Many people aren't aware what this is but I'll help break it down to you how an Alpha widow comes to be.
So, for the sake of this story let's arrange SMV in percentile. 90th percentile is top 10%. The typical Western girl in her 20's isn't looking to settle down, she's looking to have fun.
Let's make a hypothetical girl: we'll call her Jane. Let's say Jane is a fairly okay but still very average girl, we'll put her at 60th percentile at the age of 22.
Jane likes to have casual sex with guys who are 80th+ percentile.
These guys don't mind stooping downwards because guys love sex and for him, she's just another plate to spin who didn't take that much effort.
Once, she even was the plate for a guy who was 95th percentile. A real top dog. She didn't even make this guy wear a condom. He's handsome, in shape, wealthy, has a nice apartment and an expensive car, and a fat dick.
He's sleeping with a lot of other girls at the same time. She doesn't care, because girls would rather be one of many in the harem of a high status male, than the one and only of some average looking guy. He fucks her a few weeks than he moves on.
This guy is now her high water mark for the kind of guy that she thinks he can get.
But her fatal flaw is in assuming that she could ever get such a guy to commit to her. This kind of guy will fuck her, but that's it. Why would a 95th percentile guy commit to a girl like that? Are you fucking kidding me? Not a chance in hell he would do that. But yeah, he'll dump his load in her every now and then, no question of that.
Fast forward 10 years. Now she's 32. She's gotten fatter, started to get wrinkles, she's less fun and cheerful than she was in her 20's, and generally less attractive.
She dropped in value to a men: now let's say she's 40th percentile. However, in HER mind, she's increased in value: She now has a masters degree in law and working for a law firm making 90k a year and has 2 cats - this is a woman on top of her game! She now decides it's time to settle down because that biological clock is ticking.
But she finds that any of the type of men that she wants won't commit to her. She's used to banging 80+ percentile guys (remember that one who was 95?) and therefore imagines that this is the type that should marry/commit to her. But the reality is now that she's looking at guys who are double her SMV. Men who are equal to her SMV, she sneers at because they're "creepy" and "gross."
She could do better. She knows it! She's just awesome, obviously.
Every man, all her friends, her parents, media, music, and everyone else in society has been telling her since she was a toddler that she's awesome and great and perfect. Obviously it must be true. And that's why she "dated" so many hot guys in her 20's.
But nevertheless nobody will commit to her. Why are men such jerks?! Where have all the good men gone?! The world has wronged her. She's a victim. She's owed something that she isn't getting, and it's men's fault, because they're the ones not giving it to her.
Now she's 35 and realizes she has almost no time left to have kids. She marries a guy who is equal to her SMV. Another 40th percentile. He's not a bad guy, and there's nothing specifically offensive about him, but he isn't in shape, handsome, interesting, smart, or wealthy. Never mind the fact that she herself is not in shape, handsome interesting, smart, or wealthy either - but that doesn't stop her from secretly resented his mediocrity.
She silenced this resentment until the kids were pumped out. But in her mind, this guy isn't her equal - this guy is 40 percent lower in SMV than the men she used to fuck. This guy is a fucking loser.
Till one day he leaves the toilet seat up after he came home exhausted from working a 14 hour day to pay for their children and she decides that she's had enough of his "abusiveness", that she deserves better. Cue divorce and cash prizes.
Now she's 40 and hanging out in bars buying long island iced teas with her kids child support money, hitting on men twice her SMV, while her kids tuck themselves in on Friday night and can never hope to see daddy again.
TLDR? This is what we mean when is meant when we talk about the consequences of unchecked hypergamy. Women fucking around with high SMV players end up with fucked up proprieties and a distorted sense of their own worth, and are no longer LTR material as a result. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the alpha widow.
And this, my friends, this is why hypergamy is ultimately a losing game. Hypergamy is not bad for men, it's bad for women. Women don't have to put in effort to obtain sex like men do, so when women have sex with top tier males, they think it's because I'm an awesome woman! He validates my (high) sexual worth!. In fact, it was only an anomaly. If pussy was a currency, hypergamy would be the inflation that makes it worth less than previously assumed.
Example of this:
This reminds me of my ex who is bi. She would say that she found next to no value in a guy who found her attractive because at the end of the day, she knew they would fuck anything. (This is directed at you WHITE KNIGHTS)
With that being said, she claims she preferred women. After all things considered, I think its because she was seeking legitimate validation. Something she was unable to get from men. No matter who she could end up with, if its a man, it didn't say anything about her.
A white knight comment on a girls appearance is virtual worthless because they throw it out at every girl to improve their chances of getitng their dick wet. It basically makes whatever you say to a girl worthless.
I would add that hypergamy will always demand someone who is higher SMV and women will feel "cheated" with someone who is equal SMV. The issue with alpha widows is that they don't see a guy who is, say, a point higher in SMV as being sufficient, because they have gotten sex from guys who are a few points higher. So one point higher feels "bad" to them, when it should be sufficient for "normal" hypergamy. A woman will never feel good about being with a guy with the exact same SMV, because that isn't hypergamy, but she should be satisfied with a guy who is one point higher -- alpha widowhood messes that up.
Final Points on possible critiques:
For you white knights on the fence, this isn't an issue of men who are intimidated by a strong woman's past sexual exploits. That if she tells you those days are over and she doesn't do those things anymore and he was a jerk anyway and she loves you for you and sex isn't that important anyway, she must be telling you the truth now. You're not being compared to what she had in her past, you're being compared to what she couldn't have. She never had the alpha, she just fucked him, and therefore thinks she could have had him, but obviously she didn't lock him down. It's not that you can't compete with her exes, you can't meet her expectations, and she will always be less happy in your relationship.
Also, I don't think girls don't care about their alpha screwing other girls, it's just they're afraid to give him grief about it, because they want to be the last girl standing. They think he'll eventually pick her over all the others.
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