrespecting them. Sex should be a mutual act between two people. Not one blessing the other with sex.

[myTake Owner]

That's not what I meant. Women are the ones receiving the penetration. Whether it's a hookup or fucking a guy who waited months, the final decision to have sex was hers. I meant it in a biological way.

[Anonymous]

Well I expect that's mostly true. I have generally found sex is my choice, so to speak, because the woman obviously wants it and I get to decide whether to give it or not.

So the 'choice' to the extent it resides more in one party or the other is with the one who makes the final decision on whether it's going to happen. Usually I'd expect this is the woman but often, as in my case, it's the man.

[myTake Owner]

I agree but sexual rejection is usually done by women. I haven't met a guy who ever said no to sex.

[Opinion Owner]

I've done it lots. Usually it's more subtle than "do you want sex? ", "no" (though that has happened) but it's completely obvious what's happening when a woman suggests you could just sleep over or throws a leg over yours and grabs your crotch (had that happen twice). It's a bit more than flirting when every time you are near a girl she bends over and slyly looks at you over her rump or literally sticks her tits in your face, etc & etc.

[myTake Owner]

Hat actually sounds really interesting. Why'd you turn them down? Or how did they react?

[Opinion Owner]

Usually because I already had a girlfriend, sometimes because I'd seen hints of personality traits I didn't like, occasionally because I just didn't know them at all and wasn't so thirsty as to go to bed with a total stranger. Reactions varied greatly, some were obviously frustrated or angry, some shrugged it off, some were sad, all the different ways different kinds of people deal with disappointment. The surprising thing was how few seemed to have a sour grapes reaction, I'd have expected more of that.

[myTake Owner]

Do you regret saying no sometimes? I have honestly.

[myTake Owner]

Oh, have you ever said no to friends?

[Opinion Owner]

Not exactly regret because there was always a reason. It would be nice to live in a world were you can do as you please all the time without consequences but that's not the way it is. Not friends because I've never been friends with a woman unless there was some impediment to keep us from becoming romantically involved, age difference or being married & etc. If there wasn't something to stop them they would show romantic interest before we got to know each other well enough to be friends. Most of my girlfriends were the friends, acquaintances, coworkers or relatives of previous girlfriends.

[myTake Owner]

Oh wow, it sounds like you have excellent boundaries. I'm sure there's no drama for U!

[Opinion Owner]

There was always an interval commensurate with the degree of association and I never initiated anything. I never went directly from a girlfriend to one of her friends but they would 'somehow happen' to come across me (none of my doing) months later. I never had any drama from that.