Sexual Relationships 
Sexual Health 
This is my very first MyTake, I hope you guys enjoy! I've decided to talk about something that I'm sure we're all a little too familiar with (unfortunately), side chicks.
More importantly, the reality of being a "side chick". There is no shame, I'll keep it real with y'all, I have been a side chick once myself and honestly it wasn't all that great! There was a lot of crying on my part and a lot of regret, followed by my constant necessity to have him please me one more time and of course there was the constant promise that he would leave her for me. I believed him of course. He was a beautiful man. Sad, what the fuck is wrong with you girl? I know, I know. Not one of my proudest moments. Lust is an evil bitch.
When we think of getting involved with these men, we know what comes with it for the most part. Good sex (maybe), a couple of crazy ex girlfriends (guaranteed), a crazy ass baby momma (bet your bottom dollar) and worst of all, unnecessary stress! That's what we don't think about when we decide to get involved with these men, all the stress and overthinking. How will this affect his child? How will this affect his girlfriend? Will I feel better after having sex with this guy or will I feel worse? Do you have good enough memory to keep up with all the lies? Can you fake a good Chinese accent for when his girl finally decides to call for "Takeout" in his contacts? It is too much!
The sex: It will be amazing the first few times. Clothes being ripped off, getting it on in the most spontaneous places (mostly because he can't actually take you home) but after a while it becomes routine and more about him than it ever was about you. He'd rather have you deep throat him for two minutes and nut in your mouth as opposed to enjoying your body and taking his time. They become sloppy and lazy. It's gross and very much the opposite of porn when the girlfriend would catch the adulterers in the act and join in. Trust me, you'll be driving back home a wet mess trying to steer while you finish yourself off anyways. Not fun. Not safe. Okay.. maybe a little fun, but definitely not safe.
The crazy exes and baby mommas: If they're crazy, they probably have a reason why they are that way. However, no one enjoys being chased through a park by some crazy chick with a paddle in her hand. I mean... unless, you're into that kind of stuff. Seriously though, it can become a very dangerous game very quickly if you aren't careful.
The unnecessary stress: As a "side chick" you have so much responsibility (lol stress, I meant STRESS GIRL) Actually shaving your legs, planning places to meet where you won't be seen or potentially caught, having to make time for him when he can't do that for you, having to low key spy on his girlfriend to make sure she isn't low key spying on you, keeping this man satisfied because after all, that is the only reason he comes to you.
The fact of the matter is, the side chick never wins. This man will not come to you forever. Eventually he will work things out with his girl and he will drop you as quickly as he picked you up. We do what we do to feel sexy, for the adrenaline rush, to feel wanted, to fill a certain void we have in our lives but at the end of the night, he gets to go home and lay in bed with someone who loves him while you're going home to nothing. A cold bed and even colder leftovers.
Let's learn to love, value and nurture ourselves, be happy and not mess with other peoples lives and most importantly not mess with other peoples men. xx
What Girls & Guys Said
22 20The last line says it all. Don't mess with such men and you will be happy. If you become a side kick you can be kicked out any time. So beware of such men.
Yup pretty much though the sad reality of it is a lot of girls aren't even aware that they are a side dish they think they're the main dish.
Best policy is to not be a side girl in the first place be the main broad or don't bother. Not only that but you don't want to be that girl who destroys a relationship. Because whether directly or indirectly by agreeing to be on the side you play party to the relationships failure and eventual doom. And at the end of the day you'll be the one to blame.
But how does a person prevent this from happening when they don't even know that they are the side dish in the first place? I had something similar to this happen. I was with a guy and he kept going on about how he was so happy with me. We had talked about us being exclusive and we were exclusive. But he was seeing other people which I wasn't aware of. It's not always easy to spot lies. Because some people are good at covering them up. It's a tough line to walk. Because people call you paranoid if you ask too many questions or automatically assume someone is up to no good.
@Darkfairie17 Well obviously if you don't know it's not your fault and there's nothing you can do about it. Your right some people are really good lying. Best thing you can do is keep your eyes and ears open.
I go through life with a very simple motto: Don't do to others what I don't want to have done to myself.
Aka if I would figure out a girl is in a relationship and just trying to have an affair with me I would instantly get rid of her. Too many people do not do that but rather give in to whatever selfish needs they have themselves. From lust to the desire for approval.
Interesting. I have never been the side chick. Never wanted to be. I know some who have, and it sucked for her. Although when she started, she didn't know she was the side chick. I think there are many who don't know they are. Shame on the men who do that. Shame on the women who agree to it willingly knowing they are one of the cheaters. It takes two to cheat.
Hmmm... well, I have had a bunch of them. At least a half-doz, and you're completely right, it's a hot mess.
The sad state of affairs in the dating world is that 80% of the women are chasing 15% of the men, so the hot/smart/high SMV guys are in high demand, married or not. A lot of the women think if they can get a pump-n-dump, which ain't too hard, they can actually land a high-SMV guy. Just simply not true.
I will say that the last affair lasted a loooong time. We really did fall in love, and I really did divorce the first wife, promising to make an honest woman out of the 'other chick' who was younger and MUCH better looking. It cost me all told a cool half-mil by the time the kids were grown up.
But I have been true to wife 2.0, no affairs, however she has cheated twice. A lot of reasons and situation there, but suffice to say we've worked things out and been together for over twenty five years.
DON'T DATE/PLAY WITH/OR FUCK WITH MARRIED MEN! :)
I don't know why anyone would want to put themselves in that position. I've been the side dude once and found out the hard way and it sucked.
Why would someone purposely become a homewrecker? Makes no sense to me.
Or don't be a sidechick
So basically "Being a whore is fun at first, but eventually makes you feeeeeeeel bad"
https://youtu.be/YTihsJQHt48How I feel about girls who let themselves get used and play themselves.
A toast:
to sweethearts and to mistresses...
.. may they never meet!
The reason why side chicks exist are because of women often liking the same small minority of guys. I came across a few studies that said the 80% of women are only attracted to 20% of guys. With numbers like that, of course there's going to be side chicks
Not wanting to insult you or anyone stuck in that kind of predicament but you put this on yourself in not leaving this douche after you found out that he already had someone. That is one of the worst things i have ever encountered, that people would rather be with someone that already has some one than someone like me that probably never will.
thanks for sharing
There are no side woman in open relationships, which is what almost all of these idiots think they're in, but only in their heads because they don't have the balls to ask/tell the main woman that is what they really want. There are a lot more people who are polyamorous than are willing to admit, subconsciously they know they are but they consciously try and keep it hidden... they lie to themselves, which makes it easier to lie to the other (s).
Actually id volunteer for the bitch that agreed to be a side chick & the guy to get killed. They are both meant for each other two idiots that are useless.
lol you sound exactly like a side chick. like a slut. as for being a side chick, a girl becomes like that cause she enjoys the power she has over her lover being able to expose him any moment and being the "forbidden fruit". but nonetheless its inferior insticts that lead someone there. there is no true self respect there.
It's common though everyone is right but still
who likes being a side chick anyway?
At least the side chick gets attention. Some women just need attention from the opposite sex. They feel unattractive without a guy in their life. Being a side chick isn't ideal, but it is better than nothing.
The last guy I was attracted to laughed at my tendency to rape him with my eyes, but I couldn't help it. I would have licked his whole entirè body if he'd let me, and since he never really chose to do anything with me I feel so bummed out that I never got a chance to play with him. I know life is unfair but i'm having a lot of trouble forgetting him, particularily since i'm rarely attracted to anyone and now i'm afraid to admit I like anyone because i'm afraid they'll think i'm not worth their time, like he obviously did. He seemed like so much fun and most guys i've seen around seem pissed off, violent, or demeaning to women. Yet, he's a photographer who is always taking nudes of skinny women. He obviously objectifies them but so many men do. I'm not skinny so i'm sure that's one reason he's not interested and I almost feel bad because of it. How do I get over the fact that i'll never get a chance at him? I figured i'd ask guys who know a thing or two about always being the ones to make a first move and having to deal with rejection. Anyone?
Please ignore the comment above. I posted in wrong place.