Threesome with my best friend and my husband?

Question

My husband has been bugging me about asking my best friend to have a threesome with us. But I am kinda possessive and don't like to share. I talked to another one of my girl friends and she said her husband did the same and Her husband was only interested in her friend because it was unfamiliar and new. He totally ignored her She was so bored and had a lot of resentment. I don't want this to happen with us

Chazmatazz269 · Accepted Answer

Even if you’re into the idea of a threesome, it’s a terrible idea to include someone you know. If you don’t want to share your husband, don’t. Tell him you won’t, in no uncertain terms to end his insistence. If you give in, the result will likely lead to resentment and that will end your marriage. If he’s already sick and tired of you and his threesome fantasy is just an excuse to philander, your marriage might already be at stake. If that’s a possibility, you have bigger fish to fry and swinging probably won’t help.
If your marriage is healthy and strong, and if you can be persuaded and he does, then you should understand that there is a right way and lots of wrong ways to go about having group sex. Open and honest communication is necessary from beginning to end.
First establish some ground rules governing who, what, where, when, how and why. This means examining your personal threesome fantasies and comparing notes. Unless they’re identical, you’ll have to establish compromise in order to proceed. You may only get to do this once, so you both have to be certain you get out of it what you want.
Then find someone, preferably a stranger. You should have already come to some agreement on what he or she must look like. I recommend hiring a professional. Otherwise, there are swinger sites full of people who are interested in and experienced at group sex. You could go through a hookup app, but i’d put that pretty close to someone you know for bad ideas club. The problem is that even if you can find some room between intimacy and sexual satisfaction, you’re blurring that line with someone you know. It should be a complete stranger so that everyone is less likely to “catch feelings”. I prefer professionals because your satisfaction is their top priority and they can play any role you like. Otherwise, you’re adding a third person’s needs and desires to the mix; and they’re feelings.
Finally, invite your choice over to discuss your fantasy and see if they’re down to get down. Open and honest communication is a must, every step of the way.
As for your friend and her husband, you’re not her and your husband ain’t him. That comparison is ridiculous. Also, they fucked up. I guarantee they didn’t go about it smartly. Their marriage may be the price of their ignorance.
But this is worth repeating: if you’re not into it, don’t do it. If you can’t come agreements on everything along the way, don’t do it.
I spent about a year in the swing scene. Most of the people i met had mostly great experiences and good things to say about the lifestyle. But everyone knew someone for whom swinging ruined their marriage or relationship. I met one couple on the verge of disaster. The common theme was too little to no communication. People who supposedly love each other weren’t talking about what they needed and wanted from their marriage and their extramarital dalliances. You have to talk, and you have to be honest.

Wish4UrB00ty · Accepted Answer

The issue with threesomes is that you have to be all on the same page. And ergo be who enjoyed them managed to be all on the same page as everyone else in the group.

Even with being possessive you could have a lot of fun with it but you really need to find out his motivations core. And if you decided to bring your friend in you need to make sure that she understands the situation.

Reece12345 · Answer

If you don't want it, you should never feel pressured into doing it.

You should set boundaries with your husband and make sure that he understands them.

Never let yourself get forced into something that you don't want.

Summeroflove · Answer

This is disgusting and will ruin your marriage.

DavidRaul · Answer

I don't think you are ready for this yet. It will make your experience worse if you aren't into it.

stratford · Answer

Does the idea of a threesome turn you on? If you are doing it purely for his pleasure then maybe it isn't a good idea?
If you are open to trying it, just out of curiosity, then perhaps set some ground rules and discuss what would be acceptable?

JPresidente · Answer

Don’t do it. Anytime you give permission for your significant other to put his D in another P, you’re risking him becoming enamored with her over you and destroying your relationship.

AimeeKyle · Answer

Doing things with friends would be very tricky. I don’t think I would ever do it unless many discussions were had with all…. and all were on the same page and all had the same goals. Even then, I’m still not sure I would do it. It could change / end the friendship.

Brando10222 · Answer

Punch his face and say no again. If he doesn't listen than dump him

HippieVeganJewslim · Answer

If You want not to share Your husband, don't. Threesomes seem to be kosher if the man is married to both women.

Twalli · Answer

That will happen with a threesome. The third person will get the most attention because they're not there for good. You will still be with your husband after the threesome, so he'll want to do most stuff with her because she's not staying once it is done.