Should end my friends with benefits since I'm catching feelings?

[Anonymous]

Okay so I've been in a no strings attached fling with my friend of 3 years for a while now never have I ever caught deep feelings for him until recently.
It all started the night of valentines day he texted me in a pretty weird way instead of the usual "yo" it was "heyy" I was super confused but interested in what he needed he asked me how my day was and if I was free that night I said yes then he said texted "let me take you out then" I was so flattered because I didn't have anything to do valentines day but then the thought of him just wanting to hookup popped in my head I asked "what will we be doing" he replied with "grabbing some food then chill and whatever you want" so I'm like alright okay then I'm down
So later on that night he picked me up and we drove around asked if I was hungry I replied with no not yet so he asked the usual how you been etc questions and we had a cool conversation then we decided to have sex like usual but it was different he was so verbal with what he wanted and looked at me different from before I even caught he staring while I wasn't looking at him I asked "what" he replied with "I can't just look at you" I was confused because I'm fully clothed and didn't expect this attention from him we continued with getting ready for sex but he did something he never done before he kissed me and not just a peck a long intimate kiss and I was shocked afterwards we cuddled for the first time. On another recent time we were chilling but the vibe was so different we were joyriding from 1-5 am and we had very passionate sex seeing him turned on turned me on making the sex better then any other time he was more tochy and gentle but then rough in a good way we finished and enjoyed some music I was sad that our night ended so quickly I don't know why I'm falling for him now after all this time why?
I love when he smiles and touches me gently without realizing it or when he asks me if I'm alright because he can tell when I'm upset I Need advice

[Anonymous]

I think the friends with benefits thing is a recipe for disaster. I really don't even believe this type of relationship exists. One party is always hoping for more, while pretending they don't.
I think people should go for a relationship, or just a fuck buddy, but nothing in between.

[Asker]

I agree we been friends for so long and I never found myself falling in love with him. If I just out of the blue pour my feelings out who knows how it could end but gladly he's a understanding guy that I can trust I don't know why I'm struggling to say anything.. guess I'm sparing my feelings from being hurt

[Opinion Owner]

The answer is very simple. Just tell him that you need to end this. When he asks why, you say: "I really like being with you, but it turns out I'm not as good at this as I thought I'd be. I thought I could compartmentalize things, and it would be easy, but I was wrong. As hard as I try, the lines in my head keep getting blurred. I guess I'm just not cut out for this type of relationship. I think we are both looking for different things."

[PrettyPriya]

We can't tell you what you want, only you can decide that. If you have feelings and they are reciprocated, maybe talk to him about being more than friends with benefits.

[Asker]

Yes but another problem is I don't know if his family would accept me his mother especially being of a different race wanting to date her son who's Arab

[PrettyPriya]

That is something you would have to talk to him about and get a feeling for whether it can work or not. That is an entirely different problem. I'd start with a talk and then evaluate whether it is worth trying.

[Asker]

Thank you I honestly didn't know what to do and couldn't get any advice from my friends or family I appreciate your opinions

[PrettyPriya]

Absolutely my pleasure and happy to help. I you have further thoughts or questions, I would be glad to answer them here or in PM if you prefer privately.

[Twalli]

Unless you don't want a relationship with him, tell him what you're feeling. He's acting more like a boyfriend than previously. That's probably why you're catching feelings. He's treating you like a girlfriend.

[Asker]

I do but its just our cultural differences as well but I'm gonna try to open up more about it to him

[boggboss]

U have to decide that for yourself why not see if he is intrested and once u know go from there as stopping the friends with benefits won't just make the feelings vanish

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

I think you should ask him if he feels the same way. Otherwise, it’s up to you to decide how to go about this.

[Dargil]

Watch out! You might be falling in love. You may have converted a NSA casual sex arrangement into a life partner. You are already feeling loved and he is feeling love for you.

[In_Trance]

Up to you

[jay_teacher]

Say bye to your ability to pair bond

[Asker]

honestly

[Anonymous]

I stay away from girls like you, you screw with a guy's emotions. But he's to blame too, if he gets hurt or you get hurt.

[Asker]

The fact that you had to anonymously say this adds to how wrong you are get your head out your ass love

[Opinion Owner]

Have fun sleeping around :)

[Asker]

I will with the same person I've been doing it with for a while thanks have fun before you hit age 50 people your age need more sleep take care please