Should I tell my roommate I'm gay?

Im not sure whats the right thing here. When she walks around in her underwear i can't not look and i feel guilty. If she knew the truth about me she probably wouldn't want me seeing her half naked.
Updates:
+1 y
didn't expect this many answers. Thanks. I dont think im going to tell her outright but give ahint in that direction.
+1 y
Can all the people suggesting i sexually assault my friend kindly go fuck themselves? Seriously take a cold shower you idiotic perverts!
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Most Helpful Guys

  • You know your roommate better than anyone clearly your feelings have become more intense and you just want the burden of the secret off your back so not only should you casually tell her butt let her know that it's something that's important to you and it would be important to you if she listened and was able to relate in some way and perhaps that'll lead to bigger and better things however it's your life you should do what you want to do but I wouldn't wait too long I just treated like a Band-Aid you know your roommate better than anyone clearly your feelings have become more intense and you just want the burden of the secret off your back so not only should you casually tell her but let her know that it's something that's important to you and it would be important to you if she listened and was able to relate in some way and perhaps that'll lead to bigger and better things however it's your life you should do what you want to do but I wouldn't wait too long I just treat it like a Band-Aid QuikTrip it right off

  • I don't think it should be something you feel like you need to tell her or something that you feel like you have to hide. Just go about living your life the way you always do and if she ever ask the question you just say yeah as if it's not a big deal. Because it really isn't. Your sexuality is none of her business.

Most Helpful Girls

  • I believe that you should tell her so as to set the record straight and for her to take the appropriate measures in terms of being dressed correctly in your presence.

    Communication is important in any relation, whether intimate or just as roommates. That avoids confusion and you are able to set the record straight.

    You or her might have to either move out or find a compromise to prevent situations like that to ever occur.

  • I think if you are attracted to her. If its only when she's in her underwear thats just momentary attraction but doesn't mean you want to date her.

    If she's not your type then it is irrelevant no? You dont owe it to her to tell her if you dont see her like that anyway.

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What Girls & Guys Said

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  • Just tell her to ease things up. Do you think she would be okay? Not with walking in undies in front of you, but with you being gay. If yes, then whats the harm? Granted you won't have nice view anymore, but at least you will not feel guilty around roommate.

  • Don't say Anything unless you Suspect she is Gay. xx

  • I think you should tell her and give her the choice. I mean she still might not care who knows.

    • Update: I guess if you mention isn't so and so cute a lot she'll get the message.

  • I don't think it would affect your dynamic, she's got to see you noticing and glancing at her. Whether to be open or not is on you. Though just being yourself is a very liberating feeling

  • If you guys are friends then I might suggest for you to talk to her about it or don't say anything and move out to another place.

  • Yes she definitely should know,

    • Why?

    • Why not? She's parading half dressed around her, which she may be comfortable doing with straight women, but not with bi or lesbian women. Would also be nice for the roomate to know in case she brings girls back so the roomate knows to give them some space.

  • I would tell her so that she knows and becomes more aware. She likely does that because she's comfortable around you. I've done it.

  • if u have some feelings just say it

    • I dont. She's not my type.

  • I would personally tell her if I were you

  • read your bible and ask God whether you should tell your room mate this or not

  • Its shaky territory. Figure her out first. First make sure she isn't going to throw a bible at you. And see if she's ever been around gay people. Or specifically in your case, gay people of the same gender.

    It's probably best to just make subtle suggestions. Like telling her you find a celebrity attractive. Or asking her what she thinks of gay people. Test the waters and see how she reacts. If she seems pretty understanding then you may be all clear to go ahead and tell all.

  • Might be good to remind her that her running around like that all the time is making you uncomfortable. Totally normal women have issue with recklessly immodest roommates too, so this isn't a unique thing. I was fortunate to never have nudist roommates. I would've tried to find another dorm in short order. Even as a normal guy, just because a gal's body may be attractive to me, still doesn't equal liking it when she's forcing herself on me. And a dude? No sale. There's this one gal who does YouTube vids about Sims. She used Discover University to recreate her real college experience. And described a roommate who was always running around naked and causing trouble. If you have to find other living arrangements, do so. No chick is worth your sanity.

  • She probably already knows but I would tell her anyway. You have nothing to be ashamed of

  • Do you want something, personal, with her, are you just overthinking, and afraid of Hetero judgment?
    I've dated several women, and most of them were just comfortable with their nudity, or what they liked, like panties, and they never imagined that I saw them, and was loving how she was, and thinking sexy things, when she just was being her, in her 'place'!
    You should probably tell her, so if someone accidentally 'outs' you, not meaning to! You wouldn't want her to think the wrong thing, if someone says, and she just assumes, right?

  • I would tell her rip it off like a bandage. The longer you wait the hard it will be (also the more awkward it will be.

    • Absolutely agree!

  • Just grab her by the pussy like donald said.

    • BOOOB!!! LOLxxxxx

  • Should she tell you she's not gay?

  • I think if she's been walking around in her underwear then you ought to at least ask her not to do that, even if you don't tell her why. It's ultimately up to you to tell her you're lesbian not, but in this case I don't think it's right to just let her do that without realizing how you see her. Some people are uncomfortable around anybody in underwear, whether they are sexually attracted to them or not, so if you don't want to tell her you're lesbian then just say that. But I think you should say something.

  • Tbh I would just wait until a conversation pops up. It might work to watch a movie with a gay person in lead or whatever.

  • I say only tell her if you feel comfortable saying it. I don't think you need to tell her tho

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